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Old 04-28-2003, 02:20 AM   #1 (permalink)
Psycho
 
forgotten_dream's Avatar
 
Jedi Redneck

You Might Be A Redneck Jedi Warrior If:

You ever heard the phrase, "May the force be with y'all."
Your Jedi robe is a camouflage color.
You have ever used your light saber to open a bottle of Boone's Farm Strawberry Hill.
At least one wing of your X-Wing is primer colored.
You have bantha horns on the front of your land speeder.
You can easily describe the taste of an Ewok.
You have ever had an X-wing up on blocks in your yard.
You ever lost a hand during a light saber fight because you had to spit.
The worst part of spending time on Dagobah is the dadgum skeeters.
Wookies are offended by your B.O.
You have ever used the force to get yourself another beer so you didn't have to wait for a commercial.
You have ever used the force in conjunction with fishing/bowling.
Your father has ever said to you, "Shoot, son come on over to the dark side...it'll be a hoot."
You have ever had your R-2 unit use its self-defense electro-shock-thingy to get the barbecue grill to light.
You have a confederate flag painted on the hood of your land speeder.
You think Han Solo would look better in a flannel cause he looks like a little sissy in that vest.
You have the doors of your X-wing welded shut and you have to get in through the window.
You have ever accidentally referred to Darth Vader's evil empire as "them Yankees."
You have a cousin who bears a strong resemblance to Chewbacca.
You suggested that they outfit the Millennium Falcon with a redwood deck.
In your opinion, that Darth Vader fellow just "ain't right."
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Old 04-28-2003, 04:27 AM   #2 (permalink)
Upright
 
Sounds like you know the Jedi warriors around here very well. Thanks for the laugh!
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Old 04-28-2003, 08:36 AM   #3 (permalink)
pinche vato
 
warrrreagl's Avatar
 
Location: backwater, Third World, land of cotton
Dang, bubba. How'd they know?
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Old 04-28-2003, 10:51 AM   #4 (permalink)
Psycho
 
Location: Sweden
4/5
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Old 04-28-2003, 09:57 PM   #5 (permalink)
Junkie
 
Location: Louisiana
You put an add on the holo net

"Looking for a cute biped female.. with speeder.. send pic of speeder"

You think jabba hutt is a new pizza joint

You use jedi powers to lift all the broken down speeder bikes and speeders so you can finally mow your yard

You have one wall for your den made up of storm trooper helms

Boba Fett is known by his less name of Bubba Jet

You put a spoiler on your TIE fighter... it servers no purpose but to look great through space.

Even wookies look down on your table manners

you use the jedi training orbs to zap bugs on your front porch

You use thermal detonators fishing
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Old 04-28-2003, 10:56 PM   #6 (permalink)
Crazy
 
Location: Houston, Tx
lol, I know star wars geeks that are rednecks, I can see this as the way they envision the series,heh
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Old 04-29-2003, 04:30 AM   #7 (permalink)
RaZ
Crazy
 
Seen it before, good stuff.
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Old 04-29-2003, 06:57 AM   #8 (permalink)
Insane
 
Location: Up my ass
As if the Grand Imperial Jedi Council would allow such people into their ranks.





I'm kidding. Good post.
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