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Old 08-13-2003, 03:22 AM   #1 (permalink)
comfortably numb...
 
uncle phil's Avatar
 
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Location: upstate
Life Play

THE FACTS OF LIFE


Nothing in the known universe travels faster than a bad check.

A truly wise man never plays leapfrog with a unicorn.

It has recently been discovered that research causes cancer in rats.

Always remember to pillage BEFORE you burn.

If you are given an open-book exam, you will forget your book.

COROLLARY: If you are given a take-home test, you will forget where you live.

The trouble with doing something right the first time is that nobody appreciates how difficult it was.

It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others.

Phil's Law: You can't fall off the floor.

The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.

Paranoids are people, too; they have their own problems. It's easy to criticize, but if everybody hated you, you'd be paranoid, too.

A diplomat is someone who can tell you to go to hell and make you feel happy to be on your way.

Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society.
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"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
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"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
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never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.
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Old 08-13-2003, 04:21 AM   #2 (permalink)
Boy am I horny today
 
absorbentishe's Avatar
 
Location: T O L E D O, Toledo!!
They are all good, but this one is great!

The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.
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Old 08-13-2003, 04:39 AM   #3 (permalink)
These pretzels are making me thirsty!!
 
iktoweya's Avatar
 
Location: 105B
good stuff
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i miss K-Wise
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Old 08-13-2003, 04:52 AM   #4 (permalink)
Insane
 
nice post m8
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