mjby2

Two friends, a blonde and a redhead, are walking down the street and
pass a flower shop where the redhead happens to see her boyfriend buying
flowers. She sighs and says: "Oh, crap, my boyfriend is buying me flowers
again."

The blonde looks quizzically at her and says," You don't like getting
flowers? "The redhead says: "I love getting flowers, but he always has
expectations after giving me flowers, and I just don't feel like spending
the next three days on my back with my legs in the air."

The blonde says, "Don't you have a vase?"

Toaster126

Wow. I wasn't expecting that. Good work.

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"The question isn't who is going to let me, it's who is going to stop me." (Ayn Rand)
"The truth is that our finest moments are most likely to occur when we are feeling deeply uncomfortable, unhappy, or unfulfilled. For it is only in such moments, propelled by our discomfort, that we are likely to step out of our ruts and start searching for different ways or truer answers." (M. Scott Peck)

Redlemon

There's a mental image that will stick with me.

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I can't read your signature. Sorry.

SirLance

Oh, man. Good one. Maybe we need a blonde jokes sticky...

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joeshoe

Haha, I thought "two friends, a blonde, and a redhead are walking down the street" meant four people walking together. I spent half a minute thinking, "what about the other two friends?"

Gnzo

hahaha, that was good, didn't see that one at all.

leftyderek

Aye flowers in the...

Haah actually I found it funny just because it's so weird

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-Imagine how beautiful the world would be if we could only do things for the first-and-last time. Imagine this is the last time you would ever be able to imagine. Imagine that.

-Die Lust der Zerstörung ist gleichzeitig eine schaffende Lust.

-...and god said
Lx1,go!
and there was light...

shadowfiend

I've actually read about 3197631964214453251 different versions of that.