Getting over him? - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

lindalove · 08-18-2006, 09:28 AM

Yeah. This might sound a bit silly, since it never became really more than what I'm gonna say, but I'd really like to figure out a way to get over him.

I've had a crush on a guy for over a year, about a year and a half, as a result of that, I flew to Philidelphia to see him.

What happened was a couple days and nights that was a complete blast. We talked, we hung out, we did more than hang out and kiss.

But we did talk about where things were going, and we both decided nothing more than just friends with benefits.

He lives across the country. Neither of us wants a LD relationship, so it's really better if it's nothing more than a friendship.

However, ever since I visited him, I really can't get him out of my mind. It kinda sucks, because it's affecting what I do and think and whatnots. I'd really like a way to figure it out, and just move on and focus on other things, and just be happy that I'm friends with him.

Any ideas? Suggestions? Have you been in a position like this before, and how did it result?

Sage · 08-18-2006, 11:17 AM

I'll pass on some words that I learned at convocation (is that what they do first? or is it commencement?) my first day at boarding school...

"T.T.T.- Things Take Time!"

Seriously, give it a week. Right now you're all giddy because you got your freak on, which is great, but you're still in that endorphin high of thinking he's just the greatest thing on two legs. Take a deep breath, go back to your daily life, and in a while it won't seem like such a big deal!

Sultana · 08-18-2006, 01:15 PM

Find someone else to focus on. That is the best and fastest way to get over someone. No, it won't be the same. But it can still be fun, and good. And healing.

No-I don't mean a rebound. I mean looking at other people as options, and redirecting your energy. Goodluck, my lindalove.

genuinegirly · 08-18-2006, 04:15 PM

I dunno... I'm just crazy enough to recommend keeping the long distance relationship going. call me a massichist, but if the guy is worth it...

a good little song:

Sand In My Shoes
by Dido

Two weeks away feels like the whole world should have changed
but I'm home now and things still look the same
I think I'll leave it till tomorrow to unpack, try to forget for one more night that I'm back in my flat
on the road where the cars never stop going through the night
to a life where I can't watch the sunset, I don't have time, I don't have time

I've still got sand in my shoes and I can't shake the thought of you
I should get on, forget you but why would I want to
I know we said goodbye, anything else would've been confused
but I want to see you again

tomorrow's back to work and down to sanity
should run a bath and then *clear* up the mess I made before I left here
try to remind myself that I was happy here before I knew that I could get on a plane and fly away
from the road where the cars never stop going through the night
to a life where I can watch the sunset and take my time, take all our time

I've still got sand in my shoes and I can't shake the thought of you
I should get on forget you but why would I want to
I know we said goodbye, anything else would've been confused
but I want to see you again(x2)
I want to see you again

two weeks away, all it takes, to change and turn me around I've fallen
I walked away, and never said, that I wanted to see you again

I've still got sand in my shoes and I can't shake the thought of you
I should get on, forget you but why would I want to
I know we said goodbye, anything else would've been confused
but I want to see you again(x2)

I wanna see you again
I wanna see you again

LLL2 · 08-21-2006, 05:20 PM

Just go meet other guys out there. That's how i get over women that turn me down,or just wants to be friends. I go meet lot more women. Sure half won't call back, but that better then sitting around waiting for something that will never happen and you will be piss at yourself in the future because you wasted your time thinking about this guy , but he's probably with some other chick right now and your posting this stuff. Hmm that was a bit harsh. I guess what i mean is, Don't worry about him. The way i found out how to get over women is to meet new ones. Sure some of them are dumber then the other. But One day i'm going run into that good one.

archpaladin · 08-22-2006, 07:15 PM

In general, what helps me is to have something to keep myself preoccupied. If I'm paying attention to something, I'm not thinking of that other person.

That could be looking for someone else (which does work!) or picking up a hobby, or whatever else you can focus on.

08-18-2006, 09:28 AM	#1 (permalink)
lindalove Registered User	Getting over him? Yeah. This might sound a bit silly, since it never became really more than what I'm gonna say, but I'd really like to figure out a way to get over him. I've had a crush on a guy for over a year, about a year and a half, as a result of that, I flew to Philidelphia to see him. What happened was a couple days and nights that was a complete blast. We talked, we hung out, we did more than hang out and kiss. But we did talk about where things were going, and we both decided nothing more than just friends with benefits. He lives across the country. Neither of us wants a LD relationship, so it's really better if it's nothing more than a friendship. However, ever since I visited him, I really can't get him out of my mind. It kinda sucks, because it's affecting what I do and think and whatnots. I'd really like a way to figure it out, and just move on and focus on other things, and just be happy that I'm friends with him. Any ideas? Suggestions? Have you been in a position like this before, and how did it result?

08-18-2006, 11:17 AM	#2 (permalink)
Sage hoarding all the big girl panties since 2005 Location: North side	I'll pass on some words that I learned at convocation (is that what they do first? or is it commencement?) my first day at boarding school... "T.T.T.- Things Take Time!" Seriously, give it a week. Right now you're all giddy because you got your freak on, which is great, but you're still in that endorphin high of thinking he's just the greatest thing on two legs. Take a deep breath, go back to your daily life, and in a while it won't seem like such a big deal! __________________ Sage knows our mythic history, King Arthur's and Sir Caradoc's She answers hard acrostics, has a pretty taste for paradox She quotes in elegiacs all the crimes of Heliogabalus In conics she can floor peculiarities parabolous -C'hi

08-18-2006, 01:15 PM	#3 (permalink)
Sultana Falling Angel Location: L.A. L.A. land	Find someone else to focus on. That is the best and fastest way to get over someone. No, it won't be the same. But it can still be fun, and good. And healing. No-I don't mean a rebound. I mean looking at other people as options, and redirecting your energy. Goodluck, my lindalove. __________________ "Love is a snowmobile racing across the tundra and then suddenly it flips over, pinning you underneath. At night, the ice weasels come." - Matt Groening My goal? To fulfill my potential.

08-18-2006, 04:15 PM	#4 (permalink)
genuinegirly Eat your vegetables Super Moderator Location: Arabidopsis-ville	I dunno... I'm just crazy enough to recommend keeping the long distance relationship going. call me a massichist, but if the guy is worth it... a good little song: Sand In My Shoes by Dido Two weeks away feels like the whole world should have changed but I'm home now and things still look the same I think I'll leave it till tomorrow to unpack, try to forget for one more night that I'm back in my flat on the road where the cars never stop going through the night to a life where I can't watch the sunset, I don't have time, I don't have time I've still got sand in my shoes and I can't shake the thought of you I should get on, forget you but why would I want to I know we said goodbye, anything else would've been confused but I want to see you again tomorrow's back to work and down to sanity should run a bath and then clear up the mess I made before I left here try to remind myself that I was happy here before I knew that I could get on a plane and fly away from the road where the cars never stop going through the night to a life where I can watch the sunset and take my time, take all our time I've still got sand in my shoes and I can't shake the thought of you I should get on forget you but why would I want to I know we said goodbye, anything else would've been confused but I want to see you again(x2) I want to see you again two weeks away, all it takes, to change and turn me around I've fallen I walked away, and never said, that I wanted to see you again I've still got sand in my shoes and I can't shake the thought of you I should get on, forget you but why would I want to I know we said goodbye, anything else would've been confused but I want to see you again(x2) I wanna see you again I wanna see you again __________________ "Sometimes I have to remember that things are brought to me for a reason, either for my own lessons or for the benefit of others." Cynthetiq "violence is no more or less real than non-violence." roachboy

08-21-2006, 05:20 PM	#5 (permalink)
LLL2 Crazy	Just go meet other guys out there. That's how i get over women that turn me down,or just wants to be friends. I go meet lot more women. Sure half won't call back, but that better then sitting around waiting for something that will never happen and you will be piss at yourself in the future because you wasted your time thinking about this guy , but he's probably with some other chick right now and your posting this stuff. Hmm that was a bit harsh. I guess what i mean is, Don't worry about him. The way i found out how to get over women is to meet new ones. Sure some of them are dumber then the other. But One day i'm going run into that good one. Last edited by LLL2; 08-21-2006 at 05:41 PM.. Reason: Fixing my problems.

08-22-2006, 07:15 PM	#6 (permalink)
archpaladin Crazy	In general, what helps me is to have something to keep myself preoccupied. If I'm paying attention to something, I'm not thinking of that other person. That could be looking for someone else (which does work!) or picking up a hobby, or whatever else you can focus on. __________________ This space not for rent.