God and Eve - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

GoldenOuroboros · 08-10-2003, 05:45 PM

"What's the problem, Eve?"
I know that you created me and provided this beautiful garden and all of these wonderful animals, as well as that hilarious comedic snake, but I'm just not happy."
"And why is that Eve?"
"God,I am lonely, and I'm sick to death of apples."
"Well, Eve, in that case, I have a solution. I'll create a man for you."
"Man? What is that, God?"
"A flawed creature, with many bad traits. He'll lie, cheat and be vain; all in all, he'll give you a hard time. But he'll be bigger, faster and will like to hunt and kill things. He will look silly when he is aroused, but since you've been complaining, I'll create him in such a way that he'll satisfy your physical needs. He will be witless and will revel in childish things like fighting and kicking a ball about. He won't be too smart, so he'll also need your advice to think properly."
"Sounds great," says Eve, with ironically raised eyebrows, "but what's the catch, God?"
"Well..... you can have him on one condition."
"And what's that God?"
"As I said, he'll be proud, arrogant and self-admiring..... so you'll have to let him believe that I made him first. And it'll have to be our little secret............... you know, woman to woman"

egorey · 08-10-2003, 07:45 PM

nice old joke.. thanks.

bravo49 · 08-11-2003, 02:46 AM

One of the best I've heard in ages

Mantus · 08-11-2003, 04:20 PM

grumble...grumble...i just know its true because if god created Adam first he would have asked for a Playstation 2.

slant eyes · 08-11-2003, 05:58 PM

so how did god impregnate mary? god was a homosexual?

good joke tho.

kel · 08-11-2003, 09:36 PM

lol w00t!

iktoweya · 08-11-2003, 10:53 PM

soopadoopa · 08-12-2003, 05:20 PM

hardy har har

loganmule · 08-12-2003, 08:08 PM

a guy bashing joke, but still ok, although I prefer the one about
Eve swimming and making all the fish smell like pussy

killerjoejoe · 08-12-2003, 08:41 PM

HAHAH...oh wait...im a guy....DAMN!

TerresqueÜ · 08-12-2003, 10:40 PM

Hahahah...

Keg-o-Grog · 08-18-2003, 01:25 PM

"He will look silly when he is aroused"

hey!!

good one

shaman · 08-19-2003, 06:59 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by slant eyes
so how did god impregnate mary? god was a homosexual?

good joke tho.

Not to get in to a relegious debate, but an omnipotent God can do what ever the hell I am who am wants.

cchris · 08-19-2003, 07:10 AM

Great joke

Gnzo · 08-19-2003, 07:14 AM

hehhe

mastboy4 · 08-19-2003, 07:12 PM

hehehe nice joke

08-10-2003, 05:45 PM	#1 (permalink)
GoldenOuroboros The Cheshire Grin... Location: An Aussie Outback	God and Eve "What's the problem, Eve?" I know that you created me and provided this beautiful garden and all of these wonderful animals, as well as that hilarious comedic snake, but I'm just not happy." "And why is that Eve?" "God,I am lonely, and I'm sick to death of apples." "Well, Eve, in that case, I have a solution. I'll create a man for you." "Man? What is that, God?" "A flawed creature, with many bad traits. He'll lie, cheat and be vain; all in all, he'll give you a hard time. But he'll be bigger, faster and will like to hunt and kill things. He will look silly when he is aroused, but since you've been complaining, I'll create him in such a way that he'll satisfy your physical needs. He will be witless and will revel in childish things like fighting and kicking a ball about. He won't be too smart, so he'll also need your advice to think properly." "Sounds great," says Eve, with ironically raised eyebrows, "but what's the catch, God?" "Well..... you can have him on one condition." "And what's that God?" "As I said, he'll be proud, arrogant and self-admiring..... so you'll have to let him believe that I made him first. And it'll have to be our little secret............... you know, woman to woman" __________________ Can you see me grin grin grrriiiiinnnning?!

08-11-2003, 05:58 PM	#5 (permalink)
slant eyes Psycho Location: cali	so how did god impregnate mary? god was a homosexual? good joke tho. __________________ no man or woman is worth your tears - and the one who is, won't make you cry question authority, don't ask why, just do it!

08-11-2003, 09:36 PM	#6 (permalink)
kel WARNING: FLAMMABLE Location: Ask Acetylene	lol w00t! __________________ "It better be funny"

08-11-2003, 10:53 PM	#7 (permalink)
iktoweya These pretzels are making me thirsty!! Location: 105B	meh __________________ i miss K-Wise

08-12-2003, 08:41 PM	#10 (permalink)
killerjoejoe Tilted Location: CANADA!!!	HAHAH...oh wait...im a guy....DAMN! __________________ [Insert Boobies Here]

08-10-2003, 07:45 PM	#2 (permalink)
egorey Crazy	nice old joke.. thanks.

08-11-2003, 02:46 AM	#3 (permalink)
bravo49 Junkie Location: chocolate city	One of the best I've heard in ages

08-11-2003, 04:20 PM	#4 (permalink)
Mantus lascivious	grumble...grumble...i just know its true because if god created Adam first he would have asked for a Playstation 2.

08-12-2003, 05:20 PM	#8 (permalink)
soopadoopa Crazy	hardy har har

08-12-2003, 08:08 PM	#9 (permalink)
loganmule Junkie Location: midwest	a guy bashing joke, but still ok, although I prefer the one about Eve swimming and making all the fish smell like pussy

08-12-2003, 10:40 PM	#11 (permalink)
TerresqueÜ Hiding Out	Hahahah... __________________ Say yes to the 'Tilted Roleplaying' Forum http://www.tfproject.org/tfp/showthread.php?s=&threadid=1932&highlight=petition

08-18-2003, 01:25 PM	#12 (permalink)
Keg-o-Grog Insane Location: Foregin student in Texas atm.	"He will look silly when he is aroused" hey!! good one __________________ I stand alone without beliefs, the only truth i know is you.

08-19-2003, 07:10 AM	#14 (permalink)
cchris Junkie Location: Sydney	Great joke __________________ There's a fine line between participation and mockery

08-19-2003, 07:12 PM	#16 (permalink)
mastboy4 Crazy Location: Mexico	hehehe nice joke __________________ Ignorance Is Bliss