A couple of my favorites
 

I'm new to the board, so I don't know if this has been posted before, and I'm not sure how I'd search for it, so I'll just post :)

A lawyer is sitting next to a blonde on an airplane. Being the immoral man that he is, he decides to capitalize on the stupidity of all blondes and proposes a game to her. The game goes like this: he will ask her a question. Using any and all tools availible, if she can't find the answer, then she pays him $5. Then she gets to ask him a question, and he does the same. She politely declines the game, because she really didn't want anything to do with this guy.

About 30 minutes later, the lawyer decides he really wants to get some of this blonde's money, so he asks her to play the game again, except this time, if the lawyer cannot answer her question, he will pay her $100, but if she cannot answer his question, she only pays him $5. The blonde, not wanting to pass up such an opportunity, decides it can't hurt and accepts the challenge.

The lawyer goes first and asks the following: "Why is the sky blue?" The blonde thinks a little bit, and after a few minutes hands the lawyer $5. She follows up with a question: "What walks on 4 legs, runs uphill on two legs and runs downhill on 3 legs?" The lawyer, not knowing the answer, starts to panic. He takes out his laptop, connects to the internet, and looks around online to try to find the answer. He also calls all of his friends. After about 2 hours, he finally decides to give up. He hands her $100, she takes it, and decides to go back to sleep. The lawyer, a bit stunned, finally asks, "Well, what was the answer?" The blonde hands him $5.

I'll post a second joke when I get back from class, btw :)

Ok, time for the second joke.

A man is in a hot air balloon by himself and gets horribly lost. Just when he's about to lose hope, he sees another man walking in the field below him. He lowers the balloon and asks the man, "Where am I?"

The man responds, "you are in a hot air balloon, about 10 feet above this field."

"You must be an engineer," replies the man in the balloon.

"Yes, I am... how did you know?" Asks the other man.

"Well, you see, you answered my question truthfully, but I am still no better off than I was before."

"You must be a manager," replies the engineer.

"Yes I am! How did you know?"

"Well, you have no idea where you are or where you're going, but now suddenly it's my fault."

the second joke is priceless. thanks

I have the second joke posted in my cubicle wall. My boss does not think it's funny, which is why I keep it there.

LOL God of Thunder :)

Yeah, it's an oldie but goodie.

Both got a chuckle out of me...

good ones.

I'm a manager, it's so true

both jokes were great!

oldies but goodies

and welcome to the TFP

2nd joke is too true...

good stuff

good jokes, thanks

gotta love that 2nd joke :D

lol its funny because is true...

That second one was told and re-told at my old work, excellent telling!

Great jokes.....I'm printing it as we speak(@work lol)

Love the second one.

good stuff!