Don't forget to keep everything in persepective, and to take it one day at a time.

wow.. this is quite an inspirational thread... some amazing advice and encouragement from the group of people here known as the TFP community

I have an offtopic question, Washington, what's your career path?

Oh boy, you got my started...


During the Summer and Fall:

I attend The University of Akron, Ohio, as a physics student full time. Also, I am an Emergency Medical Technician (dude in an ambulance) and volunteer for a local fire station, A member of our local Search and Rescue Team, and a member of our Rescue Dive Team.


During the Winter (dec 10-June1) I move out west and am a level III certified PSIA Instructor for a ski resort out there. I also am a Tail guide for a ski guide company out there.


By the time I am 25, I will be a part time fighter pilot for the Air National Guard (flying 1 weekend a month/two weeks a year). From March-June I will fly to Alaska to guide helicopter skiing and fly back once a month to fulfill my air national guard duties.

During the time of the year that I am not heli-ski guiding or busy with air national guard duties, I will guide scientific expeditions and mountaineering expeditions all over the world.

If I ever get to old or decide I want to settle down a bit, I will, by then, have amassed enough hours to fly for a commercial ariliner. They make 200k a year and are only allowed to fly 15 days/month.



Currently, I have these accomplishments under my belt:

Eagle Scout
EMT-B
PADI Rescue Diver
Almost 3 years finished towards my physics degree
PSIA level III, Intermountain Ski Instructor
Canadian Avalanche Association Level I, Participant
6 years instructing experience
Privates Pilots License

OMG I totally agree with you john but he also has the effects of society bearing down on him.
MY ADVICE is to be yourself be honest to yourself and others, remember all you have accomplished so far in your life and be proud of that! Do NOT let others' opinions drag you down and never ever look at the ground keep your chin up or level with the ground it gives off the impression of confidence and being comfortable in the path you have taken in life(girls like that)!
ONE MORE THING as far as asking a pretty or beautiful girl out look at is this way life is full of regret and rejection is a 50/50 thing. The women could say yes 50% of the time or no 50% of the time. Besides if they say no its their loss not yours!!!
BTW i am female!!

Hey buddy, i just wanted to throw in my 2 cents worth. Just like a lot of people posting here, I've been in your shoes. It looks like you're getting some good advice here, i just wanted to give you 2 quick ideas;
1) find some guy friends. It's a lot easier to find and talk to groups of girls when there's more than one of you looking. Some one to back you up, go out with you, help th eprocess along. God bless the wingman
2) Ever think about taking up a personal trainer job at a local health club? It's good pay, good times, and a great way to meet people with similar interests as you. it might be a start.
Best of luck

One sure fire way to meet women: The coffee bar.

Go to a coffee house once every 2 or 3 days for a few weeks. Bring a book, sit and drink. Become a regular. Start the nod and smile deal at the other regulars. Move up to a wave and then finally to the talk. Ask to go out for a cup of coffee some time ( this will get a laugh usually). Go to the movies, have dinner, have sex, get married and die. It all starts with the coffee bar.

I just spent the last 30 minuts reading this whole thread. The reason was, because Im almost on the same boat, besides that I idont have as many activities in my day.

I have only two good friends, Im not a bad looking guy, but Im skinny and its burried in me, although Im getting over it(I think). I need to find more things to fill out my day. I work and then go home do nothing. Im 18 years old, and my life stinks.

I saw you get better there, but with this post it just seems like you are giving up on all your new friends.

Never fear my man - at 6'2" and 200 lbs, your sure to get your share of chick action in college. Even if you have two noses, you're in there! Just relax and be yourself. Its easy to tell if somebody is uneasy with themselves (insecure). Women smell fear like grizzly bears smell deer. Act like your in total control of yourself and your emotions (even if your desperate as hell) and you should have no trouble finding women to date. Just remember, that girl that was flirting with you probably likes you and wouldn't mind going out with you if you asked. She could have been talking about somebody elses boyfriend, an old boyfriend, or even a new boyfriend (that's best, because then you can steal her right from under his nose)! Hang in there and you will be waking up smelling like perfume in no time. Guaranteed!

Although physical looks shouldn't be a factor in self-confidence, they are. Like the mature will tell you, work on your inner self, as that is the real deal. Accept you for who you are, and be happy with you.

Personally, I try to do that. I'm happy and proud of my body. However, you aren't, it seems. Work on the 'inner' side, but also join a gym. Eat right, and lift hard. In three weeks or so, you should start seeing a difference. Others around you notice, and you feel better about yourself. It also helps you sleep, gives you more energy, and helps with acne (I think) if you have that problem.

Smile at those around you. You'd be amazed at the results. I'm sure you're a grand guy. Go for it.

Washington - I've followed this whole thread and you're got a LOT going for you on many different fronts. Don't let your female issues discourage you from anything. These things work themselves out over time and you'll end up with someone real special in the process. I can't give you any specific advice that hasn't already been posted. You're doing everything right and will eventually have a HELL of a life!

The biggest problem is probably that you are spending too much time in forums asking what is wrong rather than trying to get out and meet someone.

sometimes, find a different environment from where you would normally be and just act a little bit like an idiot.... do or say things that you are not really comfortable saying in a normal situation. At a very minimum, this will make the things you do in a normal environ expand a little and open yourself up. Seriously, some of the most successful "social" people I know are idiots !!!

Old-ass thread that I recall reading with a massive grin.

Any new info, Washington? C'mon out, if you'd like! :)

I am on date #3 with a very beatutiful girl, and have dated exentsively before this girl (well, relative to what I was doing...)

Its weird...I just ask now. Granted I still psych myself out sometimes...but usually...I just ask.

I have had many brush offs and mean people who were just plain...mean. But...like i said above, since I started this thead, I have dated 4 people....1 for over a month. and i am now up to date 3 with an awesome girl!

I must say, thanks TFP members!

nice deal... I'm digging this thread... it's quite motivational to me ... even though I'm happily married, I can see just encouragement and development from all those involved.

good luck!!!!

wow, that's *really* anonymous...

Boo! guess who?

I thought id give an update. Act like you care and reply :)

Since I posted the original post, I am/have

A) been on dates with 4 girls.
B) dated two of them for more than 3 months
C) one of those actually lasted 5 months
D) am currently single
C) got laid ...a bunch :)


I dont really find myself actively looking for girls, I just let it happen.

Im in a dryspell right now :( heh

The last girl is the one who lasted so long...but she turned out to be very evil and crazy and belonged to a religious cult (redundant..I know). I wouldnt have minded, except she couldnt let me do my thing..always tying to convert me.

So yea..im still alive and all and doing well.

Laterz

I just found and read through this thread and must say this has been a very helpful and encouraging read.

I'm very happy to hear that the advice has worked for you as I'm confident much of the advice will be helpful for me as well.

Completely kickass, Washington. Glad to hear that you're having a blast. Keep rockin'.
:D

Take heart, single folks.

I am 28 years old, and I've never had a girlfriend -- never even been kissed.

So you aren't as bad off as I am, most likely...

From what I've seen, self-esteem seems to be the big thing. If you don't have that, nothing else matters.

Wish I knew how to get that, though... all my friends have had at least one girlfriend, and they like to spend lots of time talking about it. Wish I could join in on those conversations....

So, as I get older, and I have to watch all of my friends get hooked up and eventually married, it gets harder and harder to feel at all confident.

And just so you know.... No, I do not spend all my time in front of a computer -- I get out every weekend. No, I am not some asshole, or a pathetic loser. No, I am not homosexual. Yes, I am interested in girls. Yes, I've made good friends with lots of girls -- they just always say no when I ask them out.

So, I do not have any clue how I am to meet a girl who will actually say yes.

ouch!

Ask a random girl on a date. One you've never met before. Catch her eye, ask her out.

yeah, what she said.

A ray of hope?
 

For what it's worth, I was in a very similar situation to yours. At the age of 27, I had never even been kissed by a girl. Even holding hands with a member of the opposite sex seemed like a fantasy that would never come true.

I couldn't figure it out either... I was active, reasonably confident, I participated in various clubs, had a variety of interests, and I made an effort to look and smell my best at all times. My female friends couldn't understand why I hadn't been snapped up by someone, but of course they would never consider dating me... I was at the point where I started believing that girls didn't exist.

I had asked many girls out, but the answer was always "no". I did just about everything to try to meet girls except for speed dating. I joined a bunch of internet dating sites in an effort to try to improve my conversational skills and try to get over any awkwardness towards girls.

Eventually, with enough perserverance, I actually met a wonderful girl who lives nearby. We've been dating for about four months now, and things are going really well.

So, there is hope for single men, even if they have no experience whatsoever. It is disheartening to read statistics claiming that the average age that a boy loses his virginity is 16... but I really don't mind being 11 years late...

My sister's husband met her when he was 28, and she was his first girlfriend. Using statistics on my family indicates that the average male loses their virginity at 27.5. ;)