Help me with my speech outline - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

emphant · 10-19-2004, 09:56 AM

I was instructed to rewrite it, and I have absolutly no idea why? Could anyone share some insight with me? Thanks.

General Purpose: To inform.

Specific Purpose: To inform the class about Vancouver, Canada.

Organizational Pattern: Monroe’s Motivated Sequence and Spatial order.

I Attention Step

A If there were a place you could go with beautiful scenery, hoppin clubs, aquariums, casinos, festivals, and did I mention the scenery – would you go there?

B Fortunately, there is such a place, and I am proud to say I was lucky enough to visit Vancouver, Canada in March of 2004.

C Today I would like to inform you as to why Vancouver is such an incredible place to visit.

Signpost: Vancouver is a great city for people to have a good time in.

II Need Step

A There are such a wide variety of things to do that anyone can have a good time.

B It doesn’t matter what you like to do, in Vancouver, there is something people from all walks of life can enjoy.

Signpost: You shouldn’t go to Vancouver unless you know some basic things about it.

III Satisfaction Step

A Vancouver is named after a British Naval Captain named George Vancouver, who first explored the area in 1792.

1 The city is located in Western Canada on the Pacific ocean in the province of British Columbia

Originally it was a sawmill settlement called Granville, but was renamed in 1886 after George Vancouver.
The city is home to 560,000 people with over two million living in the suburbs.

B Today, Vancouver is home to a wide variety of industry, with rapidly expanding software, biotechnology, and film companies as well as more traditional mining and forest operations as well.

Vancouver is also home to one of the largest ports in the world.
It is easily said that Vancouver is the industrial center of Western Canada
C

1 Vancouver is located in Western Canada on the Pacific Ocean.

2 On three sides, it is surrounded by the Ocean and is overlooked by the Coast Range Mountains.

D

Vancouver has a remarkably mild climate.
The temperature only ranges from 37 to 64 degrees Fahrenheit .
E

If you need something to do, consider starting with one of the four excellent casinos
If that doesn’t tickle your fancy, try one of the incredible clubs like Barfly of Ozone.
Barfly is a fun time; the bartenders are friendly, the music is pounding, and the people all like to have a good time
If casinos and clubs aren’t your deal, try one of the three theatres or the Opera houses.
The Queen Elizabeth theatre has a wide variety of attractions like Broadway shows, rock concerts, even the occasional telethon.

Signpost: An average night in Vancouver might go something like this

IV Visualization

A As you get in the car, your skin tingles with anticipation. You park, pay the attendant, and then get out and walk to the theatre. As you sit, you can’t help but notice the 70-foot proscenium arch stage. After the play is over, you take a trip to one of the riverboat casinos. The sounds of the casino surround you. The jingling of slot machines, the shouts of gamblers, you can’t help but get excited as the dealer flips over your blackjack. After a few hands, you decide to go to Barfly nightclub. The bass is pounding as you walk in and order a drink. After a moment, you head to the dance floor and start moving.

B After a night like this, you won’t be able to do anything except wish you could go back for more.

Signpost: In conclusion, Vancouver is a great city and I recommend everyone visit at least once.

V Actualization Step:

A Vancouver is a fun and entertaining place to visit.

B There is such a vast array of stuff to do, there is never a dull moment

C I had such a good time in Vancouver that I plan to make it an annual visit. Hopefully everyone else will have as good a time as I did.

cybersharp · 10-19-2004, 09:35 PM

Looks ok to me......be sure to have alot to talk about with each individualized topic though.

mikeylips · 10-26-2004, 10:56 AM

Is this a full sentance outline? If it is it's good, if not then you might not want to use such complete ideas.

Also, I've found that this depends on the teacher but I think in an outline how it is supposed to be is if you have an "A" you have to have a "B", and if you have a "1" you have to have a "2". and so forth. I think there's a couple places where you could add another point in there.

Also, your general purpose is "To Inform" yet you're using the Monroes Motivated Sequence which is used for a persuasive speech. That's at least what I was taught in my speech class this past summer. If your speech is indeed to inform, then I would change the attention, need, visualization, and actualization steps to something else and then make sure that you are only conveying the idea of information to your audience. If you're purspose is to persuade, then make the appropriate changes in your general purpose and make sure that you are trying to convince the audience of something, for example why they should visit Vancouver Canada.

Hope that helps.

10-19-2004, 09:56 AM	#1 (permalink)
emphant Crazy Location: Meeshagain	Help me with my speech outline I was instructed to rewrite it, and I have absolutly no idea why? Could anyone share some insight with me? Thanks. General Purpose: To inform. Specific Purpose: To inform the class about Vancouver, Canada. Organizational Pattern: Monroe’s Motivated Sequence and Spatial order. I Attention Step A If there were a place you could go with beautiful scenery, hoppin clubs, aquariums, casinos, festivals, and did I mention the scenery – would you go there? B Fortunately, there is such a place, and I am proud to say I was lucky enough to visit Vancouver, Canada in March of 2004. C Today I would like to inform you as to why Vancouver is such an incredible place to visit. Signpost: Vancouver is a great city for people to have a good time in. II Need Step A There are such a wide variety of things to do that anyone can have a good time. B It doesn’t matter what you like to do, in Vancouver, there is something people from all walks of life can enjoy. Signpost: You shouldn’t go to Vancouver unless you know some basic things about it. III Satisfaction Step A Vancouver is named after a British Naval Captain named George Vancouver, who first explored the area in 1792. 1 The city is located in Western Canada on the Pacific ocean in the province of British Columbia Originally it was a sawmill settlement called Granville, but was renamed in 1886 after George Vancouver. The city is home to 560,000 people with over two million living in the suburbs. B Today, Vancouver is home to a wide variety of industry, with rapidly expanding software, biotechnology, and film companies as well as more traditional mining and forest operations as well. Vancouver is also home to one of the largest ports in the world. It is easily said that Vancouver is the industrial center of Western Canada C 1 Vancouver is located in Western Canada on the Pacific Ocean. 2 On three sides, it is surrounded by the Ocean and is overlooked by the Coast Range Mountains. D Vancouver has a remarkably mild climate. The temperature only ranges from 37 to 64 degrees Fahrenheit . E If you need something to do, consider starting with one of the four excellent casinos If that doesn’t tickle your fancy, try one of the incredible clubs like Barfly of Ozone. Barfly is a fun time; the bartenders are friendly, the music is pounding, and the people all like to have a good time If casinos and clubs aren’t your deal, try one of the three theatres or the Opera houses. The Queen Elizabeth theatre has a wide variety of attractions like Broadway shows, rock concerts, even the occasional telethon. Signpost: An average night in Vancouver might go something like this IV Visualization A As you get in the car, your skin tingles with anticipation. You park, pay the attendant, and then get out and walk to the theatre. As you sit, you can’t help but notice the 70-foot proscenium arch stage. After the play is over, you take a trip to one of the riverboat casinos. The sounds of the casino surround you. The jingling of slot machines, the shouts of gamblers, you can’t help but get excited as the dealer flips over your blackjack. After a few hands, you decide to go to Barfly nightclub. The bass is pounding as you walk in and order a drink. After a moment, you head to the dance floor and start moving. B After a night like this, you won’t be able to do anything except wish you could go back for more. Signpost: In conclusion, Vancouver is a great city and I recommend everyone visit at least once. V Actualization Step: A Vancouver is a fun and entertaining place to visit. B There is such a vast array of stuff to do, there is never a dull moment C I had such a good time in Vancouver that I plan to make it an annual visit. Hopefully everyone else will have as good a time as I did.

10-19-2004, 09:35 PM	#2 (permalink)
cybersharp Insane	Looks ok to me......be sure to have alot to talk about with each individualized topic though. __________________ 0PtIcAl

10-26-2004, 10:56 AM	#3 (permalink)
mikeylips Crazy	Is this a full sentance outline? If it is it's good, if not then you might not want to use such complete ideas. Also, I've found that this depends on the teacher but I think in an outline how it is supposed to be is if you have an "A" you have to have a "B", and if you have a "1" you have to have a "2". and so forth. I think there's a couple places where you could add another point in there. Also, your general purpose is "To Inform" yet you're using the Monroes Motivated Sequence which is used for a persuasive speech. That's at least what I was taught in my speech class this past summer. If your speech is indeed to inform, then I would change the attention, need, visualization, and actualization steps to something else and then make sure that you are only conveying the idea of information to your audience. If you're purspose is to persuade, then make the appropriate changes in your general purpose and make sure that you are trying to convince the audience of something, for example why they should visit Vancouver Canada. Hope that helps.