Un-Squeak a noisy wooden bed?
 

ok, perhaps some of you handy men (or women ;) ) can help me figure out how to do this.

the bed's all wood, the matresses rest on wooden slats.
(it's a european bed, so it's built a lil differently than what most of you are used to) there's prolly about 20 slats on each side (double bed, 2 twinnish-sized matresses on each side, and underneath is the slats that hold matresses up, each side is in a separate frame, which then rests in the bed frame.

anyways, it squeaks. which gets to be a bit too distracting/annoying during sex :p

so any ideas? i'm thinking, soemthing to lubricate the pieces of wood where they meet together? i dunno.

any help is appreciated :)

lub it up...

Try some regular cooking oil.

Cute problem :D

The thing with wood is that its difficult to lubricate. First, you should find the point of squeaking. push down on the mattresses and try to find where the sound comes from. It is possible that there's a metal/composite joint somewhere between the wooden pieces. Then you just take some general lubricant (check your hardware store)...and spray it there.

Squeaking means that 2 different materials, or 1 springy material, are being squeezed. Is it possible that your mattresses are squeaky? Mattress springs often make squeaky noises. Try a different mattress.

Lastly, remove your mattresses. Check all wooden joints...make sure all the screws and bolts are tightened well. A loose wood plank can cause the squeaking too.

Hope that somewhat helps.

I wouldn't use oil, especially cooking oil. It goes rancid and it will harden like glue over time.

Simplest fix is still lubrication, but use a block of parafin. rub it onto the places where you think it's squeaking. Should last a long time too.

Mtsg is right about the oil. Oil is easier cause you won't have to separate the joints to work it in there, but can ruin the wood. Also check out the hardware store for a spray that is used for wooden drawers. You could put that where the wood meets. Tighten everything up so it doesn't move as much and you should be set.

Go to a local hardware store, not a box store like home depot, and talk to one of the old guys that works in isles. They'll show you 15 ways to fix anything!

Guess what that spray is... :)

mtsgsd is right! A candle will work too, they are usually parafin....
Best way to really kill the problem is to take the bed to pieces as much as possible, and then re-assemble, rubbing copious amounts of wax on ALL contact points as you go. Good Luck!

I vote for tightening up any screws/bolts.
We have a cheap, fold-out futon platform that I put legs on, and I have to periodically go around and tighten up all the screws. Quiets it right up.

I am all for the tightening of all screws and joints. Lubricating wood is hard to do. Wood has a high coefficient of friction and on top of that it tends to soak up the oil you apply. Truly the best thing you can is to tighten all screws. If it is nails and you feel like doing a big project, replace all the nails with screws. Nails tend to make their holes bigger over time, especially is furniture and walls.
Another reason lubricating the joints won't do much good is beause if you lkubricate them, you're encouraging the slabs of wood to rub together. Eventually you're gonna be jumping up and down on the bed and the lubrication may have prevented squeaking, but it's just gonna fall right apart on ya, and then you'll need a new bed.

The best and simplest way to take the squeaks out of wood is use beeswax. It works quite well on squeaky drawers and the like, however, making a creaky old bed less noisy during some serious "jostling about" is dubious. Good luck.

My own creaky bed drives me crazy too! I have tried all of the above but I think the design is inherently flawed - nothing adequately fixes the problem!

You may need a new bed - or try the floor!!!

Beewax works too, but the point behind parafin is that it's harder, and lasts longer. It's what is normaly used on wooden drawer slides.

No argument on tightening everything up, that goes without saying. I'm assuming the slats on her bed are similar to one I used to have in that they are not screwed down.

I had the same problem with my (self-made) bed.

My solution was to get some 14 gauge wire, and string it up caty-corner under the bed, and then tighten it using one of those wierd thingy's that you can get at a hardware store. Doing this holds the bed together tightly, preventing movement, and thus squeaking.

Oh, the wierd thingy had 2 eye hooks, and an aluminum body that pulled the hooks closer together when twisted. I also used four or five loops of wire for strength.

Good luck.

turnbuckle. :)

heh. thanks for the advises so far, guys.

i'm gonna go tighten all the screws inna bit, as it seems to mostly come from the 4 corners of the bed, where the head/footboards are attatched to the hm, side/base boards via metal brackety-thingies and screws.

(god i sure sound like a girl, eh? :p )

upon closer inspection, i see the slats UNDER the matresses have no metal parts, it's just the slats inserted in the slat-frame with a little hard plastic 'sock' in between them.

i'll get back to ya on the status soon as i finish poking at it. :)

Try Baby Powder or Talcum powder on some squeeks it works as good temp fix for a quickie!