ralphie250

A woman is shopping in the local supermarket. She selects some milk, some eggs, a carton of juice, and a package of bacon.
As she unloads her items at the cash register to pay, a man standing behind her in line watches her place the four items on the belt and states with assurance, "You must be single."
The woman looks at the four items on the belt, and seeing nothing unusual about her selection says, "That's right. How on Earth did you know?"
He replies, "Because you're ugly."

__________________
tomorrow i'm taking me fishing, hang a sign on the door of my life,
tell the world i've gone missing and i wont be back for a while.

uncle phil

sorry, ralphie...

__________________
"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
-----------------------------------------
"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
-----------------------------------------
never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.

DontKnockIt

The funny meter is fantastic and looks to work too.

__________________
Yeah I said it, big whoop, wanna fight about it?

Lindy

Reminds me of the one that ends "I saw your class ring when you were picking your nose."