uncle phil

I was in my back yard trying to launch a kite.

I threw the kite up in the air, the wind would catch it for a few seconds, then it would come crashing back down to earth. I tried this a few more times with no success. All the while, my wife Karen is watching from the kitchen window, muttering to herself how men need to be told how to do everything.

She opened the window and yelled to me, 'You need a piece of tail.'

I turned with a confused look on my face and said, 'Make up your mind. Last night, you told me to go fly a kite!'

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"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
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"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
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never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.