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Old 09-14-2003, 11:21 AM   #1 (permalink)
Insane
 
Location: Milwaukee
Deductive reasoning

A man was out in his yard when he saw that a new neighbor was moving in next door. Wating to be freindly, he went up to strike up a conversation.

"Hi there new neighbor, it sure is a mighty nice day to be moving."
"Yes, it is and people around here seem extremely friendly."
"So what is you do for a living?"
"I am a professor at the University, I teach deductive reasoning."
"Deductive reasoning, what is that?"
"Let me give you an example. I see you have a dog house out back. By that I deduce that you have a dog."
"That is right."
"The fact you have a dog, leads me to deduce that you have a family."
"Right again."
"Since you have a family I deduce that you have a wife."
"Correct."
"And since you have a wife I can deduce that you are heterosexual."
"Yup."
"That is deductive reasoning."
"Cool."

Later that evening, the man is at his local tavern having a few drinks with his buddy.

"So anyway, I met my new neigbor today, just moved in next door to me."
"Is he a nice guy?"
"Yes, and he has an interesting job."
"Oh, yeah what does he do?"
"He is a professor of deductive reasoning at the University."
"Deductive reasoning, what is that?"
"Let me give you an example. Do you have a dog house?"
"No."
"Faggot."
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Old 09-14-2003, 11:38 AM   #2 (permalink)
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chuckle
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Old 09-14-2003, 01:32 PM   #3 (permalink)
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hahaha, faggoRt alert!
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Old 09-14-2003, 03:14 PM   #4 (permalink)
paranoid
 
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Location: The Netherlands

nice
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Old 09-14-2003, 04:57 PM   #5 (permalink)
Eh?
 
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Location: Somewhere over the rainbow
LOl good stuff
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Old 09-15-2003, 05:42 AM   #6 (permalink)
Insane
 
that's hilarious -- reminds me of Wilson and Tim Taylor
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Old 09-15-2003, 07:17 AM   #7 (permalink)
In Your Dreams
 
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Location: City of Lights
hahaha that's great... I can't believe I didn't see where it was going hehe.
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Old 09-15-2003, 07:34 AM   #8 (permalink)
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Location: Stillwater, OK
hehe...good stuff! Deductive reasoning is not for the weak minded...
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Old 09-15-2003, 08:44 AM   #9 (permalink)
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Location: where happiness lives
OMG . . . I don't have a dog house either. AAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!
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Old 09-15-2003, 03:10 PM   #10 (permalink)
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Location: NJ (but just for college)
lol thats so funny, i think i may have heard it before, but i completely forgot... its hilarious!
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Old 09-15-2003, 05:23 PM   #11 (permalink)
Insane
 
Location: Calgary, AB
that was great :P
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no substance
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Old 09-15-2003, 06:56 PM   #12 (permalink)
Insane
 
Location: Milwaukee
glad you all like it
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Old 09-15-2003, 06:59 PM   #13 (permalink)
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Location: North Carolina
hehe, nice.
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Old 09-15-2003, 08:10 PM   #14 (permalink)
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Location: Nor Cal
Good one )
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Old 09-15-2003, 10:51 PM   #15 (permalink)
back from sabbatical
 
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Location: Mosptopia
Good one, thanks.
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Old 09-17-2003, 08:10 AM   #16 (permalink)
Insane
 
loved it
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Old 09-17-2003, 08:16 AM   #17 (permalink)
Insane
 
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Location: Foregin student in Texas atm.
haha
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Old 09-17-2003, 01:40 PM   #18 (permalink)
paj
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thats highlarious
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Old 09-29-2003, 06:11 AM   #19 (permalink)
absolute relativist
 
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Location: D.C.
bwahhhh. very good one. thanks
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Old 09-29-2003, 06:30 AM   #20 (permalink)
Shackle Me Not
 
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Location: Newcastle - England.
Great joke. It's a keeper.
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Old 10-06-2003, 11:21 PM   #21 (permalink)
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Location: CFB Gagetown, NB, CANADA
I almost spit BEER when I read this! BEER I say!!! do you know what could have happened? I could have wasted... BEER!!!!!!!!!!!

thanks
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Last edited by JadziaDax; 10-07-2003 at 01:27 AM..
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Old 10-06-2003, 11:33 PM   #22 (permalink)
Upright
 
thats pretty peachy
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Old 10-07-2003, 02:17 AM   #23 (permalink)
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Location: Drifting.
bahaha, that is deductive reasoning at its finest
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Old 10-07-2003, 09:02 AM   #24 (permalink)
It wasnt me
 
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Location: Scotland
I love this kind of joke! Excellent.
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Old 10-07-2003, 10:15 AM   #25 (permalink)
Searching for the perfect brew!
 
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Cleaver joke! They are the best! Thanks
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Old 10-07-2003, 10:38 AM   #26 (permalink)
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Location: CT
lol!!!! that was awesome!!!
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Old 10-07-2003, 10:51 AM   #27 (permalink)
Addict
 
this is funny, but this is more inductive than deductive reasoning. ok i'll shut up now.
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Old 10-08-2003, 07:52 PM   #28 (permalink)
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Location: 1 mile from Ground Zero
Talk about jumping to wrong conclusions! Good one.


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