LoganSnake

I need your help with a sensitive issue. The other night I was at this totally cool bar I've never been to before, called the Manhole. It was a fun place, lots of dancing. Sad thing was there weren't any chicks there. I think it was the same night Oprah had some TV special or something, so there was just mostly guys there. Anyway, I was sitting at the bar and this guy named Lance Dixon came up to me and we started chatting. Lance was cool and we talked about stuff, mostly flower arranging and fashion designing, stuff I don't know much about but Lance was really into. Sometimes it's good to learn new things, I guess. Lance was even nice enough to buy me some drinks. Lance told me he liked subs. I like subs, too, especially from Subway. He had to get going, as he had an early flight the next day (he's a flight attendant). He gave me his number and said we could get together some time. Sounded cool, always good to have friends.

Well, we've been hanging out a lot lately. For example, the other day, Lance and I went to the gym and we were working out. It was a gym I had never been to before. All the guys in there were working out without their shirts on. Lance said it was cool, so we both took our shirts off and started pumping iron. Somebody should tell those dudes that you need to wear shorts over your jockstraps, though. I wonder what the women who work out there do? I didn't see any, but maybe next time I will.

Then, Lance called me and said he needed somewhere to stay, since his apartment was getting fumed for bugs. I said he could stay with me. Why not? Lance is cool. It was crowded on the bed with both of us, but I understand why Lance didn't want to sleep on the couch. After all, it's bumpy and kind of short for him. The next morning, I have to admit feeling a bit weird. My jaw was sore and I had the worst taste in my mouth. Lance said it was from all those protein shakes we'd been drinking since we started working out. In fact, he told me that he gave me a protein shake in the middle of the night. Apparently, I woke up and was thirsty, so he got one for me. Nice guy, huh! He said I gobbled it right down.

Anyway, Lance is coming over today to hang out. He's got a movie he wants to watch and his DVD is broken. He said it's called Kansas City Meat. Must be about farming and cattle and stuff like that. Never heard of it, but it sounds cool. He said there is a really great african-american actor in it, T-Bone. What a crazy name! He must be one of those rappers!

The thing I'm worried about is that Lance told me that anyone who doesn't like the movie would be pwned. Does that sound gay to you?

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Maturity is knowing you were an idiot in the past. Wisdom is knowing that you'll be an idiot in the future. Common sense is knowing that you should try not to be an idiot now. - J. Jacques