Misdirection - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

-|Flake|- · 10-27-2003, 02:53 PM

A woman was shopping at her local supermarket where she selected:
a quart of milk
a carton of eggs
a 1/2 gallon of orange juice
a head of romaine lettuce
a can of coffee
and a package of bacon.

As she was unloading her items on the conveyor belt to check out, a drunk standing behind her watched as she placed the items in front of the cashier.

Drunk: "You must be single."

The woman, a bit startled but intrigued by the derelict's intuition, looked at her six items on the belt but saw nothing particularly unusual about her selections

Woman: "Well, you know what, you're absolutely correct. But how on earth did you know that?"

Drunk: "'cause you're fuckin' ugly."

sipsake · 10-27-2003, 03:02 PM

Oh, man...that's cold! Funny, but cold.

Yeah, I'm e-mailing it to friends.

majik_6 · 10-27-2003, 04:15 PM

That was great!

*puts it in the mental Rolodex for next time I see certain friends*

TerresqueÜ · 10-27-2003, 05:16 PM

I think it's a repost, but it's still good.

Deuce66 · 10-27-2003, 06:45 PM

hahahaha, that was awsome, I'm totally telling that one to a few friendfs of mine =)

MikeyChalupa · 10-27-2003, 07:24 PM

I've heard a similar one, it's a guy shopping, buying a roll of TP, 6-pack of beer, TV guide, and mac&cheese. Hot checkout girl asks if he's single... you know the rest.

-Mikey

WarWagon · 10-28-2003, 01:27 PM

Oh man, that got all 10 of us in the suite laughing.

weasel519 · 10-29-2003, 12:43 PM

Oh man thats funny!

Stare At The Sun · 10-29-2003, 02:04 PM

coooold.

But funny.

Bowlcut · 10-29-2003, 07:15 PM

ouch.....

love it

Aesik · 10-29-2003, 08:20 PM

Bahahaha! Had my gears turning the whole time trying to anticipate the ending!

Gortexfogg · 10-29-2003, 09:52 PM

Hilarious!

HunterDevourer · 10-29-2003, 10:22 PM

That is fantastic.

Keg-o-Grog · 10-30-2003, 03:29 AM

hahaw :P neatness

tontoom · 10-30-2003, 03:38 AM

hehe

Funny one

bravo49 · 11-03-2003, 03:35 AM

I thought that was great, but my wife didn't

jimwah · 11-03-2003, 05:44 AM

lol, thats the funniest thing i've heard... or read.... or whatver

Smoey · 11-03-2003, 06:13 AM

good joke

10-27-2003, 02:53 PM	#1 (permalink)
-\|Flake\|- Upright	Misdirection A woman was shopping at her local supermarket where she selected: a quart of milk a carton of eggs a 1/2 gallon of orange juice a head of romaine lettuce a can of coffee and a package of bacon. As she was unloading her items on the conveyor belt to check out, a drunk standing behind her watched as she placed the items in front of the cashier. Drunk: "You must be single." The woman, a bit startled but intrigued by the derelict's intuition, looked at her six items on the belt but saw nothing particularly unusual about her selections Woman: "Well, you know what, you're absolutely correct. But how on earth did you know that?" Drunk: "'cause you're fuckin' ugly."

10-27-2003, 03:02 PM	#2 (permalink)
sipsake Psycho Location: Memphis	Oh, man...that's cold! Funny, but cold. Yeah, I'm e-mailing it to friends. __________________ When life hands you a lemon, say "Oh yeah, I like lemons. What else you got?" Henry Rollins

10-27-2003, 04:15 PM	#3 (permalink)
majik_6 narcissist Location: looking in a mirror	That was great! puts it in the mental Rolodex for next time I see certain friends __________________ it's all about self-indulgence

10-27-2003, 05:16 PM	#4 (permalink)
TerresqueÜ Hiding Out	I think it's a repost, but it's still good. __________________ Say yes to the 'Tilted Roleplaying' Forum http://www.tfproject.org/tfp/showthread.php?s=&threadid=1932&highlight=petition

10-29-2003, 07:15 PM	#10 (permalink)
Bowlcut Tilted Location: Nashville, TN USA	ouch..... love it __________________ Remember, my opinion is as irrelevant as yours.....

10-27-2003, 06:45 PM	#5 (permalink)
Deuce66 Tilted	hahahaha, that was awsome, I'm totally telling that one to a few friendfs of mine =)

10-27-2003, 07:24 PM	#6 (permalink)
MikeyChalupa Squid Location: USS George Washington	I've heard a similar one, it's a guy shopping, buying a roll of TP, 6-pack of beer, TV guide, and mac&cheese. Hot checkout girl asks if he's single... you know the rest. -Mikey

10-28-2003, 01:27 PM	#7 (permalink)
WarWagon Loser	Oh man, that got all 10 of us in the suite laughing.

10-29-2003, 12:43 PM	#8 (permalink)
weasel519 Upright	Oh man thats funny!

10-29-2003, 02:04 PM	#9 (permalink)
Stare At The Sun Eh? Location: Somewhere over the rainbow	coooold. But funny.

10-29-2003, 08:20 PM	#11 (permalink)
Aesik Tilted	Bahahaha! Had my gears turning the whole time trying to anticipate the ending!

10-29-2003, 09:52 PM	#12 (permalink)
Gortexfogg I and I Location: Stillwater, OK	Hilarious!

10-29-2003, 10:22 PM	#13 (permalink)
HunterDevourer Insane Location: Sydney - Australia	That is fantastic. __________________ Viva La Muerte

10-30-2003, 03:29 AM	#14 (permalink)
Keg-o-Grog Insane Location: Foregin student in Texas atm.	hahaw :P neatness __________________ I stand alone without beliefs, the only truth i know is you.

10-30-2003, 03:38 AM	#15 (permalink)
tontoom Upright	hehe Funny one __________________ Viking come with peas

11-03-2003, 06:13 AM	#18 (permalink)
Smoey Upright	good joke

11-03-2003, 03:35 AM	#16 (permalink)
bravo49 Junkie Location: chocolate city	I thought that was great, but my wife didn't

11-03-2003, 05:44 AM	#17 (permalink)
jimwah Upright	lol, thats the funniest thing i've heard... or read.... or whatver