Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community  

Go Back   Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community > Interests > Tilted Humor


 
 
LinkBack Thread Tools
Old 04-25-2003, 09:19 PM   #1 (permalink)
pinche vato
 
warrrreagl's Avatar
 
Location: backwater, Third World, land of cotton
Baghdad Bob quotes (long post)

Mohammed Saeed al-Sahhaf
Insulting Quotes from the Iraqi Information Minister

We're going to drag the drunken, junkie nose of Bush through Iraq's desert; him and his follower dog, Blair.
- Iraqi Information Minister, Mohammed Saeed al-Sahhaf

They are not in control of anything - they don't even control themselves!
- Iraqi Information Minister, Mohammed Saeed al-Sahhaf, on coalition forces

I can say - and I am responsible for what I am saying - that they have started to commit suicide under the walls of Baghdad. We will encourage them to commit more suicides quickly.
- Iraqi Information Minister, Mohammed Saeed al-Sahhaf, on coalition forces

We will slaughter them; Bush Junior, and his international gang of bastards!
- Iraqi Information Minister, Mohammed Saeed al-Sahhaf

There are no American infidels in Baghdad. Never!
- Iraqi Information Minister, Mohammed Saeed al-Sahhaf

God will roast their stomachs in hell at the hands of Iraqis.
- Iraqi Information Minister, Mohammed Saeed al-Sahhaf, on coalition forces

They're coming to surrender, or be burned in their tanks.
- Iraqi Information Minister, Mohammed Saeed al-Sahhaf, on coalition forces

The American press is all about lies! All they tell is lies, lies and more lies!
- Iraqi Information Minister, Mohammed Saeed al-Sahhaf, on the American media

They are most welcome. We will butcher them.
- Iraqi Information Minister, Mohammed Saeed al-Sahhaf, on coalition forces

We will welcome them with bullets and shoes.
- Iraqi Information Minister, Mohammed Saeed al-Sahhaf, on coalition forces (Hitting someone with your shoe is a grave insult in Iraq. It means they are like the dirt on your shoe.)

We are in control. They are in a state of hysteria. Losers! They think that by killing civilians and trying to distort the feelings of the people they will win. I think they will not win. Those bastards!
- Iraqi Information Minister, Mohammed Saeed al-Sahhaf, on coalition forces

We have placed them in a quagmire from which they can never emerge except dead.
- Iraqi Information Minister, Mohammed Saeed al-Sahhaf, on coalition forces

These cowards have no morals. They have no shame about lying.
- Iraqi Information Minister, Mohammed Saeed al-Sahhaf, on coalition forces

They are trapped in Umm Qasr. They are trapped near Basra. They are trapped near Nasiriyah. They are trapped near Najaf. They are trapped everywhere.
- Iraqi Information Minister, Mohammed Saeed al-Sahhaf, on coalition forces

Most of their infidels had their throats cut.
- Iraqi Information Minister, Mohammed Saeed al-Sahhaf, on coalition forces

Our estimates are that none of them will come out alive unless they surrender to us quickly.
- Iraqi Information Minister, Mohammed Saeed al-Sahhaf, on coalition forces

We made them drink poison last night and Saddam Hussein's soldiers and his great forces gave the Americans a lesson which will not be forgotten by history. Truly.
- Iraqi Information Minister, Mohammed Saeed al-Sahhaf

We're giving them a real lesson today. Heavy doesn't accurately describe the level of casualties we have inflicted.
- Iraqi Information Minister, Mohammed Saeed al-Sahhaf, on coalition forces

Their infidels are committing suicide by the hundreds at the gates of Baghdad.
- Iraqi Information Minister, Mohammed Saeed al-Sahhaf, on coalition forces

Today I have visited whole Baghdad city. No invaders found. You go and see how we have ousted them from this city. They are crying outside and waiting to receive bullets. They will be killed shortly.
- Iraqi Information Minister, Mohammed Saeed al-Sahhaf, on coalition forces

The situation is excellent, they are going to try to approach Baghdad, and I believe their grave will be there.
- Iraqi Information Minister, Mohammed Saeed al-Sahhaf, on coalition forces

We defeated them yesterday. God willing, I will provide you with more information. I swear by God, I swear by God, those who are staying in Washington and London have thrown these mercenaries in a crematorium.
- Iraqi Information Minister, Mohammed Saeed al-Sahhaf

Yes, the American troops have advanced further. This will only make it easier for us to defeat them.
- Iraqi Information Minister, Mohammed Saeed al-Sahhaf

By God, I think this is rather very unlikely. This is merely a prattle. The fact is that as soon as they reach Baghdad gates, we will besiege them and slaughter them. Wherever they go they will find themselves encircled.
- Iraqi Information Minister, Mohammed Saeed al-Sahhaf, on coalition forces

The cruise missiles do not frighten anyone. We are catching them like fish in a river. I mean, here that over the past two days we managed to shoot down 196 missiles before they hit their target.
- Iraqi Information Minister, Mohammed Saeed al-Sahhaf

They fled. The American louts fled. Indeed, concerning the fighting waged by the heroes of the Arab Socialist Baath Party yesterday, one amazing thing really is the cowardice of the American soldiers. We had not anticipated this.
- Iraqi Information Minister, Mohammed Saeed al-Sahhaf

The shock has backfired on them. They are shocked because of what they have seen. No one received them with roses. They were received with bombs, shoes and bullets. Now, the game has been exposed. Awe will backfire on them. This is the boa snake. We will extend it further and cut it the appropriate way.
- Iraqi Information Minister, Mohammed Saeed al-Sahhaf, on coalition forces

Their military effort is a subject of laughter throughout the world.
- Iraqi Information Minister, Mohammed Saeed al-Sahhaf, on coalition forces

Their forces committed suicide by the hundreds. The battle is very fierce and God made us victorious.
- Iraqi Information Minister, Mohammed Saeed al-Sahhaf, on coalition forces

We will push those crooks - those mercenaries - back into the swamp.
- Iraqi Information Minister, Mohammed Saeed al-Sahhaf, on coalition forces

Those Iraqi fighters are slapping those gangsters on the face, and then when they flee, they will kick their backsides.
- Iraqi Information Minister, Mohammed Saeed al-Sahhaf, on coalition forces

Don't believe anything! We will chase the rascals back to London!
- Iraqi Information Minister, Mohammed Saeed al-Sahhaf, on British forces

We're now trying to exhaust them, until our leadership decides the time and method to clean our territory of their desecration.
- Iraqi Information Minister, Mohammed Saeed al-Sahhaf, on coalition forces

One hundred infidels committed suicide as they entered the holy city of Baghdad. Their tanks will become their tombs.
- Iraqi Information Minister, Mohammed Saeed al-Sahhaf, on coalition forces

Are these the Americans? People remain silent and placate the Americans. By God, they only deserve scorn. We slaughtered them yesterday and we will continue to slaughter them.
- Iraqi Information Minister, Mohammed Saeed al-Sahhaf

Bush knows that he is standing in quicksand when it comes to his baseless talk on Iraq.
- Iraqi Information Minister, Mohammed Saeed al-Sahhaf

They are not in Najaf. They are nowhere. They are on the moon. They are snakes in the desert.
- Iraqi Information Minister, Mohammed Saeed al-Sahhaf, on coalition forces

We expect the aggressors to use anything, we don't rule-out that in their depression at being vanquished, those losers will become hysterical and commit even more folly.
- Iraqi Information Minister, Mohammed Saeed al-Sahhaf, on coalition forces

God will roast their stomachs in hell at the hands of Iraqis
- Iraqi Information Minister, Mohammed Saeed al-Sahhaf, on coalition forces



And finally, my very favorite:
These cowards have no morals. They have no shame about lying.
- Iraqi Information Minister, Mohammed Saeed al-Sahhaf, on coalition forces
__________________
Living is easy with eyes closed.
warrrreagl is offline  
Old 04-30-2003, 01:04 PM   #2 (permalink)
Hello, good evening, and bollocks.
 
Fearless_Hyena's Avatar
 
Location: near DC
Hilarious post!!!
In the words of President Bush, "He's my man, he's great!" He was a classic.

And it sounds like he's alive! Check out the following link from today's BBC News website:
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/middle_east/2986459.stm

If he really is alive he should move to Hollywood. He'd make a great game show host...
Fearless_Hyena is offline  
Old 04-30-2003, 01:21 PM   #3 (permalink)
Essen meine kurze Hosen
 
Location: NY Burbs
It's a sig smorgasbord.
__________________
Out the 10Base-T, through the router, down the T1, over the leased line, off the bridge, past the firewall...nothing but Net.
platypus is offline  
Old 04-30-2003, 04:05 PM   #4 (permalink)
Squid
 
MikeyChalupa's Avatar
 
Location: USS George Washington
You missed my favorite one!

"This is a complete disgrace. They are a superpower of villains. They are a superpower of Al Capone."
- Iraqi Information Minister, Mohammed Saeed al-Sahhaf

I miss Comical Ali. I hope he is still alive. Poor guy can't even give himself up to the Americans.

-Mikey
MikeyChalupa is offline  
Old 04-30-2003, 04:09 PM   #5 (permalink)
Registered User
 
Location: Earth
That my friend is funny.
Scorpio is offline  
Old 04-30-2003, 09:23 PM   #6 (permalink)
Tilted
 
Location: WI
You know, those will never, ever get old.
Laladien is offline  
Old 05-01-2003, 10:29 AM   #7 (permalink)
 
MexicanOnABike's Avatar
 
Location: up north
ehehe,,, some of these are realy funy!
__________________
MexicanOnABike is offline  
Old 05-01-2003, 02:07 PM   #8 (permalink)
Upright
 
Location: Scotland
Of course no-one'll arrest him. Anyone who imprisons Baghdad Bob risks immediate public hanging by the voting public of the coalition!

I'd go further... I'd bet that if Baghdad Bob ran for US President or UK Prime Minister in a snap election he'd win. Let's face it, a politician who's so obviously honest about his lying is a rare and valuable thing.

So the vote is: Baghdad Bob / Bill Clinton - 2004.
__________________
For sale, 9" Demi-Baguettes... Satisfaction guarenteed!!!
iona is offline  
Old 05-01-2003, 05:02 PM   #9 (permalink)
Psycho
 
I wonder if North Korea has an option on Baghdad Bob's writing team?
wabbit is offline  
Old 05-01-2003, 05:11 PM   #10 (permalink)
Insane
 
Location: Boone, NC
funny - even though he didn't intend it that way
__________________
"Boy, I like that echo... goes right through my head... I had that happen once, but it was chemically induced...." - Steve Earle
GreenCloud is offline  
Old 05-01-2003, 09:35 PM   #11 (permalink)
Insane
 
Location: here
Best Iraqi Information Minister Joke
__________________
What 'chu talkin' 'bout, Willis?
gamer715 is offline  
 

Tags
baghdad, bob, long, post, quotes


Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On



All times are GMT -8. The time now is 03:33 PM.

Tilted Forum Project

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.6.0 PL2
© 2002-2012 Tilted Forum Project

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60 61 62 63 64 65 66 67 68 69 70 71 72 73 74 75 76 77 78 79 80 81 82 83 84 85 86 87 88 89 90 91 92 93 94 95 96 97 98 99 100 101 102 103 104 105 106 107 108 109 110 111 112 113 114 115 116 117 118 119 120 121 122 123 124 125 126 127 128 129 130 131 132 133 134 135 136 137 138 139 140 141 142 143 144 145 146 147 148 149 150 151 152 153 154 155 156 157 158 159 160 161 162 163 164 165 166 167 168 169 170 171 172 173 174 175 176 177 178 179 180 181 182 183 184 185 186 187 188 189 190 191 192 193 194 195 196 197 198 199 200 201 202 203 204 205 206 207 208 209 210 211 212 213 214 215 216 217 218 219 220 221 222 223 224 225 226 227 228 229 230 231 232 233 234 235 236 237 238 239 240 241 242 243 244 245 246 247 248 249 250 251 252 253 254 255 256 257 258 259 260 261 262 263 264 265 266 267 268 269 270 271 272 273 274 275 276 277 278 279 280 281 282 283 284 285 286 287 288 289 290 291 292 293 294 295 296 297 298 299 300 301 302 303 304 305 306 307 308 309 310 311 312 313 314 315 316 317 318 319 320 321 322 323 324 325 326 327 328 329 330 331 332 333 334 335 336 337 338 339 340 341 342 343 344 345 346 347 348 349 350 351 352 353 354 355 356 357 358 359 360