Wanda and Sylvia - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

uncle phil · 11-23-2009, 03:28 AM

Two Ladies Talking in Heaven

1st woman: Hi! Wanda.

2nd woman: Hi! Sylvia. How'd you die?

1st woman: I froze to death.

2nd woman: How horrible!

1st woman: It wasn't so bad. After I quit shaking from the cold, I began to get warm & sleepy, and finally died a peaceful death. What about you?

2nd woman: I died of a massive heart attack. I suspected that my husband was cheating, so I came home early to catch him in the act. But instead, I found him all by himself in the den watching TV.

1st woman: So, what happened?

2nd woman: I was so sure there was another woman there somewhere that I started running all over the house looking. I ran up into the attic and searched, and down into the basement. Then I went through every closet and checked under all the beds. I kept this up until I had looked everywhere, and finally became so exhausted that I just keeled over with a heart attack and died.

1st woman: Too bad you didn't look in the freezer - we'd both still be alive...

Lady Bear Cub · 11-23-2009, 11:29 AM

LMAO! I was going to post this one.. only I had heard it as two men.

11-23-2009, 03:28 AM	#1 (permalink)
uncle phil comfortably numb... Super Moderator Location: upstate	Wanda and Sylvia Two Ladies Talking in Heaven 1st woman: Hi! Wanda. 2nd woman: Hi! Sylvia. How'd you die? 1st woman: I froze to death. 2nd woman: How horrible! 1st woman: It wasn't so bad. After I quit shaking from the cold, I began to get warm & sleepy, and finally died a peaceful death. What about you? 2nd woman: I died of a massive heart attack. I suspected that my husband was cheating, so I came home early to catch him in the act. But instead, I found him all by himself in the den watching TV. 1st woman: So, what happened? 2nd woman: I was so sure there was another woman there somewhere that I started running all over the house looking. I ran up into the attic and searched, and down into the basement. Then I went through every closet and checked under all the beds. I kept this up until I had looked everywhere, and finally became so exhausted that I just keeled over with a heart attack and died. 1st woman: Too bad you didn't look in the freezer - we'd both still be alive... __________________ "We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done." - Robert S. McNamara ----------------------------------------- "We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches... We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles." - Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message" ----------------------------------------- never wrestle with a pig. you both get dirty; the pig likes it.

11-23-2009, 11:29 AM	#2 (permalink)
Lady Bear Cub Crazy Location: north carolina	LMAO! I was going to post this one.. only I had heard it as two men. __________________ "I give myself very good advice, But I very seldom follow it, Will I ever learn to do the things I should?"