power of attorney
 

I'm not sure this is the right place for this since I'm giving advice instead of asking for it, but here goes:

There are a lot of unmarried folks out there on TFP and I urge you to get a power of attorney now while you are still conscious.

When my unmarried, 25-year-old brother was unconscious in the hospital, my mother and I had a hellish time doing anything on his behalf - depositing his paychecks, getting the keys to his apartment and mailbox, signing disability forms, paying his bills, etc., because he didn't have a power of attorney. If he had survived but stayed in a coma, we would have had to go through a lengthy legal process to be appointed as guardians. It was hard enough dealing with the medical side of things without having to deal with all the legal and financial crap.

So now, while you are well and sound, please appoint someone to have medical and/or legal power of attorney if you're incapacitated. You can do it lots of places on the web for like $20. It'll save your families and loved ones a lot of hassle if you're ever in the hospital but can't speak for yourself. Thanks for listening.

Very good advice.

While your setting things up for the worst, you might want to make sure your reletives know your wishes (eg. a will). Its hell when someone dies and doesn't leave a will. Oh, and don't forget- organ donors save lives. Sign the back of your driver's license. Thats all you have to do, in Illinois at least .

A medical power of attorney is _especially_ important if you're living with someone that you consider your partner, but whom you are not married to. Unless you give your partner a medical power of attorney, he or she will have no rights if anything happens to you; that'll be up to whatever relative manages to take control.

Without a medical power of attorney, your partner will have no control over treatment decisions, or even the right to hang around if your parents/guardians decide otherwise. You could end up with your parents back in control of (what's left of) your life in a big hurry.

Amen. Even if your partner and your family get along well normally, this will be stressful time and things may go haywire; your partner will need to be protected.

Bear in mind, though, a power of attorney gives enourmous power. You need to be very sure about whoever you give it to, nd you need to be careful to only give them the powers you want. I'd recommend going to a lawyer to get it drawn up so there are no mistakes. Worst case scenario with a power of attorney gone wrong is that you can be cleaned out legally, with no recourse, or even committed. Get a lawyer you trust, give it to people you trust. The cool guy you just met? Uh-uh. The person you've been living with for a couple of years? Sure.

skogafoss and I married and it was good that we did... otherwise when I was sent to ER during a bad asthma attack it would have been very hard for anyone to help out since family was hours away.

you need to discuss this information with people. Talk about it. It's not easy it's a hard thing to do but that's what being an adult is sometimes about.

we don't have the same last name and even this weekend at the hotel we stayed at they gave her grief when checking in because the reservation was in my name not hers. She was to check in and I was to follow her at a dinner after I got to the hotel and cleaned up.

simple things we take for granted....

Does anyone know when your parents lose power of attorney naturaly? I know that you can wrest it away from them at 18 (or earlier if you have a good reason to) but that if you leave it alone they get to keep it a little while longer. Does anyone know details?

Cultural, I suspect. My wife and I have never, that I can recall, had this problem in New Zealand, although telemarketers and the like always assume she's Mrs Donaldson. Which gets them an earful.

I've been called Mr. (her-last-name) and she's been called Mrs. (my-last-name) and we take it in stride, "Yup, that's me."

We have PoA and Medical PoA on each other. It's a lot easier than getting married (and a LOT easier to cancel). Heck, my work even extends medical benefits to domestic partners.

I'm not sure about this one -- I'll ask a couple of friends who are attorneys and let you know what I find out.

Watch out as to who you give a POA to - not to be done lightly!