IT Personnel - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

Janie · 05-21-2003, 03:30 PM

Comprehending IT Personnel

Take One
Two IT students were walking across the park when one said, "Where did you get such a great bike?"
The second IT guy replied, "Well, I was walking along yesterday minding my own business when a beautiful woman rode up on this bike. She threw the bike to the ground, took off all her clothes and said, "Take what you want."
The second IT guy nodded approvingly, "Good choice; the clothes probably wouldn't have fit."

Take Two
An architect, an artist and an IT guy were discussing whether it was better to spend time with the wife or a mistress.

The architect said he enjoyed time with his wife, building a solid foundation for an enduring relationship.

The artist said he enjoyed time with his mistress, because of the passion and mystery he found there.

The IT guy said, "I like both. If you have a wife and a mistress, they will each assume you are spending time with the other woman, and you can go to the office and get some work done."

Take Three
To the optimist, the glass is half full.

To the pessimist, the glass is half empty.

To the IT guy, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be.

Take Four
An IT guy was crossing a road one day when a frog called out to him and said, "If you kiss me, I'll turn into a beautiful princess".

He bent over, picked up the frog and put it in his pocket. The frog spoke up again and said, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a beautiful princess, I will stay with you for one week."

The IT guy took the frog out of his pocket, smiled at it and returned it to the pocket. The frog then cried out, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a princess, I'll stay with you for a week and do ANYTHING you want."

Again the IT guy took the frog out, smiled at it and put it back into his pocket. Finally, the frog asked, "What is the matter? I've told you I'm a beautiful princess, that I'll stay with you for a week and do anything you want. Why won't you kiss me?".

The IT guy said, "Look I work in IT. I don't have time for a girlfriend, but a talking frog-now that's cool."

GoldenOuroboros · 05-21-2003, 05:31 PM

lol..
good ones.. but old.. but still good..

TwoToTango · 05-22-2003, 06:47 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Janie

To the optimist, the glass is half full.

To the pessimist, the glass is half empty.

To the IT guy, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be.

I seem to recall an old Dilbert strip that
ended with him saying "Good thing I
keep the other half of my water in this
redundant glass."

Hmm... maybe you had to see it...

CSflim · 05-22-2003, 01:34 PM

IT guy huh? These are really engineer jokes, but the translation works quite well, except for the glass half full/ half empty...makes more sense with an engineer!

strange · 05-22-2003, 02:52 PM

Funny stuff!

DEI37 · 05-22-2003, 02:57 PM

Those are funny.

Brewmaniac · 05-22-2003, 03:09 PM

Funny shit! Thanks

05-21-2003, 03:30 PM	#1 (permalink)
Janie Insane Location: Greater Vancouver	IT Personnel Comprehending IT Personnel Take One Two IT students were walking across the park when one said, "Where did you get such a great bike?" The second IT guy replied, "Well, I was walking along yesterday minding my own business when a beautiful woman rode up on this bike. She threw the bike to the ground, took off all her clothes and said, "Take what you want." The second IT guy nodded approvingly, "Good choice; the clothes probably wouldn't have fit." Take Two An architect, an artist and an IT guy were discussing whether it was better to spend time with the wife or a mistress. The architect said he enjoyed time with his wife, building a solid foundation for an enduring relationship. The artist said he enjoyed time with his mistress, because of the passion and mystery he found there. The IT guy said, "I like both. If you have a wife and a mistress, they will each assume you are spending time with the other woman, and you can go to the office and get some work done." Take Three To the optimist, the glass is half full. To the pessimist, the glass is half empty. To the IT guy, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be. Take Four An IT guy was crossing a road one day when a frog called out to him and said, "If you kiss me, I'll turn into a beautiful princess". He bent over, picked up the frog and put it in his pocket. The frog spoke up again and said, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a beautiful princess, I will stay with you for one week." The IT guy took the frog out of his pocket, smiled at it and returned it to the pocket. The frog then cried out, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a princess, I'll stay with you for a week and do ANYTHING you want." Again the IT guy took the frog out, smiled at it and put it back into his pocket. Finally, the frog asked, "What is the matter? I've told you I'm a beautiful princess, that I'll stay with you for a week and do anything you want. Why won't you kiss me?". The IT guy said, "Look I work in IT. I don't have time for a girlfriend, but a talking frog-now that's cool." __________________ cheers to the motherland

05-21-2003, 05:31 PM	#2 (permalink)
GoldenOuroboros The Cheshire Grin... Location: An Aussie Outback	lol.. good ones.. but old.. but still good.. __________________ Can you see me grin grin grrriiiiinnnning?!

05-22-2003, 01:34 PM	#4 (permalink)
CSflim Sky Piercer Location: Ireland	IT guy huh? These are really engineer jokes, but the translation works quite well, except for the glass half full/ half empty...makes more sense with an engineer! __________________

05-22-2003, 02:57 PM	#6 (permalink)
DEI37 Go faster! Location: Wisconsin	Those are funny. __________________ Generally speaking, if you were to get what you really deserve, you might be unpleasantly surprised.

05-22-2003, 03:09 PM	#7 (permalink)
Brewmaniac Searching for the perfect brew!	Funny shit! Thanks __________________ "That's a joke... I say, that's a joke, son"

05-22-2003, 02:52 PM	#5 (permalink)
strange Insane Location: So. Cal.	Funny stuff!