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Old 05-07-2003, 12:45 PM   #1 (permalink)
Heathen
 
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Location: California
The Wife

A woman came home just in time to find her husband in bed with
another woman. With superhuman strength borne of fury, she
dragged her husband down the stairs to the garage and put his
penis in a vise. She then secured it tightly and removed the
handle.

Next she picked up a hacksaw.

The husband terrified, screamed, "Stop! Stop! You're not going to
cut it off are you?"

The wife, with a gleam of revenge in her eye, handed him the saw and said, "Nope" I'm going to set the garage on fire."

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Old 05-07-2003, 12:50 PM   #2 (permalink)
Tilted
 
ohhhh that hurts!!!!!!!!!!
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Old 05-07-2003, 12:59 PM   #3 (permalink)
Insane
 
oh man, wouldn't you rather die?
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Old 05-07-2003, 02:15 PM   #4 (permalink)
Crazy
 
i think i would have to allow myself to be burned
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Old 05-07-2003, 02:23 PM   #5 (permalink)
Crazy
 
Location: Fresno, CA
that was pretty funny ... thanks for sharing!
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Old 05-07-2003, 02:30 PM   #6 (permalink)
Junkie
 
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Location: Up yonder
Ohhhhh hell hath no fury like a woman scorned!
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Old 05-07-2003, 04:34 PM   #7 (permalink)
Insane
 
Location: Tucson, AZ
OMG Ouch! nooooo!!

Id slowly cook while i tried to saw through the vice..
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Old 05-07-2003, 05:19 PM   #8 (permalink)
Metal and Rock 4 Life
 
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Location: Phoenix
i'd cut the wooden table that the vice is most likely hooked up to

or

manipulate the saw in some manor to be able to turn the vice to open

but dammmn that bitch had it in for him
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Old 05-07-2003, 06:42 PM   #9 (permalink)
We're having potato pancakes!
 
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Location: stalag 13
I think the husband is doing pornos now.
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Old 05-07-2003, 07:35 PM   #10 (permalink)
Junkie
 
Location: Montreal
Some McGyver-type thinking here, funny!
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Old 05-07-2003, 07:58 PM   #11 (permalink)
Upright
 
I'm pretty sure that in some culture, that was punishment for rape... they would nail your balls to the floor of a hut, hand your a knife, and set it on fire.
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Old 05-08-2003, 08:30 AM   #12 (permalink)
Upright
 
Location: In Front of My PC
CUT IT OFF, PLEASE CUT IT OFF!!!! haha
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Old 05-08-2003, 08:52 AM   #13 (permalink)
I change
 
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Location: USA
I guess this guy didn't expect The Spanish Inquisition.

Sometimes it pays to expect The Spanish Inquisition.
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Old 05-08-2003, 09:58 AM   #14 (permalink)
Addict
 
Location: around the corner
I would only hope that guy worked well under pressure
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Old 05-08-2003, 10:13 AM   #15 (permalink)
Psycho
 
zaiaz's Avatar
 
Location: State of confusion...wait that's medication.
Hey quick tell her to give you the pvc cutters they are quicker.
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Old 05-08-2003, 10:23 AM   #16 (permalink)
Poo-tee-weet?
 
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Location: The Woodlands, TX
yowsa thats terrible!!!
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Old 05-08-2003, 12:28 PM   #17 (permalink)
Crazy
 
Good one, tough decision.
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Old 05-08-2003, 12:30 PM   #18 (permalink)
Crazy
 
hahaha love the fiendishness
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Old 05-09-2003, 02:25 AM   #19 (permalink)
Psycho
 
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Yeah! Mad Max style revenge!!!
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Old 05-10-2003, 01:49 AM   #20 (permalink)
Banned
 
Location: York
It would have to be a small saw to cut my pecker off
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Old 05-10-2003, 03:37 AM   #21 (permalink)
Sky Piercer
 
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Location: Ireland
Good Lord! That doesn't bear thinking about! Excellent Joke!
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Old 05-10-2003, 08:17 AM   #22 (permalink)
Pro Libertate
 
Location: City Gecko
Moral of the Story:
Always have a detached garage.

Made me
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Old 05-10-2003, 10:32 AM   #23 (permalink)
Psycho
 
Location: Where hockey pucks run rampant
LMAO!

Reminds me of Mad Max, only MUCH more painful.
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Old 05-10-2003, 11:40 AM   #24 (permalink)
Crazy
 
ROFL i'd get a super human act of strength and pull the table with me out the garage.
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Old 05-10-2003, 12:00 PM   #25 (permalink)
Hiding Out
 
Ahhhh!!!! Nooo!!!!!!! It's the ultimate in cruel ultimatums! Don't get any ideas girls...
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