Lost out on a promotion - How to deal?
 

I lost out on an important early-promotion opportunity yesterday, and it's left me feeling very bitter/depressed/angry. I knew, on a conscious level, that not getting it was always a possibility, but I think sub-consciously I was too confident. The reason being everyone I work with, including my chain, thought I was deserving of it, and it definitely pumped me up.

So the promotion went to someone else in my organization, who, while not necessarily worse than me, certainly wasn't better.

So I'm left wondering, what does he have that I don't have? And sure, my unit wants me and cares about, but what about the larger organization?

*sigh* It's like these last 2 years of hard work are meaningless, and I might as well have been one of the slackers/dirtbags who cooled their heels for the last 2 years, and are going to get promoted at the same time as me.

Okay, enough venting. And before you tell me to suck it up, believe me, I've been telling myself that for the last 24 hours now.

it doesn't mean that the 2 years of hard work are meaningless, and cooling your heels doesn't do much good for you also.

why don't you ask the decision maker what set you two apart? what different skill sets or experience did the other person have that you didn't.

now the answer may not lead to anything tangible, but it's the best place to get the answer you are seeking.

after that, continue to work hard like you have because that's you, if it doesn't get you somewhere in the place that you are in, it will help you at a place that is outside of your current situation.

when it's time to grow it may be time to go...

First of all, I'm sorry Sparhawk, to read your sad news. This is a great opportunity for growth. I suggest going to the higher ups and saying, "you know, I was really interested in blah blah position. I'm disappointed I did not get it and want to know truthfully what I can do to improve myself so that you will consider me next time blah blah happens?" Then graciously accept and apply the feedback! You've done two things by taking this step: 1. You let your bosses know your intent. 2. You show a willingness to take and apply feedback -- always a plus! Good luck!

A guy at work said to me, "Don't worry too much about it. This is just the first disappointment in a long series of disappointments to come throughout your career."

I think he was trying to cheer me up...

If you were just working hard over the last 2 years for the purpose of getting this specific promotion, then yes, the last 2 years were meaningless, and would have better been spent slacking off. Of course, hindsight is 20/20 and had you not worked you would have obviously had NO change of getting promoted.

If you worked hard because you enjoy your job or are a good and dedicated employee or take pride in what you do, or by working hard increased your knowledge, impressed your peers, and better set yourself up for future promotions and/or recommendations when searching for other employment, then it is not a waste. Even if you have to leave your current job to find suitable employment, you don't want your boss to get a reference call only to say "yeah, he slacked off for the last two years.".

Remember you have a choice -- no one is stopping you from doing the bare minimum to keep your job and not advance. But the path to advancement is fret with disappointment, and is not always fair. As they say, you've got to risk a lot to gain a little.

Their decision might have been based on certain aspects that he might have possesed that you didn't. By this I mean, he might have had more training in a certain area, more schooling, better fit (in their mind) for handling the responsibilities that would come with the promotion.

I agree with sexymama, go to your superiors (after you've calmed down) and respectfully inquire as to why he got the promotion over you and what you could do next time a promotion is up to improve your chances. It shows initiative, ability do effectively communicate, and desire to improve. Good luck!

If you want that job, get hired into it. Look on the net for the job you lost and apply for it. Your company will be losing you, and it is their loss. Make sure you let them know you are leaving because you didnt get promoted. Everyone will know why you left, will see you were better, and company moral will be destroyed.

Most importantly,
You leaving for a better job is their loss.

possible, another (better) opportunity will arise.

Working hard = good

Provided your management doesn't fit into the catagory of "Ignorant Assholians/Droids/Morons in suits" working hard in the long run is a good idea. Otherwise go somepalce else and work hard there were your effort and skills will be rewarded.

Re: Lost out on a promotion - How to deal?
 

So, are you military then? Might get better responses that can help if u let peeps know that. I've never been in the military and cant recall anyone in my jobs that has referred to their peers as being in his/her "unit" :)


just a thought

Bill

I can't feel passionate or pity for someone who blames someone else.

Though the original post is not as vehement as to reek hate, it does not win me over with "I support this guy" feeling too it.

My suggestion, you are still a valued employee and just enjoy what you do.

If it's any comfort, you *do* have a job. I've been interning since last September and am about to go stir crazy. Don't take your salary for granted :D. Oh, the things I could get...like a place of my own...You have it good.

Keep working, people will notice eventually- try to have step goals. Work hard for an achievable, tangible goal, one at a time, until you get to where you want to be.

very true.. not only do you have to work hard, but you have to be willing to play the game.. that doesn't necessarily mean kiss ass, but it does mean you have to be willing to do some things you may not be interested in.

Ahhh....patience young grasshopper....who is to say that the missed promotion will not set you up for a better one in the near future or a life leason which will be better. I am a very impatient type A personality that abhores delay...but I have learned to trust that god has a plan for everything and that a delay today may be a prize tomorrow.

Gotta agree with others. Check back with the decision maker, find out why they didn't choose you and what you can do to better your chances in the future. If they are less than forthcoming or take this opportunity to criticize then I'd be checking out the want ads. I wouldn't move on till I found the right position but if I got the impression that they thought I wasn't close to being ready for the next level it would be bye bye. Unless of course that they are accurate in their assessment of your current level and are willing to help get you to the next level.

Just my .02.

"Well, it was between you and him. We couldn't make a decision, so we flipped a coin. It came up 'tails', so we promoted him."

This was pretty much it. Oh well, back to the grind. Thanks for the comments and criticisms. I just needed to vent off some steam, but 2 weeks of vacation has straightened me out. :)