squeeeb

i just got back from a roadtrip. i drove a 2003 honda civic that didn't have a cd player or even a tape player from south of tucson arizona to vernon new jersey, with a stop in philadelphia to visit a freind, then from jersey to bastrop texas (outside austin) then back to arizona. on the return trip, while driving through west by god virginia, i hit a piece of retread on the road and fucked up my transmission, and i was stuck in sutton/flatwoods west virgina for 6 long hellish painful days. i was on interstate's for most of the way.

the following are the thoughts i had along the trip. they are kind of a stream of consiousness, just bits and pieces, ideas and such that came and went like clouds on a windy day. i feel like sharing them. this is what went through my mind while driving.

- you should be allowed to pay an extra $100 a year or something to be allowed to speed on highways. they would give you a chip that goes in your driver's license which registers on a cop's radar gun and when he pings you, it shows you have the "speeding pass" and he ignores you.

- an arena where you drive and shoot each other. it would be murder sports and you could have it at Mcdonald's Murder Speedway.

- maybe cause it was independance day weekend, but i heard grand funk's "american band" 3 times in one day...

- i wish i had someome to talk to.

- hey, ricky bobby, the left lane of an interstate highway is for passing. doing 5 miles over the speed limit does not mean you can just hang out in the left lane. jackass.

- i want a blowjob while driving. not cause it would be exciting, but it seems i'm the only person who has never done that.

- how come there are no drive through chinese restaurants?

- I-79 in west virginia at 1 a.m. is a racetrack! just me and one other guy and we are taking turns at 105 mph. good times.

- flying j truck stops suck ass. the burnt coffee stays hot and undrinkable for 20 minutes, bathrooms are not clean, and they don't have fireballs. pilot and love's are way better.

- the song radar love still kicks ass, and at night kicks even more ass. i heard it twice.

- i want to change the perception of chess. i want chess to be seen as more punk rock, not so nerdy. the game is about war for fuck's sake, it is violent. the game is also artistic. chess, art, and music are all related. you can express yourself violently and artistically in chess. and it's fun dammit. i want chess to have a "Sex, drugs, rock and roll, and chess" kinda reputation.

- the crystal method is excellent to drive to at night.

- hey, shaniqua, i'm not asking you to get to the back of the bus, i'm asking you to get your slow minivan into the right lane. you just passed a sign that says "slower vehicles use right lane." goddamn...

- i love the bible belt south. that is where all the adult superstores are for all your highway porn needs...

- "kentucky has white castle! hey, i should stop and get some!" (20 minutes later) "kentucky has white castle! hey, i should stop and get some!"

- texas rest stops have wireless. cool, i wish i had a computer. i wonder if the others did.

- after driving 110 mph for a while, driving 60 seems so slow.

- damn, the us is huge, and there is a whole lotta space and land.....

__________________
onward to mayhem!

kurty[B]

I see you have the same problem with left lane cruisers as I do. I think the McDonald Murder Highway should be changed to "Get-Out-of-the-Left-Lane-When-Not-Passing-Or-Your-Tires-Will-Be-Shot-Out" Highway.

I got stuck in a small town of 700 people in Wyoming (for Wyoming that's probably a large town). Hit a deer, and ended up there for two weeks waiting for one part to arrive. By the end of the second week I was being invited to speed-boat keggers out on the lake. It sucked being stuck, but I love small towns.

abaya

Yep, it is... and damn, you are making me miss it even more than usual. The most American part of me is the part that LOVES TO DRIVE, fast and far, for days on end. I love the feeling of endlessness on American highways. That's what I'm going to think about today, as the 4th of July passes without incidence while I reside on the tiny-ass rock called Iceland.

__________________
And think not you can direct the course of Love;
for Love, if it finds you worthy, directs your course.
--Khalil Gibran

Borla

As a roadtrip veteran myself, I applaud your list.

__________________
Coimhéad fearg fhear na foighde!!!!