Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community  

Go Back   Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community > Interests > Tilted Humor


 
 
LinkBack Thread Tools
Old 10-10-2005, 12:09 PM   #1 (permalink)
Junkie
 
SirLance's Avatar
 
Location: In the middle of the desert.
The Poodle and the Leopard

A wealthy old lady decides to go on a photo safari in Africa, taking her faithful aged poodle, named Cuddles, along for the company. One day the poodle starts chasing butterflies and before long, Cuddles discovers that she's lost. Wandering about, she notices a leopard heading rapidly in her direction with the intention of having lunch.

The old poodle thinks, "Oh, oh! I'm in deep doo-doo now!" Noticing some bones on the ground close by, she immediately settles down to chew on the bones with her back to the approaching cat. Just as the leopard is about to leap, the old poodle exclaims loudly, "Boy, that was one delicious leopard! I wonder if there are any more around here?"

Hearing this, the young leopard halts his attack in mid-strike, a look of terror comes over him and he slinks away into the trees. "Whew!" says the leopard, "That was close! That old poodle nearly had me!" Meanwhile, a monkey who had been watching the whole scene from a nearby tree, figures he can put this knowledge to good use and trade it for protection from the leopard. So off he goes, but the old poodle sees him heading after the leopard with great speed, and figures that something must be up. The monkey soon catches up with the leopard, spills the beans and strikes a deal for himself with the leopard.

The young leopard is furious at being made a fool of by the poodle and says, "Here, monkey, hop on my back and see what's going to happen to that conniving canine!"

Now, the old poodle sees the leopard coming with the monkey on his back and thinks, "What am I going to do now?" But instead of running, the dog sits down with her back to her attackers, pretending she hasn't seen them yet, and just when they get close enough to hear, the old poodle says, "Where's that damn monkey? I sent him off an hour ago to bring me another leopard!"

Moral of this story..

Don't mess with old farts...age and treachery will always overcome youth and skill! Bullshit and brilliance only come with age and experience!
__________________
DEMOCRACY is where your vote counts, FEUDALISM is where your count votes.
SirLance is offline  
Old 10-10-2005, 04:32 PM   #2 (permalink)
is a tiger
 
Siege's Avatar
 
Location: Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Haha!!! This one is excellent!
__________________
"Your name's Geek? Do you know the origin of the term? A geek is someone who bites the heads off chickens at a circus. I would never let you suck my dick with a name like Geek"

--Kevin Smith

This part just makes my posts easier to find
Siege is offline  
Old 10-10-2005, 05:21 PM   #3 (permalink)
Psycho
 
albania's Avatar
 
that poodle was crazy, crazy like a fox! no really... crafty poodle.
albania is offline  
Old 10-11-2005, 05:12 AM   #4 (permalink)
Psycho
 
zaiaz's Avatar
 
Location: State of confusion...wait that's medication.
I've never seen a talking poodle before, or and intelligent one. the one I have is spoiled and lazy.
__________________
Self destruction - "Its my Nature", said the Scorpion...
zaiaz is offline  
Old 10-12-2005, 09:24 AM   #5 (permalink)
Insane
 
crazy like a fox is right!
fizzledorf is offline  
Old 10-28-2005, 06:23 PM   #6 (permalink)
ClerkMan!
 
BBtB's Avatar
 
Location: Tulsa, Ok.
Quote:
Originally Posted by zaiaz
I've never seen a talking poodle before
Yea that was my first thought.... but maybe I am just bad at jokes.
__________________
Meridae'n once played "death" at a game of chess that lasted for over two years. He finally beat death in a best 34 out of 67 match. At that time he could ask for any one thing and he could wish for the hope of all mankind... he looked death right in the eye and said ...

"I would like about three fiddy"
BBtB is offline  
Old 10-28-2005, 06:38 PM   #7 (permalink)
Banned
 
Zeraph's Avatar
 
Location: The Cosmos
Clever like a fox is right. Nice one
Zeraph is offline  
Old 10-28-2005, 08:10 PM   #8 (permalink)
Upright
 
Nice New twist on an old moral tale, I think I've heard something similar before but can't place it...
corpheous is offline  
Old 10-28-2005, 10:38 PM   #9 (permalink)
lascivious
 
Mantus's Avatar
 
That was a very good joke
Mantus is offline  
Old 10-28-2005, 11:00 PM   #10 (permalink)
Insane
 
Dragonknight's Avatar
 
Location: Hawaii
Outstanding... that was pretty good. I'll have to try that one day. LOL
Dragonknight is offline  
 

Tags
leopard, poodle


Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On



All times are GMT -8. The time now is 11:03 PM.

Tilted Forum Project

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.6.0 PL2
© 2002-2012 Tilted Forum Project

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60 61 62 63 64 65 66 67 68 69 70 71 72 73 74 75 76 77 78 79 80 81 82 83 84 85 86 87 88 89 90 91 92 93 94 95 96 97 98 99 100 101 102 103 104 105 106 107 108 109 110 111 112 113 114 115 116 117 118 119 120 121 122 123 124 125 126 127 128 129 130 131 132 133 134 135 136 137 138 139 140 141 142 143 144 145 146 147 148 149 150 151 152 153 154 155 156 157 158 159 160 161 162 163 164 165 166 167 168 169 170 171 172 173 174 175 176 177 178 179 180 181 182 183 184 185 186 187 188 189 190 191 192 193 194 195 196 197 198 199 200 201 202 203 204 205 206 207 208 209 210 211 212 213 214 215 216 217 218 219 220 221 222 223 224 225 226 227 228 229 230 231 232 233 234 235 236 237 238 239 240 241 242 243 244 245 246 247 248 249 250 251 252 253 254 255 256 257 258 259 260 261 262 263 264 265 266 267 268 269 270 271 272 273 274 275 276 277 278 279 280 281 282 283 284 285 286 287 288 289 290 291 292 293 294 295 296 297 298 299 300 301 302 303 304 305 306 307 308 309 310 311 312 313 314 315 316 317 318 319 320 321 322 323 324 325 326 327 328 329 330 331 332 333 334 335 336 337 338 339 340 341 342 343 344 345 346 347 348 349 350 351 352 353 354 355 356 357 358 359 360