Actually the majority of the really funny quotes didn't come from this war at all, a lot of them are from the past.

Unfortunately for France, they have been bashed in the US for far longer than President Bush has been in the White House, and it was "cool" then too. Countries and the people in them will take pride in their strong points. For the US, one of those is a strong military tradition. I don't know enough about France to say what their's would be, but feel free to enlighten me (in another forum, unless it's funny). But the gross overreaction by folks on both sides of the pond is pretty funny to watch. Have your sense of humor primed before you come in here.

Obviously you don't have anything better to do- you managed to get even more offended by what I thought. And to be honest, I was actually specifically refering to intolerant Americans, who are usually the easiest offended. But I'm glad to learn from you that the French don't bash America. I'm sure you don't feel superior to all Americans (because of your friends and GF), just the ones who disagree with you- because of their closemindedness, right? I'm just wanting to make sure I'm getting it straight. Because your posts to this point have been pretty condescending "Well you see the thing is..."

I'm not saying I've been overly polite, but you seem pretty upset that I might have accused you of being closedminded yourself and intolerant of others' views...and I've noticed that whenever that comes up, your response has been "I don't see your point". My point is you've chastised me for what YOU'VE thought I think, thereby making yourself guilty of intolerance. But I guess that's just "reflecting my closedmindedness" again. You don't know me, remember that- you know nothing of me, my background, or experience, so you might want to think again about accusing me of being closemined, simply because I'm American and I like jokes...now who's being offensive...

For the record, I never refferred to a "cafe", that was you- I was very specific when I used the phrase "coffee shop"...and as far as "gitanes" go, I personally prefer Gaulois blondes (the first cigarettes I ever smoked). I never called the french "pussies"- that was you assuming you know what I believe and what I think simply because I enjoy a few jokes- I guess your openmindedness only goes so far.

You can still respect a culture and have a sense of humor. I've even laughed at German and Irish jokes, which puts me in a rough spot for two reasons; first, I'm both, and second some of the German jokes were in French. I've laughed at American jokes too. I'm in big trouble for that one.

I'm sure you would prefer that I go burn a flag- that way I would fit into your nice little stereotypical American category, but it doesn't work like that. Just because I laugh at jokes doesn't make me "hate the French pussies", I'm sorry, it just doesn't work that way. At least I admit that I can jump to conclusions- most humans do. And I take back what I said about wanting anyone to go into a french American Jokes forum...I wouldn't want you to ruin their jokes, too. But seriously, ask yourself...if you were in a French forum, would you be standing up as much for Americans?

What???!!!??? French jokes have been around for years...and I've never heard the prez tell a french joke, or bash them...it was France and Germany who wouldn't support us...so we did something without their blessing. That's it. A few Americans got carried away (Yes, Freedom fries are stupid, and all of that perfectly good wine...makes me sick to think about it). Countries piss each other off all the time...

I'm wondering though...you don't see the similarities in "french bashing" and calling the President of the United States "the cowboy in DC"? I wouldn't call Chirac the "frog in Paris". I love double standards- and don't even try to tell me you don't have one...it is sooooo clear in that message. J'accuse!!!! (see...a french joke that doesn't make fun of the french!) Can't we all just lighten up? If you don't like it, then don't read it. Go to a different forum and join the thread there...just please stop derailing this one...

For a humorous analogy, you don't see me going into a homosexual room and trying to turn them straight, do you? Do you know why? Because I love lesbians (that was the humorous part, but you get the point). I respect them for who they are and I *try* to tolerate differences among people but I'm human, and will come up short sometimes. However, will I stand up for something I believe in? Absolutely... Will I go looking for a fight? Absolutely not...

awww, poor guy... I'm glad I don't have the same problem

wow baby! (aimed at biznatch) check you out being all intelectual and chic :)...and ahem..i'm all for french bashing (just ask biznatch) but you guys are kinda giving americans a bad name..whats that old joke...you know freedom fries and idiot cheese...why exactly are we supposed to hate the french? i think i may have lost that train of thought while i was busy hating canada and the irish ;)

OK, shoot me for being serious in the humor section.

France is a Great County. This is a fact.

HOWEVER

If France were half as great a country as the French believe it is, it would rule the world. This is not a joke. This is the basis of French Diplomacy. France has never gotten over losing its Empire to the British and it's primacy in Europe to the Germans, and it deals with it in the same way that America does its military and political blunders - it ignores them.

</serious>

The French economy is so screwed up they don't even have a word for entrepreneur. Tourism was off so much last year that Parisians had to be rude to each other. Q: Why are the streets of Paris lined with trees? A: So the german Army can march in the shade.

Some of you guys need to relax.

And the last time I checked, the French weren't a race apart, so charges of "racism" are rediculous.

Now that joke was funny as hell. :lol:
anyway I decided not to post here anymore. I guess I'm tired; yes I still think the thread started as kind of wrong. But you know...no beef. whatever.
So yeah, I decided to post some jokes on my own people....
I'm translating them, so bear with me:
-How does french man commit suicide?
He shoots a bullet 8 inches over his head because of his superiority complex.
-When God created France, he made it the most beautiful country of the world. So to avoid jealousy amongst other people, he reestablished balance by populating it with the french.
-Why do french people drown more often than other people? Because they can't shut their big mouth up for more than 5 seconds
-What's the difference between Nelson Mandela and most french govt members? Nelson Mandela went to jail before he worked in the govt.

After all, it's the humor section. Everyone had a good laugh and I say goodbye to that post. Unless someone moves it...

Humor section, i was under the impression all jokes were to be taken as jokes?

I originally posted it as a joke. I still meant it to be a joke. I am absolutely astounded that this is still kicking.

guess i'll have to find more like this :D

Relations between the US and the French have been strained since the start of the Iraq invasion (and were always a bit awkward at the best of times)...

Is it any surprise that you would get this sort of reaction?

The funnyest thing is the notion that the US has a better millitary history than the French.

They've lost battles to Mexicans, Canadians, Indians, The Japanese, The British, The Vietnamese and even themselves in their rich and glorious military history.

In the opening stages of the Gulf Wars I and II, more allied casualties were caused by 'friendly fire' from the 'expertly' trained US forces, than were inflicted by the entire Iraqi army - talk about not wanting the French Army behind you, I'd much prefer the French to the Americans.

If the US wasn't bankrupting itself by funding their huge military budget, they might realise that behind all the shiny guns and designer uniforms, their troops are regarded as the least disciplined, worst trained, slapdash outfit in the world.

If the American people's anscestry wasn't largely British, they'd be in real trouble!

Now that IS funny.

Do you have any proof to back up that statement? Generally, the US is counted in the top 5 in the world for being one of the best trained military outfits.

How am I supposed to proove what the world thinks about the US army? Ask them yourself. (But I suppose a good place to start would be the friends and family of the allied soldiers killed by US 'friendly fire' Ho ho.) Perception is not necessaraly the same as reality. Who else are in the top 5?

I thought this thread was dead. But I have said I wouldn't talk in here. So I take no part in this. But I have tried to cool people off with the French bashing, and it ended in a long discussion. The topic of war these days is extremely polemic...
I don't think I wanna go through a whole new thread war.
So yeah. zen_tom I'm not telling you that what to do, just warning you that as you can see in the previous posts here, people get quite worked up over these things... If there's something americans don't like, its someone downtalking their military. We frenchmen don't care that much(about all those white flag jokes n all), but straight up calling them "pussies" and stuff isn't pleasant to hear.. And I guess nobody would like to hear those kind of things. Anyway I'll give anti french people that we don't have the best military history, and I won't bother discussing that. I know what I know, and I have learned our history; I won't discuss American history here because its not the topic of the thread.
Anyway, cheers to all. I'm out.

Hey biz, you're right, but if people are happy bashing other people's countries, they ought to realise what the jokes are about their own right? Personally, I think it's all in poor taste, but hate seeing double standards going on. But hey, it's just jokes, right?

Somehow I doubt this.

These jokes aren't new, and they're gonna be around for a while. Get used to it. It is a joke. Jokes are not for everyone. If you don't find it funny, instead of lingering on it, go find a joke you think is funny, and have a laugh.

I'm french, it's funny. The title was really fitting.

Not every joke is funny to everyone. There are alot of people who really don't like my dead baby jokes.

These are jokes that target a specific group of people. There are alot of them. Alot of them are on this board. If you've ever laughed at a joke that targeted a specific group of people, you really can't talk.

Honestly, this thread should just get closed. The bickering will never stop. We've gone beyond the point of Tilted Humor.

*Agrees with T3m3st*

Et c'est fini... j'espere.

And this thread was resurrected...why?

Hi Lebell,
I take responsibility for starting up the whole French thing again (I was going to PM you directly but your inbox must be full, rather than bump it anymore than I have already done) I think I saw it referenced by someone else and had a look, didn't see how old it was and steamed in with my own slant (which wasn't helpfull or necessary in hindsight)

Anyway, apologies for not holding back till I'd cooled off a bit. Yes this is in the jokes section (rather than politics etc), and yes I should have thought twice before stirring it up again.

and t3m3st i choose to deliberately try and ignore your comment about me not having better things to do than "fl4m3" USA in another forum. You don't know me, you don't know how I spend my life...so don't make assumptions about my activities. If you're gonna argue against me on a personal level, do it as a PM. But in a board i don't think you should base your arguments on a quote that was from so long ago and quoted way out of context. If you wanna do that..fine. Just don't expect replies to your "doubts".

haha thanks for proving my point.

I was trying to make a statement to everyone on this thread. Leave it be. Plenty of other jokes to check out on this board.

Also, I enjoyed how you assumed my name was l33t speak. I haven't seen anyone use that in a while. What does my name translate to? Weird...

I didn't expect a reply, I was hoping the thread would get closed... hint hint :D

Flame the USA all you like, I sure as hell do!

Peace out, I'm done here. Gonna get myself a life too, if Tekken 5 counts as such.

I am still of the opinion that people need to lighten up and that every country (France and the US for example) are going to get their share of jokes, but this thread has already had its run, so I'm closing it.