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Old 02-14-2005, 01:41 AM   #1 (permalink)
Insane
 
I'm 47

A woman decides to have a facelift for her birthday. She spends $5000, has the surgery,
and is very satisfied with the results.

On her first day out, she stops at a newsstand to buy a newspaper.
Before leaving she says to the clerk,
"I hope you don't mind my asking, but how old do you think I am?"

"About 32," is the reply. "I'm exactly 47," the woman says happily.

A little while later she goes into McDonald's and asks the counter girl
the very same question. She replies, "I guess about 29."

"Nope, I'm 47."

Now, she's feeling really good about herself. She stops in a drug store
on her way down the street. She goes up to the counter to get some mints and
asks the clerk this burning question.

The clerk responds, "Oh, I'd say 30."

Again she proudly responds, "I am 47, but, thank you."

While waiting for the bus to go home, she asks an old man the same question.

He replies, "Lady, I'm 78 and my eye sight is going. Although, when I was young,
there was a sure way to tell how old a woman was. It sounds very forward,
but it requires you to let me put my hands under your bra. Then I can tell you exactly how old you are."

They wait in silence on the empty street until curiosity gets the best of her.
She finally blurts out, "What the heck, go ahead."

He slips both of his hands under her blouse and under her bra and
begins to feel around very slowly and carefully.

After a couple of minutes of this, she says, "Okay, okay,...how old am I?"

He completes one last squeeze of her breasts, removes his hands, and says,

"Madam, you are 47."

Stunned and amazed, the woman says, "That was incredible, how could you tell?"

The old man replies, "Promise you won't get mad?"

"No, I won't get mad", she says.

He replies, "I was behind you in line at McDonald's."

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Old 02-14-2005, 11:42 AM   #2 (permalink)
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Location: Kingston,Ontario
That joke was just as good the second time I read it here!
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Old 02-14-2005, 03:33 PM   #3 (permalink)
Junkie
 
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Location: In the middle of the desert.
Hey, that's a great idea...!
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Old 02-15-2005, 07:33 AM   #4 (permalink)
Insane
 
Location: Missouri
That is a winner. Saving to memory.
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Old 02-16-2005, 10:25 PM   #5 (permalink)
Junkie
 
haha, what a clever guy
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Old 02-17-2005, 10:13 AM   #6 (permalink)
"Without the fuzz"
 
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Location: ..too close for comfort..
lol thats great
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Old 02-18-2005, 08:52 AM   #7 (permalink)
Wookie
 
Location: Howdy from Oklahoma
Very good one. I will pass it on.
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