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09-17-2004, 08:28 PM
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#1 (permalink) |
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Upright
Location: communist valley
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Drunk driver
A Highway Patrolman waited outside a popular bar, hoping for a bust. At closing time everyone come out and he spotted his potential quarry. The man was so obviously inebriated that he could barely walk. He stumbled around the parking lot for a few minutes, looking for his car. After trying his keys on five other cars, he finally found his own vehicle. He sat in the car a good ten minutes, as the other patrons left. He turned his lights on, then off, wipers on, then off. He started to pull forward into the grass, then stopped. Finally, when he was the last car, he pulled out onto the road and started to drive away. The patrolman, waiting for this, turned on his lights and pulled the man over. He administered the breathalyzer test, and to his great surprise, the man blew a 0.00. The patrolman was dumbfounded. "This equipment must be broken!" he exclaimed. "I doubt it," said the man, "Tonight I am the designated decoy!"
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09-19-2004, 08:17 AM
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#7 (permalink) |
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Free Mars!
Location: I dunno, there's white people around me saying "eh" all the time
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That's hilarious! We gotta get one of those
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Looking out the window, that's an act of war. Staring at my shoes, that's an act of war. Committing an act of war? Oh you better believe that's an act of war |
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09-22-2004, 03:10 PM
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#17 (permalink) | |
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Junkie
Location: Florida
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Quote:
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09-23-2004, 07:46 AM
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#18 (permalink) |
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pinche vato
Location: backwater, Third World, land of cotton
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A drunk Cajun left the bar one night and lost control of his car on the way home. He finally came to a rest after flipping his car through seven or eight rolls, and calmly waited for the highway patrol to arrive.
When the patrolman arrived, he took one look at the accident scene, shook his head, and approached the Cajun. He asked, "Sir, are you drunk?" The Cajun pulled himself up straight and tall and retorted, "Hell, yeah. You don't think I'm one of those damn reckless drivers, do you?" (a classic from Justin Wilson)
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Living is easy with eyes closed. Last edited by warrrreagl; 09-23-2004 at 07:49 AM.. |
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| driver, drunk |
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