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Old 08-30-2003, 12:53 PM   #1 (permalink)
It's All About The Ass!!
 
K-Wise's Avatar
 
Location: In a pool of mayonnaise!!
So some guy finds a genie bottle on the beach......

He rubs it and a Genie comes out. The Genie says "You caught me at a really bad time and I can only give you one wish so you better make it good" So the guy thinks for a little bit and replies with "I really hate flying, and I hate sailing even more but I really wanna take a vaction to Hawaii....So could you build me a highway that stretches all the way across to Hawaii so I can just drive there?" The Genie replies saying: "Oh thats way too big you gotta think of something else man do you know how hard that would be?" so the guy thinks a little more and he's like...."Okay I got it. I would like to be able to understand women!"....So the Genie sighs rolls his eyes and replies "Okay do you want 2 lanes or 4 lanes?" ...... (do the drum thingy!)

Okay if you've heard it before just pretend you haven't so I don't feel like a total jackass. Thank you for your time I'll be here all week...maybe...probably....yeah

Asta!!
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Old 08-30-2003, 01:35 PM   #2 (permalink)
Crazy
 
Location: Springfield, VA
I would want 4 lanes.
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Old 08-30-2003, 01:41 PM   #3 (permalink)
Go Ninja, Go Ninja Go!!
 
Location: IN, USA
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Old 08-30-2003, 03:39 PM   #4 (permalink)
Crazy
 
HAHA i heard one like but about world peace...they all Good
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Old 08-31-2003, 12:00 AM   #5 (permalink)
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Location: The Land Down Under
For the English: I heard this one about Charles running over one of the Royal Corgis. The genie couldn't bring it back to life, so Charles asked it to make Carmilla beautiful. The genie thought for a second, and said, 'let's take another look at that corgi'
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Old 08-31-2003, 12:35 AM   #6 (permalink)
It's All About The Ass!!
 
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Location: In a pool of mayonnaise!!
LMFAO ya know the funny thing is...I own a Pembroke Welsh Corgi. She's a pain in the ass. Ya know them herding dogs if I'm walking and I don't acknowledge her she starts nipping my heels and biting my ass. Really annoying but she's fuckin adorable so I resist the temptation to smack her. Weird dogs too....we didn't know what the hell she was when we were gonna buy her. No one else does either...they think she's a mutt like a Datsund mix...and they refer to her as "That weird lookin dog..." sometimes.

Asta!!
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It ain't goodbye, it's see ya later! I'll miss you guys! - Asta!!
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Old 09-01-2003, 11:35 PM   #7 (permalink)
Psycho
 
Location: OMFG BRB
ba dum dum PISHHH

(the drum thingy)
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Old 09-02-2003, 07:23 PM   #8 (permalink)
Insane
 
Location: Australia
I gotta admit, thats a new one for me....... I like it.....
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Old 09-03-2003, 12:02 AM   #9 (permalink)
It's All About The Ass!!
 
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Location: In a pool of mayonnaise!!
I got a bajillion!

Asta!!
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Old 09-24-2003, 10:02 PM   #10 (permalink)
Psycho
 
Location: Somewhere between the Havens and the Earth
I want to understand men and a horsey!!
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Old 09-24-2003, 11:54 PM   #11 (permalink)
Omnipotent Ruler Of The Tiny Universe In My Mind
 
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Location: Oreegawn
that's too awesome. genie jokes are always good.
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If you could really get to know someone and know that they weren't lying to you, then you would know the world was real. Because you could agree on things, you could compare notes. That must be why people get married or make Art. So they'll be able to really know something and not go insane.
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Old 09-25-2003, 07:22 PM   #12 (permalink)
Who knows what evil lurks in the hearts of men?
 
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Location: right here of course
not new, but always a funny one
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Old 09-25-2003, 09:21 PM   #13 (permalink)
2+2=5? Not again!
 
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Location: Dallas, Texas
First time I've heard it. Thanks K-Wise.
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Old 09-28-2003, 03:40 PM   #14 (permalink)
change is hard.
 
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Location: the green room.
it's all about the genies that bitch alot... Thats why ur here! TO GIVE US WISHES!
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