more from somethingawful - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

redrum · 06-02-2003, 08:11 PM

PiKe - are you on? "because today you do not have n/a"
Lowtax - yes
PiKe - oh ok i heard you where a good hacker?
Lowtax - Oh yeah, I'm SUP4H L33T
PiKe - what does that mean?
Lowtax - It's secret haX0r code faG0t!!!
PiKe - ok well ive been told you can help me
Lowtax - Y3S, MY chILD?
PiKe - ya i need to know how do get into someones comp using their ip# and stuff and like get stuff or something
Lowtax - Do you use Service condition release pak 12-C or the alt. release?
PiKe - ya ummm what?
Lowtax - What operating system are you using?
PiKe - oh, windows 98
Lowtax - So what release client / host TCP protocol do you have installed?
Lowtax - What kind of hacking have you done in the past? I need to know so I can determine what skill level you're on.
PiKe - not realy ANYTHING i have lots of hacking programs but most of them don't work but i know what phreaking, hacking, cracking are ive read up a little
Lowtax - Have you done any work with the Pusherbot v2.1 client hack prog?
PiKe - nope
Lowtax - What about a basic Shoverbot? These programs force fake data packets through a false TMCPT server and reroute the service modules for outgoing packets which can screw up their net connection
PiKe - no like i said all ive done is read up a little and downloaded a few stuff
Lowtax - Oh, okay. Well, what stuff would you like to do? Basic thermal-packet deregulation? IMPCTCP rerouting? Seismic tosses? Hard-boot fixes?
PiKe - ya what? ok i don't want to dammage anything i just wan't to get in and look around a bit and maby bug em a little
Lowtax - OK, so you want to do some level three MoFos access stuff? Poking around the hard drive, maybe rename a few files, and look at stuff?
PiKe - ya and get stuff from them too like a ftp or something
Lowtax - Ok, sounds like a level 4 MoFos / Pusherbot access thing. How much experience do you have with client-side C++ dll modules?
PiKe - probably none im going to be a hard one
PiKe - in the meanwile check out my page for a game "starcraft" www.angelfire.com/sc2/planetstarcraft ive programed it all using only html and javascript
Lowtax - Have you ever used any vector based rudimentary Ziggy666 scripts?
Lowtax - Oh, that's great. I wrote a crack for Starcraft that allows you to import the characters from Duke Nukem.
PiKe - cool
Lowtax - I also cracked Duke Nukem to allow people playing Starcraft to join in. Ever download that before?
PiKe - nope i have not got any starcraft cracks only diablo
Lowtax - I wrote a Diablo crack under the name "l33tw4r3zh4X0r" that turns it into Zelda. Have you seen that? If you press every keyboard key at the same time, you also get some credit card numbers.
PiKe - cool nope net herd of it i have bobba fetts hacking prog for it and i have like all the items
Lowtax - My friend helped work on that. Do you know Jeff K.?
PiKe - nope
Lowtax - Hmmm, okay. What were we talking about again? I'm sorry, I'm nuking a couple people in Mexico who were trying to break into my FTP server
PiKe - oh ok i need to know how to get into someones comp and stuff
Lowtax - Oh yeah, sorry. What net connection do you have?
PiKe - 56k
Lowtax - Do you live in Idaho?
PiKe - ya why?
Lowtax - Just running a few diagnostics on your Internet connection. I'm using the hack program I made.
Lowtax - OK, what's your target bitrate conversion factor?
PiKe - so why arn't you on verry oftian?
Lowtax - I cycle through accounts so the FBI can't get me
PiKe - oh ok ok now what was that about targets and stuff
Lowtax - What's the target's TCPIP UIN RAMBUS code?
PiKe - TCPIP UIN RAMBUS code? now what? the ip#?
Lowtax - No, dynamic IPs are worthless unless we're talking about static variables. What allocation host is the target on? A Win Proxy component? Fornication Allocation? What about the flipback switch?
PiKe - what are you talking about rember novic
Lowtax - Sorry, it's hard to explain this in novice terms for me, I've been haX0ring ever since I got my first Renaldo NR-2 Diametric System in 1982
PiKe - ok?
Lowtax - Alrighty, go into your computer properties and tell me what OS revision you're using, complete with the encoded serial number so I can get the right software to you
PiKe - ? os cearial code?
Lowtax - Yeah. First thing you gotta do is unplug your modem connection from your wall though, else it will give you false info. Unplug your modem cable from the wall really quickly, go into START - > SETTINGS -> CONTROL PANEL -> SYSTEM and look up the UIN MOFOS setting. You can only do it when the modem isn't connected, or else it will give you a false reading.
PiKe - im looking in system properties and i can't find "unimofos"
Lowtax - Did you unplug the modem connection from the wall? It won't show up unless you do that.
PiKe - where does it show up at in what section
Lowtax - Where I told you, in Control Panel. It shows up as an icon when you're not plugged in.
PiKe - ok? brb
(OFFLINE FOR 3 MINUTES)
PiKe - i did not see a unimofos
Lowtax - You must be running an older version of Windows 98. The newer, SSI /I UIN AIM PAKCHOOIE version supports MoFos, the older one doesn't. Hmmm, this makes it more difficult to get you up and running since you don't have much experience hacking like I do
PiKe - ya the old one
PiKe - but why do i have to have my unimofos
Lowtax - It makes it alot easier to secure a SLIP/NOTCH connection to an unprotected client vortex / voxel module. What about YOUARES / TUPID? Do you have that installed? It should've come with a Win98 auto-download patch.
PiKe - i don't know this windows is a copy of the first v.
Lowtax - Oh, okay. Shit, somebody just pinged my winnuke, I gotta cycle accounts. ICQ me next time I'm available, ok?
PiKe - why oh come on find my on your next account
Lowtax - SHIT THE LEAGUE OF WOMEN VOTERS IS TRYING TO HAXoR ME

opentocomments · 06-02-2003, 09:35 PM

lol no comments this is funny shit that only us nerds would get

oblar · 06-02-2003, 09:46 PM

hehe it made me chuckle...

I just read a simulated "hack" earlier today and suffice to say I was surprised at how silly the person hacking was... constantly having to rerun commands because he had no clue on syntax even after getting it running once..

then constantly forgetting the pwd... was a bit humorous.

redrum · 06-02-2003, 10:28 PM

best part

Lowtax - It makes it alot easier to secure a SLIP/NOTCH connection to an unprotected client vortex / voxel module. What about YOUARES / TUPID? Do you have that installed? It should've come with a Win98 auto-download patch

jwoody · 06-03-2003, 05:59 AM

I hope I never find this stuff funny.

nash · 06-03-2003, 09:15 AM

chuckle

JStrider · 06-03-2003, 10:03 AM

lol... good stuff...

im gonna go see if i have YOUARES/TUPID installed right now :P

Flesh · 06-04-2003, 05:29 PM

hahahaha, oh man. some people are so fucking slow.

morlock · 06-05-2003, 01:31 AM

*chuckle*

Raw Kuts · 06-05-2003, 06:28 PM

God that was great... I didn't think so much bullshit could come from one person.

THE MAC GOD · 06-06-2003, 02:10 PM

Always been a fan of SA.com... articles like these crack me up... its amazing how gullible some people are...

06-02-2003, 08:11 PM	#1 (permalink)
redrum Crazy	more from somethingawful PiKe - are you on? "because today you do not have n/a" Lowtax - yes PiKe - oh ok i heard you where a good hacker? Lowtax - Oh yeah, I'm SUP4H L33T PiKe - what does that mean? Lowtax - It's secret haX0r code faG0t!!! PiKe - ok well ive been told you can help me Lowtax - Y3S, MY chILD? PiKe - ya i need to know how do get into someones comp using their ip# and stuff and like get stuff or something Lowtax - Do you use Service condition release pak 12-C or the alt. release? PiKe - ya ummm what? Lowtax - What operating system are you using? PiKe - oh, windows 98 Lowtax - So what release client / host TCP protocol do you have installed? Lowtax - What kind of hacking have you done in the past? I need to know so I can determine what skill level you're on. PiKe - not realy ANYTHING i have lots of hacking programs but most of them don't work but i know what phreaking, hacking, cracking are ive read up a little Lowtax - Have you done any work with the Pusherbot v2.1 client hack prog? PiKe - nope Lowtax - What about a basic Shoverbot? These programs force fake data packets through a false TMCPT server and reroute the service modules for outgoing packets which can screw up their net connection PiKe - no like i said all ive done is read up a little and downloaded a few stuff Lowtax - Oh, okay. Well, what stuff would you like to do? Basic thermal-packet deregulation? IMPCTCP rerouting? Seismic tosses? Hard-boot fixes? PiKe - ya what? ok i don't want to dammage anything i just wan't to get in and look around a bit and maby bug em a little Lowtax - OK, so you want to do some level three MoFos access stuff? Poking around the hard drive, maybe rename a few files, and look at stuff? PiKe - ya and get stuff from them too like a ftp or something Lowtax - Ok, sounds like a level 4 MoFos / Pusherbot access thing. How much experience do you have with client-side C++ dll modules? PiKe - probably none im going to be a hard one PiKe - in the meanwile check out my page for a game "starcraft" www.angelfire.com/sc2/planetstarcraft ive programed it all using only html and javascript Lowtax - Have you ever used any vector based rudimentary Ziggy666 scripts? Lowtax - Oh, that's great. I wrote a crack for Starcraft that allows you to import the characters from Duke Nukem. PiKe - cool Lowtax - I also cracked Duke Nukem to allow people playing Starcraft to join in. Ever download that before? PiKe - nope i have not got any starcraft cracks only diablo Lowtax - I wrote a Diablo crack under the name "l33tw4r3zh4X0r" that turns it into Zelda. Have you seen that? If you press every keyboard key at the same time, you also get some credit card numbers. PiKe - cool nope net herd of it i have bobba fetts hacking prog for it and i have like all the items Lowtax - My friend helped work on that. Do you know Jeff K.? PiKe - nope Lowtax - Hmmm, okay. What were we talking about again? I'm sorry, I'm nuking a couple people in Mexico who were trying to break into my FTP server PiKe - oh ok i need to know how to get into someones comp and stuff Lowtax - Oh yeah, sorry. What net connection do you have? PiKe - 56k Lowtax - Do you live in Idaho? PiKe - ya why? Lowtax - Just running a few diagnostics on your Internet connection. I'm using the hack program I made. Lowtax - OK, what's your target bitrate conversion factor? PiKe - so why arn't you on verry oftian? Lowtax - I cycle through accounts so the FBI can't get me PiKe - oh ok ok now what was that about targets and stuff Lowtax - What's the target's TCPIP UIN RAMBUS code? PiKe - TCPIP UIN RAMBUS code? now what? the ip#? Lowtax - No, dynamic IPs are worthless unless we're talking about static variables. What allocation host is the target on? A Win Proxy component? Fornication Allocation? What about the flipback switch? PiKe - what are you talking about rember novic Lowtax - Sorry, it's hard to explain this in novice terms for me, I've been haX0ring ever since I got my first Renaldo NR-2 Diametric System in 1982 PiKe - ok? Lowtax - Alrighty, go into your computer properties and tell me what OS revision you're using, complete with the encoded serial number so I can get the right software to you PiKe - ? os cearial code? Lowtax - Yeah. First thing you gotta do is unplug your modem connection from your wall though, else it will give you false info. Unplug your modem cable from the wall really quickly, go into START - > SETTINGS -> CONTROL PANEL -> SYSTEM and look up the UIN MOFOS setting. You can only do it when the modem isn't connected, or else it will give you a false reading. PiKe - im looking in system properties and i can't find "unimofos" Lowtax - Did you unplug the modem connection from the wall? It won't show up unless you do that. PiKe - where does it show up at in what section Lowtax - Where I told you, in Control Panel. It shows up as an icon when you're not plugged in. PiKe - ok? brb (OFFLINE FOR 3 MINUTES) PiKe - i did not see a unimofos Lowtax - You must be running an older version of Windows 98. The newer, SSI /I UIN AIM PAKCHOOIE version supports MoFos, the older one doesn't. Hmmm, this makes it more difficult to get you up and running since you don't have much experience hacking like I do PiKe - ya the old one PiKe - but why do i have to have my unimofos Lowtax - It makes it alot easier to secure a SLIP/NOTCH connection to an unprotected client vortex / voxel module. What about YOUARES / TUPID? Do you have that installed? It should've come with a Win98 auto-download patch. PiKe - i don't know this windows is a copy of the first v. Lowtax - Oh, okay. Shit, somebody just pinged my winnuke, I gotta cycle accounts. ICQ me next time I'm available, ok? PiKe - why oh come on find my on your next account Lowtax - SHIT THE LEAGUE OF WOMEN VOTERS IS TRYING TO HAXoR ME

06-02-2003, 09:35 PM	#2 (permalink)
opentocomments Psycho Location: St. Louis	lol no comments this is funny shit that only us nerds would get __________________ How do we know that the sky is not green and we are all color-blind?

06-02-2003, 09:46 PM	#3 (permalink)
oblar Über-Rookie Location: No longer, D.C	hehe it made me chuckle... I just read a simulated "hack" earlier today and suffice to say I was surprised at how silly the person hacking was... constantly having to rerun commands because he had no clue on syntax even after getting it running once.. then constantly forgetting the pwd... was a bit humorous. __________________ "All that we can do is just survive. .All that we can do to help ourselves is stay alive." - Rush

06-02-2003, 10:28 PM	#4 (permalink)
redrum Crazy	best part Lowtax - It makes it alot easier to secure a SLIP/NOTCH connection to an unprotected client vortex / voxel module. What about YOUARES / TUPID? Do you have that installed? It should've come with a Win98 auto-download patch __________________ "you say erb....we say herb.....because theres a fucking H in it"

06-03-2003, 05:59 AM	#5 (permalink)
jwoody Shackle Me Not Location: Newcastle - England.	I hope I never find this stuff funny. __________________ .

06-03-2003, 10:03 AM	#7 (permalink)
JStrider Poo-tee-weet? Location: The Woodlands, TX	lol... good stuff... im gonna go see if i have YOUARES/TUPID installed right now :P __________________ -=JStrider=- ~Clatto Verata Nicto

06-04-2003, 05:29 PM	#8 (permalink)
Flesh Psycho	hahahaha, oh man. some people are so fucking slow.

06-05-2003, 01:31 AM	#9 (permalink)
morlock Loser	chuckle

06-05-2003, 06:28 PM	#10 (permalink)
Raw Kuts Insane Location: San Diego, CA	God that was great... I didn't think so much bullshit could come from one person. __________________ ( o< --!"Take that bass out you're voice, you talk to me in treble." / / \ \/_/_ -->Mos Def

06-06-2003, 02:10 PM	#11 (permalink)
THE MAC GOD Insane Location: In front of my keyboard.	Always been a fan of SA.com... articles like these crack me up... its amazing how gullible some people are... __________________ Why continue fighting? Is it for Love? Illusions. All as artificial as the Matrix itself, although only a human mind could invent something as insipid as Love.