taking her picture would mean interacting with her o.O

I'm trying to avoid this.

I've got an AR you can have.. I never use the damn thing. It's not sighted in, and I can't hit shit even at 100 yards, so I'm not certain if you'll be able to. And yea, no rounds to give you, either. But you could strap it to the underside of your bed so that when she ties you to the bed and starts flogging you with a high heel tied to her belt and clawing your face with her fingernails while screaming YAAAAAA BABY and spinning her head around like the exorcist you only have to get one hand free to detach it from the underside of the bed frame and ask her if she feels lucky .. it's got all the tactical bullshit like a red dot and forward grip that turns into a bipod if you need to get really fancy or hit her in the back as she runs out..

RUN!! Run as fast as you can. Do not pack anything. Do not take anything. It will only slow you down. Move to another city. Move to another state. Move to another country. Change your name. Change your appearance. Not that any of that will help you in the least should you succumb to your primal urges and bed the looney tune. She will own you. Years from now, after you have long since thought yourself safe, she will call you...just to "see how you're doing", and to "get back in touch". You, sir, are fucked. Consider this; she says that she is a virgin. Well, no matter how crazy she is, somebody thought; "So what? She's hot". So...she's either lying, or she is just SO batshit crazy that even the "fuck it and run" guys got scared off? Yeah...she's only hot because you're playing with fire.

Plan9! Yeah, those apple shaped ass prints are the absolute best, aren't they?

Not that I want Shauk to end up dead and stuffed in this girl's apartment, but damn I love this thread. I can't wait to read what happens next.

Where's Bear Cub at? He'd could disrespect this woman into sanity... or marriage.

I think Shauk needs to make this into a science experiment and date the girl for a few weeks. Then he should post her behaviors and reactions during their encounters on this thread and everyone can make suggestions on her actual problems until we finally figure it out.

The only issue I see with this experiment is it might result in Shauk being injured, tortured or killed.

Or Shauk being mentally scarred for life, on top of those other things.

See, I knew you guys cared about my sanity and well being over your own amusement.... well, some of you :p

you need to find that bird from the fast food joint from a few months back.

you need to find her, stalk her and tell her that you're a virgin. she cant say no to a good looking guy like you.

Some? I count three.
Two really, 'cause one's kinda iffy and could really go either way.

fast food girl? doesn't ring a bell. *shrug*

*moving forward*

If Bill is counting himself in there, I'm calling "bullshit". Everyone knows that he's just waiting for you to move out so that he can get out of Omaha, squat in your apartment and hope that she takes as much a liking to him as she did you. You had him at "Alyson Hannigan".

Shauk, I'm really not that worried about you. From what I've seen, you're not one of those guys that's going to "slip and accidentially fall into her vagian, penis-first. Repeatedly." Stay out of her pants and all she's going to do is make your life interesting (and that's a neutral term - an apartment fire would be "interesting").

This thread kicks ass.

I keep waiting for 'so last night I get home and the door to my apartment is unlocked'. Waiting.....waiting...........waiting.

I was gonna tell you to stage a gay moment for her benefit......ya know, a hug that's a little too long or a kiss on the cheek with a male friend. But then I realized, crazy is crazy and if she's really into you, she's gonna try even harder to get you to switch teams.

I've always had a thing for the crazy ones, so speaking from experience I can tell you, ignoring them rarely works. If you're really nervous about this girl and her intentions, you're going to have to have a gentle conversation with her about 'NOT INTERESTED'. And end it with 'no time for new friends'. If you leave the 'friends' potential open, she will climb through that window every chance she gets. If you're too hard on her, it can get ugly.

The only proven method I know works, is distraction. Introduce her to 'that guy' whose always hanging around, that no one really likes. Come on, we all know one. 2 birds with one stone, so to speak.

While I have sympathy for anyone so distraught and lonely, sometime it's a matter of survival, hers or yours. Crazy always wins, they have no rules.

But in the mean time, keep us updated and keep a camera close. This thread needs more pictures.

Totally. It was in your blog, I'm pretty sure. Some girl hitting on you at an outdoor fast food stand, either hot dogs or ice cream.

ohhh hot dog girl, yeah, honestly gave up on that notion. I was still hung up on the other girl at that point so *kicks self*

Mine was the kinda iffy one. :D

I do beleive that I've been outed. :paranoid:
Curse you, Jazz! Curse you for putting paid to my nefarious scheme.