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08-21-2003, 10:15 PM
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#1 (permalink) |
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Insane
Location: Australia
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Ugly
A bus carrying only ugly people crashes into an oncoming truck, and everyone inside dies. They then get to meet their maker, and because of the grief they have experienced; he decides to grant them one wish each, before they enter Paradise.
They're all lined up, and God asks the first one what the wish is. "I want to be gorgeous," and so God snaps His fingers, and it is done. The second one in line hears this and says "I want to be gorgeous too." Another snap of His fingers and the wish is granted. This goes on for a while but when God is halfway down the line, the last guy in line starts laughing. When there are only ten people left, this guy is rolling on the floor, laughing his arse off. Finally, God reaches this guy and asks him what his wish will be. The guy calms down and says:" Make 'em all ugly again
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Anyone who goes to a psychiatrist ought to have his head examined. Samuel Goldwyn |
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08-22-2003, 04:10 PM
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#6 (permalink) |
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Junkie
Location: In the middle of the desert.
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That cracks me up! That's like the one about the bear and the rabbit who met the genie and each got a wish. The bear asked for all the neighboring bears to be horny females, and the rabbit wished for the bear to be gay...
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DEMOCRACY is where your vote counts, FEUDALISM is where your count votes. |
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08-22-2003, 11:33 PM
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#9 (permalink) |
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Eccentric insomniac
Location: North Carolina
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That's hilarious. It would be almost worth using your only wish.
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"Socialism is a philosophy of failure, the creed of ignorance, and the gospel of envy, its inherent virtue is the equal sharing of misery." - Winston Churchill "All men dream: but not equally. Those who dream by night in the dusty recesses of their minds wake in the day to find that it was vanity: but the dreamers of the day are dangerous men, for they may act out their dream with open eyes, to make it possible." Seven Pillars of Wisdom, T.E. Lawrence |
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08-23-2003, 03:03 AM
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#13 (permalink) |
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Lust Puppy
Location: in your closet and in your head...
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Brought tears to my eyes......!
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Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections? Only in America......do we use the word 'politics' to describe the process so well: 'Poli' in Latin meaning 'many' and 'tics' meaning 'bloodsucking creatures'. |
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08-29-2003, 11:36 AM
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#29 (permalink) |
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Omnipotent Ruler Of The Tiny Universe In My Mind
Location: Oreegawn
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hehe, so cruel...i love it
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Words of Wisdom: If you could really get to know someone and know that they weren't lying to you, then you would know the world was real. Because you could agree on things, you could compare notes. That must be why people get married or make Art. So they'll be able to really know something and not go insane. |
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06-15-2008, 08:59 AM
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#34 (permalink) |
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<3 TFP
Location: 17TLH2445607250
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Soooo many jokes with this premise, yet they all make me chuckle!
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The prospect of achieving a peace agreement with the extremist group of MILF is almost impossible... -- Emmanuel Pinol, Governor of Cotobato My Homepage |
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06-17-2008, 09:49 PM
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#37 (permalink) |
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eats puppies and shits rainbows
Location: An Area of Space Occupied by a Population, SC, USA
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That guy sounds just like me.
Only ugly, of course.
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It's a rare pleasure in this world to get your mind fucked. Usually it's just foreplay. M.B. Keene |
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03-18-2009, 01:58 PM
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#39 (permalink) |
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Psycho
Location: Physically in Houston, TX - Mentally Lost in Time
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Really loud laughs here
great joke, thanks 
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Attention everyone: We have another potential asshole in the area ! You don't have bad luck, the reason bad things happen to you is because you're a dumbass !! Dinner $50 Drinks $30 Motel $40 Finding out she swallows - PRICELESS!!! |
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