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Old 10-06-2003, 03:15 AM   #1 (permalink)
It wasnt me
 
tekaweni's Avatar
 
Location: Scotland
The general is in the hospital

The general was confined to the military hospital for treatment of a minor malady.

For almost a week he made a complete nuisance of himself, irritating both staff and the other patients, demanding attention and expecting his every order to be followed immediately. He was in a six-man ward rather than a private room, his meals were too cold or not served to suit his taste, the light needed to be adjusted to his demands, the nighttime activities interfered with his rest... and on, and on.

One afternoon an orderly entered the room. "Time to take your temperature, General."
After growling at the orderly, the general opened his mouth to accept the thermometer.
"Sorry, General, but for this test we need your temperature from the other end."

A whole new barrage of verbal abuse followed, but the orderly was insistent that a rectal temperature was what the test called for. The general at last rolled over, bared his rear, and allowed the orderly to proceed. The orderly then told the general, "Stay exactly like that and don't move. I'll be back in five minutes to check up on you." and withdrew.

An hour later, the head nurse entered the room, saw the general with his bare rear in the air and gasped, "What's going on here?"
"Haven't you ever seen someone having their temperature taken?" the general barked.

"Yes I have, General, but with a daffodil?"
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Old 10-06-2003, 09:43 AM   #2 (permalink)
Addict
 
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Location: Nor Cal
lol, funny.
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Old 10-06-2003, 04:56 PM   #3 (permalink)
Insane
 
Location: Boone,NC
i know some people like that
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Old 11-06-2003, 03:47 PM   #4 (permalink)
Banned
 
Location: Davidson, NC/ Manassas, VA
i dont think that flower grew to well...
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Old 11-06-2003, 06:42 PM   #5 (permalink)
Loser
 
Location: Davidson College, NC
Nice joke!
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Old 11-06-2003, 09:03 PM   #6 (permalink)
Upright
 
funny!
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Old 11-06-2003, 11:41 PM   #7 (permalink)
Devils Cabana Boy
 
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Location: Central Coast CA
with fertilizer
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Old 11-07-2003, 08:46 AM   #8 (permalink)
Banned
 
Location: Davidson, NC/ Manassas, VA
true, there would be some of that
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Old 11-07-2003, 04:15 PM   #9 (permalink)
DILLIGAF
 
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Location: AZ
thtas great!
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Old 11-07-2003, 11:57 PM   #10 (permalink)
I and I
 
Location: Stillwater, OK
I'd hate to be the orderly...
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Old 11-14-2003, 06:18 PM   #11 (permalink)
Misanthropic
 
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Location: Ohio! yay!
I have known some people that I would like to shove a daffodil up thier ass... don't know if that's a good thing or a bad thing...
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Old 11-18-2003, 06:42 AM   #12 (permalink)
Psycho
 
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Location: State of confusion...wait that's medication.
WOW .... times are tough
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Old 11-19-2003, 02:29 AM   #13 (permalink)
Upright
 
Location: Calgary
As an old timer, I remember that event in a Carry On... movie about 40 years ago!
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Old 11-21-2003, 03:37 PM   #14 (permalink)
Addict
 
funny
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Old 11-25-2003, 02:21 PM   #15 (permalink)
Psycho
 
Location: upstate
ROTFLMAO
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Old 02-08-2004, 07:08 PM   #16 (permalink)
Crazy
 
Location: ...the space between what's wrong and right...
That is cute. That happened on an episode of ER.
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Old 02-09-2004, 08:13 PM   #17 (permalink)
Upright
 
lmao...nice one
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