uncle phil

A crusty old biker out on a long summer ride in the country pulls up to a tavern in the middle of nowhere, parks his bike and walks inside. As he passes through the swinging doors, he sees a sign hanging over the bar:

COLD BEER: $2.00

HAMBURGER: $2.25

CHEESEBURGER: $2.50

CHICKEN SANDWICH: $3.50

HAND JOB: $50.00

Checking his wallet to be sure he has the necessary payment, the ol' biker walks up to the bar and beckons to the exceptionally attractive female bartender who is serving drinks to a couple of sun-wrinkled farmers.

She glides down behind the bar to the ol' biker. "Yes?" she inquires with a wide, knowing smile, "May I help you?"

The ol' biker leans over the bar, "I was wondering young lady," he whispers,
"are you the one who gives the hand-jobs?"

She looks into his eyes with that wide smile and purrs, "Why yes, yes I sure
am".

The ol' biker leans closer and into her left ear whispers softly, "Well, wash your hands real good, 'cause I want a cheeseburger".

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"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
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"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
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never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.

Tully Mars

Ok took a mintue... that's funny.

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I used to drink to drown my sorrows, but the damned things have learned how to swim- Frida Kahlo

Vice President Starkizzer Fan Club

gamefreak1398

hhehe wise indeed

Daniel_

Totally love it.

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╔═════════════════════════════════════════╗
Overhead, the Albatross hangs motionless upon the air,
And deep beneath the rolling waves,
In labyrinths of Coral Caves,
The Echo of a distant time
Comes willowing across the sand;
And everthing is Green and Submarine
╚═════════════════════════════════════════╝

Punk.of.Ages

Dirty old bi-....

Wait a minute. I see what you did there...

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"The fact is that censorship always defeats its own purpose, for it creates, in the end, the kind of society that is incapable of exercising real discretion..." - Henry Steel Commager

"Punk rock music is great music played by really bad, drunk musicians." -Fat Mike