Letter from a Marine
 

Dear Ma and Pa,

I am well. Hope you are. Tell Brother Walt and Brother Elmer the
Marine Corps beats working for old man Minch by a mile. Tell them to
join up quick before maybe all of the places are filled. I was
restless at first because you got to stay in bed till nearly 6 a.m.,
but am getting so I like to sleep late.
Tell Walt and Elmer all you do before breakfast is smooth your cot
and shine some things. No hogs to slop, feed to pitch, mash to mix,
wood to split, fire to lay. Practically nothing. Men got to shave
but it is not so bad, there's warm water.

Breakfast is strong on trimmings like fruit juice, cereal, eggs,
bacon, etc; but kind of weak on chops, potatoes, ham, steak, fried
eggplant, pie and other regular food. But tell Walt and Elmer you
can always sit between two city boys that live on coffee. Their food
plus yours holds you till noon, when you get fed again. It's no
wonder these city boys can't walk much.

We go on "route" marches, which the Platoon Sergeant says are long
walks to harden us. If he thinks so, it is not my place to tell him
different. A "route march" is about as far as to our mailbox at
home. Then the city guys get sore feet and we all ride back in
trucks.

The country is nice, but awful flat. The Sergeant is like a
schoolteacher. He nags some. The Capt. is like the school board.
Majors and Colonels just ride around and frown. They don't bother
you none. This next will kill Walt and Elmer with laughing. I keep
getting medals for shooting. I don't know why. The bulls-eye is near
as big as a chipmunk head and don't move. And it ain't shooting at
you, like the Higgett boys at home. All you got to do is lie there
all comfortable and hit it. You don't even load your own cartridges.
They come in boxes.

Then we have what they call hand-to-hand combat training. You get to
wrestle with them city boys. I have to be real careful though, they
break real easy. It ain't like fighting with that ole bull at home.
I'm about the best they got in this -- except for that Tug Jordan
from over in Silver Lake. He joined up the same time as
me. But I'm only 5'6" and 130 pounds and he's 6'8" and weighs near
300 pounds dry.
Be sure to tell Walt and Elmer to hurry and join before other
fellers get onto this setup and come stampeding in.

Your loving daughter,
Gail

haha... the whole thing is all too true... and the end is a great catch...

Holy.... Man that was the funniest joke I've heard in a long time... Great post!

It's hilarious all the way through, especially at the end!

Heh heh, nice twist at the end

hehe great punch line :D

lol Gail that was a good one

good joke, great ending!

Funny! Should have seen it coming!

Oh man thats funny!

Yeah, great twist there at the end.
Thanks for posting
:)

hahah, very goood. ending definitely makes the joke. nice!

Ending is Great....

I love it.

Now that's humor.

i dont want to date Gail