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Old 06-05-2010, 01:50 PM   #1 (permalink)
Eat your vegetables
 
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What Women Can't Do

Let's reinforce stereotypes.

Then bust stereotypes up!

What do you think women can't do?
What have you heard women can't do?
Feel free to be sexist.
Or not, as you desire.
Women, feel free to offer a rebuttal.
Share your experiences, or those of the women in your lives.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------
My husband and I have this debate (comically) frequently. According to him, women can't fart, and their poops are invariably dainty.


I was raised to believe that women couldn't think scientifically, that they couldn't process complex thought. That they had an affinity for nurturing rather than reason, and therefore they were incapable of any complex sin. You can imagine my frustration and confusion when I didn't fit into any of the molds such a society offered for a female, and no matter how I tried to fit in, I simply didn't. I began to hate femininity and desire to be something that I simply was not. I dreamed of having the freedom offered any man, and frequently cross-dressed with little success. I soon realized that I could shed the religion and walk into an entirely different life, one free from the shackles that held me into submission.
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Old 06-05-2010, 02:16 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Women can't get why the film Braveheart is an undisputed masterpiece.
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Old 06-05-2010, 02:27 PM   #3 (permalink)
follower of the child's crusade?
 
women cannot be rapists.
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for all things are plain in the sight of Heaven. For nothing
hidden will not become manifest, and nothing covered will remain
without being uncovered."

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Old 06-05-2010, 02:30 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Women can't write their names in the snow.
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Old 06-05-2010, 02:31 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Strange simply wins this thread out of mere participation.

Women can't make steak!
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Old 06-05-2010, 02:50 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Xerxys View Post
Women can't make steak!
Kill it. Dress it. Butcher it. Season it. Grill it, RARE. Done with diamond marks.... I can do that.

I can even inseminate it, birth it, feed it, and make it grow before I do the above. (Prey-animals that is, so as not to be accidentally confused with a "cannibal").

---------- Post added at 06:50 PM ---------- Previous post was at 06:47 PM ----------

Maybe I should add artificially inseminate, so as not to be confused as a mistress or masteress of "bestiality."
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Old 06-05-2010, 02:54 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Women will never appreciate the need to quote Arnold Schwarzenegger's lines from his various action epics.
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Old 06-05-2010, 02:59 PM   #8 (permalink)
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"If it bleeds, we can kill it." and I can grill it

"Hasta la vista, baby!"

but remember,

"I'll be back."

Maybe I should have been born a man, or maybe just with a dick.
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Old 06-05-2010, 02:59 PM   #9 (permalink)
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Women cannot have any reaction besides "oh my God!".

Women cannot argue effectively and admit when they're wrong.
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Old 06-05-2010, 03:05 PM   #10 (permalink)
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"oh my CROM", I was way wrong, with one of these (my cunt) I can have as many dicks as I want, the only problem is, now I think I want a pussy cat, they scratch my itch better.

---------- Post added at 07:05 PM ---------- Previous post was at 07:01 PM ----------

o.k. so you've got me on the snow thing, but I'm o.k. with that, I hate snow..... I do love Braveheart though, and who the hell wants to be a rapist, only a rapist would know, I do like power and chains and leather and submissiveness and did I say power.
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Old 06-05-2010, 03:10 PM   #11 (permalink)
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Women can not travel to approx. 1/3 of the world and be treated any where near equal to a man.
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Old 06-05-2010, 03:14 PM   #12 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tully Mars View Post
Women can not travel to approx. 1/3 of the world and be treated any where near equal to a man.
you owned me, Tully Mars.
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Old 06-05-2010, 04:49 PM   #13 (permalink)
Comment or else!!
 
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From experience, they're good with directions...and being on time.
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Old 06-05-2010, 05:15 PM   #14 (permalink)
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Women will never understand Chuck Norris
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Old 06-05-2010, 05:17 PM   #15 (permalink)
 
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Women can't hold their liquor....obviously.

No wait, that's not a stereotype, it's true.
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Old 06-05-2010, 05:19 PM   #16 (permalink)
I Confess a Shiver
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ring View Post
Women can't hold their liquor....obviously.
Untrue. My current partner drinks me under the table w/ straight Jack.
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Old 06-05-2010, 05:23 PM   #17 (permalink)
Une petite chou
 
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I love Chuck and Arnold.
I kick ass at steak.
I'm wrong all the time.
I have written my name in the snow.
I think Braveheart is freaking AWESOME, I've seen it 5 times.
I've met a woman charged with raping another woman and one with raping a man. (hint: she used a cock ring to get him hard. She came, he didn't. It was ruled rape)

Women can't escape sexism. Neither can men, but that was not the OP.
Women can't bench press as much as the strongest man.
They can't ejaculate semen.
They have zero control over the sex of their child. Xs only.
Women can't do a Wild Bill impersonation as effectively as a man. I've tried.
It's just not cool...
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The question isn’t who is going to let me; it’s who is going to stop me. Ayn Rand
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Old 06-05-2010, 05:25 PM   #18 (permalink)
 
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Niner,your woman drinks you? While under the table with a straight guy named Jack?

Women metabolize alcohol slower than men do, and they suffer the ill effects
of hard drinking sooner.
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Old 06-05-2010, 05:28 PM   #19 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Plan9 View Post
Untrue. My current partner drinks me under the table w/ straight Jack.
Yeah, but you drink like a woman .

I've had a lot of girls I've been with out drink me, it's awesome.
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In my own personal experience---this is just anecdotal, mind you---I have found that there is always room to be found between boobs.
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Old 06-05-2010, 05:30 PM   #20 (permalink)
Junkie
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Plan9 View Post
Untrue. My current partner drinks me under the table w/ straight Jack.
During my College Days I was known to be a somewhat Hefty Drinker. On several occasions, over the course of an evening (about 6-7 hours), I have been known to drink an entire bottle of Captain Morgan. A particular rugger from the women's team and I raced on one occasion, and she beat my pants off. Not only did she finish her bottle nearly an hour before I did, but she did it without while maintaining her ability to walk straight and speak in complete sentences.
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Old 06-05-2010, 05:31 PM   #21 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LordEden View Post
I've had a lot of girls I've been with out drink me, it's awesome.
hehehehehehe
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Old 06-05-2010, 05:34 PM   #22 (permalink)
Human
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Strange Famous View Post
women cannot be rapists.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Xerxys View Post
Strange simply wins this thread out of mere participation.
Based on the long, long history of posts on TFP, I'm going to have to agree.

Rape by gender - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Quote:
Non-statutory female-on-male rape

Much like female erectile response and contrary to popular opinion, Male erectile response is involuntary.[16][17] Rape of a man by a woman is thus possible.
However, male victims of sexual abuse by females[18] often face social, political, and legal double standards.[19] Though studies show otherwise,[20] female abusers are usually seen as less culpable than male abusers/rapists by the courts due to these misconceptions. Since rape by females is much less well known than male-female abuse, male victims of female abusers often find little support from rape crisis centers and even the authorities. While gender neutral laws have combated the older perception that rape never occurs to men,[21] and other laws have eliminated the term altogether,[22] the double standards still remain. Due to these reasons, it is likely being substantially under-reported, with the probable cause being the double standard.[23]
Other possible contributing reasons for the lower percentage of reported female-on-male rapes include lack of lasting effects/evidence such as inpregnation or the male may not be entirely against the female's advances.

Rape of females by females

Female on female rape is often labeled "lesbian rape", though the sexual identity of one or both (or more) persons involved may or may not actually be lesbian. Forced penetration by another female is possible with the use of strap-ons, dildos, other foreign objects and digital penetration.
A few books, such as Violent Betrayal: Partner Abuse in Lesbian Relationships by Dr. Claire M. Renzetti,[24] No More Secrets: Violence in Lesbian Relationships by Janice Ristock,[25] and Woman-to-Woman Sexual Violence: Does She Call It Rape? by Lori B. Girshick[26] also cover the topic of rape of females by other females.
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Old 06-05-2010, 05:51 PM   #23 (permalink)
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Location: I'm up they see me I'm down.
Women can't be reasonable. Or rational.

But they do have an arguably higher pain tolerance. Child birth anyone?
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Old 06-05-2010, 06:09 PM   #24 (permalink)
warrior bodhisattva
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by FelixP View Post
Women can't be reasonable. Or rational.
The problem with this is that it's been found that women are more reasonable than men in certain situations, and that it can be said that men can't be rational either.
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Knowing that death is certain and that the time of death is uncertain, what's the most important thing?
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Humankind cannot bear very much reality.
—From "Burnt Norton," Four Quartets (1936), T. S. Eliot
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Old 06-05-2010, 06:10 PM   #25 (permalink)
I Confess a Shiver
 
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^

Don't argue with a United States Marine. It has been proven that their mind is impregnable.

...

Women can't look sexy in military fatigues. Google ninjas... GO.
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Old 06-05-2010, 06:16 PM   #26 (permalink)
warrior bodhisattva
 
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^ what's wrong with you?

Women in uniform = hawt!
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Knowing that death is certain and that the time of death is uncertain, what's the most important thing?
—Bhikkhuni Pema Chödrön

Humankind cannot bear very much reality.
—From "Burnt Norton," Four Quartets (1936), T. S. Eliot
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Old 06-05-2010, 06:26 PM   #27 (permalink)
I Confess a Shiver
 
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Maybe on TeeVee. In real life? Covered in mud and squat-pissing on the side of the road? They're just men who (often) can't ruck as much.

...

Women are better at parking vehicles with trailers. They don't overanalyze the situation.
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Last edited by Plan9; 06-05-2010 at 06:28 PM..
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Old 06-05-2010, 06:39 PM   #28 (permalink)
warrior bodhisattva
 
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So men can't look sexy in fatigues either. Gotcha.
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Knowing that death is certain and that the time of death is uncertain, what's the most important thing?
—Bhikkhuni Pema Chödrön

Humankind cannot bear very much reality.
—From "Burnt Norton," Four Quartets (1936), T. S. Eliot
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Old 06-05-2010, 06:47 PM   #29 (permalink)
I Confess a Shiver
 
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Nah. You're missing the point of this thread.

Guys are allowed to, no, supposed to wear manly stuff (warrior garb) and do manly things (like get dirty, perform physical labor, and kill one another).

Let us remember our traditional 1950s sex/gender roles here.
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Old 06-05-2010, 06:49 PM   #30 (permalink)
warrior bodhisattva
 
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Yo, dude; I'm just tryin' to bust up a stereotype.
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Knowing that death is certain and that the time of death is uncertain, what's the most important thing?
—Bhikkhuni Pema Chödrön

Humankind cannot bear very much reality.
—From "Burnt Norton," Four Quartets (1936), T. S. Eliot
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Old 06-05-2010, 07:02 PM   #31 (permalink)
I Confess a Shiver
 
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Baraka, you defy all manly conventions.
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Old 06-05-2010, 07:34 PM   #32 (permalink)
MSD
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Hektore View Post
A particular rugger from the women's team and I raced on one occasion, and she beat my pants off.
I hope that after that sort of warmup, your pants literally came off.
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Old 06-05-2010, 07:51 PM   #33 (permalink)
Insane
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Plan9 View Post
^

Women can't look sexy in military fatigues.
Amen brother.

Women are too emotional and easily offended. This inevitably leads to them becoming irrational in any sort of prolonged debate or argument.
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Old 06-06-2010, 12:41 AM   #34 (permalink)
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Women can't poke a campfire with a stick properly.
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Old 06-06-2010, 01:53 AM   #35 (permalink)
follower of the child's crusade?
 
women actually have a lower pain threshold than men on average (ie of course Im not saying every man has a higher threshold than every women)

Women also cannot be:

executioners
slaughtermen

If someone finds a rare example, it will almost certainly be the case that that woman was pyschologically male.

The act of killing (while of course a woman can physically enact it) is a male action.

_

We have had quite a long discussion about women committing sex crimes before - I believe a conversation around some girls in an old people's homes where some highjinks and horseplay got a bit out of hand but the state claimed an actual sexual assault had taken place. I am more than happy to discuss it again but maybe it would take over this thread if it was done here.

With the greatest respect - these case noodle mentions is not rape. I have looked up "cock ring" on the internet. The fact that this woman "fitted" on on the male and he didnt climax is a rather different thing from being a rape victim. The only way in which a female could conceivably carry out an act which might be consider rape on a man would be with a dildo. In real life, if this has happened 10 times in the history of humanity I would be shocked.

By definition, the act of a man's penis penetrating a woman cannot in any circumstance whatsoever be called rape by the female. I do not care if someone can quote an article that says it is. It is logically, humanly, factually, impossible. The man is the active participant in such an action and the woman is the passive one.
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hidden will not become manifest, and nothing covered will remain
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Old 06-06-2010, 03:21 AM   #36 (permalink)
Junkie
 
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Location: Greater Harrisburg Area
Quote:
Originally Posted by MSD View Post
I hope that after that sort of warmup, your pants literally came off.
Well, they did, but not because of her....

Quote:
Originally Posted by Strange Famous View Post
By definition, the act of a man's penis penetrating a woman cannot in any circumstance whatsoever be called rape by the female. I do not care if someone can quote an article that says it is. It is logically, humanly, factually, impossible. The man is the active participant in such an action and the woman is the passive one.
Does this hold even if the man is unconscious, and the woman is not?
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Old 06-06-2010, 04:38 AM   #37 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Pearl Trade View Post
Women cannot argue effectively and admit when they're wrong.
I'd argue that this pertains to the entire human race, really. I've met about 3 people who could admit they were wrong, and 2 of them are women.

---------- Post added at 08:38 AM ---------- Previous post was at 08:35 AM ----------

Quote:
Originally Posted by inBOIL View Post
Women can't poke a campfire with a stick properly.
In my house I'm the fire-builder/keeper. And traditionally it was women who kept the hearth fire going.
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Old 06-06-2010, 05:19 AM   #38 (permalink)
follower of the child's crusade?
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hektore View Post
Well, they did, but not because of her....



Does this hold even if the man is unconscious, and the woman is not?
Such a thing is hardly possible, but if it happened it still would not be rape. At worth it would be molestation, but it is such an unlikely occurence I think it is pointless to think about it.
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hidden will not become manifest, and nothing covered will remain
without being uncovered."

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Old 06-06-2010, 05:52 AM   #39 (permalink)
Une petite chou
 
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I respectfully disagree with you, SF, especially since this thread is partially about busting up stereotypes. I have had my man be a completely passive partner where I put his penis inside me and rode him silly. This not being rape, he was completely passive on purpose. In most states, according to research, the gender of the victim and perpetrator has been removed from the legal definition of "rape" because of these very issues and disagreements. This being the last thing I'm going to say about this topic since it has derailed the OP...

Women can't be guaranteed the same salary for the same job
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Quote:
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Just realize that you're armed with smart but heavily outnumbered.
The question isn’t who is going to let me; it’s who is going to stop me. Ayn Rand
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Old 06-06-2010, 06:35 AM   #40 (permalink)
follower of the child's crusade?
 
Women cannot create concentration camps
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hidden will not become manifest, and nothing covered will remain
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