tekaweni

Just after I got married, I was invited out for a night with the boys." I told my wife that I would be home by midnight... promise!

Well, the hours passed and the beer was going down way too easy. At around 3A.M. drunk as a skunk, I headed for home. Just as I got in the door, the cuckoo clock in the hall started up, and cuckooed 3 times. Quickly I realized she'd probably wake up, so I cuckooed another 9 times. I was really proud of myself, having a quick witty solution, even when smashed, to escape a possible conflict.

Next morning, the wife asked me what time I got in and I told her 12 o'clock. She didn't seem disturbed at all. Whew! Got away with that one!

She then told me that we needed a new cuckoo clock. When I asked her why she said,

"Well, it cuckooed 3 times, said 'oh ****,' cuckooed 4 more times, cleared its throat, cuckooed another 3 times, giggled, cuckooed twice more, and then farted."

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If you always do what you've always done, you'll always get what you've always gotten

Artsemis

LOL

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- Artsemis
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There are two keys to being the best:
1.) Never tell everything you know

clifclav

so I'm not the only one who doesn't remember things when I'm drunk. phew thats a relief

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Neither rain , nor cold, nor dark of night shall.......ahh whatever, just get me a beer!

SofaKing

HAHAHAAH, oh man that is so beautiful.

deportes

good old joke

scrappmittens

haahhaha....Hilarious!!!!!

cchris

An old pearler that still cracks me up.

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There's a fine line between participation and mockery

cyclone

ROFL

Reese

I always love this one.. Funny as hell, Thanks

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“It is better to be rich and healthy than poor and sick” - Dave Barry

macmanmike6100

lol oh god that's great;

fizzledorf

where can i find that cuckoo clock!