How to get ahead at work - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

DEI37 · 12-21-2003, 07:17 AM

Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%? We have all been to those meetings where someone wants over 100%.

How about achieving 103%?

Here's a little math that might prove helpful.

If A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z is represented as:
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26

Then,
H A R D W O R K
8 1 18 4 23 15 18 11 = 98%

K N O W L E D G E
11 14 15 23 12 5 4 7 5 = 96%

But,
A T T I T U D E
1 20 20 9 20 21 4 5 = 100%

And,
B U L L S H I*T
2 21 12 12 19 8 9 20 = 103%

So, it stands to reason that hardwork and knowledge will get you close, attitude will get you there, but bullsh*t will put you over the top.

And look how far
A S S K I S S I N G
1 19 19 11 9 19 19 9 14 7 = 118%
will take you!

sillygirl · 12-21-2003, 12:58 PM

TerresqueÜ · 12-21-2003, 04:02 PM

Clever trick. Thanks

MexicanOnABike · 12-21-2003, 09:19 PM

thats pretty cool...
i wonder if it works for ppls IQ.

Crack · 12-23-2003, 06:42 PM

I just hope the management at work don't get ahold of this, there will be another hour and a half long meeting to attend...
~Crack

floydthebarber · 12-23-2003, 07:26 PM

I'll send that to my boss.

12-24-2003, 03:13 AM

Well, if ass kissing gives 118% it's just another reason why we should have more women in positions of power.

Bodidly · 12-24-2003, 12:22 PM

We all lost something special the day we lost Dale. The lord got a good man that day. Wonder what him , Neil, Davey,Tim, Alan, Fireball and the boys are doing?

SAM821 · 12-25-2003, 05:01 PM

i know some people that this would be relevent for at my job.... very interesting... and very true

herostar · 12-26-2003, 11:34 AM

nice I'm gunna email that to my co-workers

batm4n_23 · 12-26-2003, 09:49 PM

the numbers don't lie

yoda77 · 12-26-2003, 11:07 PM

figures the asskissers always get ahead!

Tiger69z · 12-29-2003, 09:54 PM

Hey...

Look how far sleeping will get you

Z Z Z Z Z Z Z
26 26 26 26 26 26 26 = 182%

AND the longer you sleep, the more productive you are

sky_driver · 01-03-2004, 09:18 PM

Excellent. Thank you.

Arachnid · 01-04-2004, 10:23 PM

LOL.............. i knew it was true....... now i have the proof .... the proof i tells ya

Cheers

Starfish · 01-04-2004, 10:54 PM

awesome!

12-21-2003, 07:17 AM	#1 (permalink)
DEI37 Go faster! Location: Wisconsin	How to get ahead at work Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%? We have all been to those meetings where someone wants over 100%. How about achieving 103%? Here's a little math that might prove helpful. If A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z is represented as: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 Then, H A R D W O R K 8 1 18 4 23 15 18 11 = 98% K N O W L E D G E 11 14 15 23 12 5 4 7 5 = 96% But, A T T I T U D E 1 20 20 9 20 21 4 5 = 100% And, B U L L S H IT 2 21 12 12 19 8 9 20 = 103% So, it stands to reason that hardwork and knowledge will get you close, attitude will get you there, but bullsht will put you over the top. And look how far A S S K I S S I N G 1 19 19 11 9 19 19 9 14 7 = 118% will take you! __________________ Generally speaking, if you were to get what you really deserve, you might be unpleasantly surprised.

12-21-2003, 12:58 PM	#2 (permalink)
sillygirl Newlywed Location: at home	__________________ Anyone can be passionate, but it takes real lovers to be silly-Rose Franken ....absence makes me miss him more...

12-21-2003, 04:02 PM	#3 (permalink)
TerresqueÜ Hiding Out	Clever trick. Thanks __________________ Say yes to the 'Tilted Roleplaying' Forum http://www.tfproject.org/tfp/showthread.php?s=&threadid=1932&highlight=petition

12-21-2003, 09:19 PM	#4 (permalink)
MexicanOnABike Location: up north	thats pretty cool... i wonder if it works for ppls IQ. __________________ - Movie Reviews - Ratings-

12-23-2003, 06:42 PM	#5 (permalink)
Crack Misanthropic Location: Ohio! yay!	I just hope the management at work don't get ahold of this, there will be another hour and a half long meeting to attend... ~Crack __________________ Crack, you and I are long overdue for a vicious bout of mansex. ~Halx

12-23-2003, 07:26 PM	#6 (permalink)
floydthebarber Insane Location: ?	I'll send that to my boss. __________________ wish you were here

12-24-2003, 03:13 AM	#7 (permalink)
Strobs Guest	Well, if ass kissing gives 118% it's just another reason why we should have more women in positions of power.

12-24-2003, 12:22 PM	#8 (permalink)
Bodidly Upright	We all lost something special the day we lost Dale. The lord got a good man that day. Wonder what him , Neil, Davey,Tim, Alan, Fireball and the boys are doing?

12-25-2003, 05:01 PM	#9 (permalink)
SAM821 Surviving Hurricanes Location: Miami, Florida	i know some people that this would be relevent for at my job.... very interesting... and very true

12-26-2003, 11:34 AM	#10 (permalink)
herostar Psycho Location: South Dakota	nice I'm gunna email that to my co-workers __________________ Got time to chill?

12-26-2003, 09:49 PM	#11 (permalink)
batm4n_23 Addict	the numbers don't lie

12-26-2003, 11:07 PM	#12 (permalink)
yoda77 Tilted Location: SF BAY AREA	figures the asskissers always get ahead! __________________ DRINK,SMOKE AND LAUGH

12-29-2003, 09:54 PM	#13 (permalink)
Tiger69z Banned Location: Sunny S.FLA	Hey... Look how far sleeping will get you Z Z Z Z Z Z Z 26 26 26 26 26 26 26 = 182% AND the longer you sleep, the more productive you are

01-03-2004, 09:18 PM	#14 (permalink)
sky_driver Insane	Excellent. Thank you.

01-04-2004, 10:23 PM	#15 (permalink)
Arachnid Crazy Location: Melb - Australia	LOL.............. i knew it was true....... now i have the proof .... the proof i tells ya Cheers __________________ -------------------- Cheers

01-04-2004, 10:54 PM	#16 (permalink)
Starfish Tilted Location: Illnois	awesome! __________________ Evil Milkman: "So I wonder what it would taste like now?" Me: "Like a big floppy penis that hasn't been washed in a couple days."