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Old 07-03-2003, 12:12 PM   #1 (permalink)
Insane
 
Location: Steel Town, Ontario
A Canadian Apology

Now that world events have cooled somewhat and people's sense of humour is back I can post this...if it offends you, so what.



A truly Canadian Apology to the USA.... Courtesy of Rick Mercer from This Hour Has 22 Minutes, CBC Television:



On behalf of Canadians everywhere I'd like to offer an apology to the United States of America. We haven't been getting along very well recently and for that, I am truly sorry.
I'm sorry we called George Bush a moron. He is a moron but, it wasn't nice of us to point it out. If it's any consolation, the fact that he's a moron shouldn't reflect poorly on the people of America. After all it's not like you actually elected him.
I'm sorry about our softwood lumber. Just because we have more trees than you doesn't give us the right to sell you lumber that's cheaper and better than your own.
I'm sorry we beat you in Olympic hockey. In our defence I guess our excuse would be that our team was much, much, much, much better than yours.
I'm sorry we burnt down your White House during the war of 1812. I notice you've rebuilt it! It's Very Nice.
I'm sorry about your beer. I know we had nothing to do with your beer but, we feel your pain.
I'm sorry about our waffling on Iraq. I mean, when you're going up against a crazed dictator, you want to have your friends by your side. I realize it took more than two years before you guys pitched in against Hitler, but that was different. Everyone knew he had weapons.
And finally on behalf of all Canadians, I'm sorry that we're constantly apologizing for things in a passive-aggressive way which is really a thinly veiled criticism. I sincerely hope that you're not upset over this. We've seen what you do to countries you get upset with.
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Old 07-03-2003, 03:14 PM   #2 (permalink)
Loser
 
Location: Toronto
Yes!!
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Old 07-03-2003, 04:59 PM   #3 (permalink)
Insane
 
I think this is the third time I've seen this in the Humor forum...
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Old 07-03-2003, 08:17 PM   #4 (permalink)
Psycho
 
Location: cali
at least they're sorry
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Old 07-03-2003, 10:30 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Location: Amazon.com and CDBaby
Apology accept..... HEYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!
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Old 07-03-2003, 11:21 PM   #6 (permalink)
Insane
 
heh, it's kinda funny, but it's gay too.
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Old 07-04-2003, 12:05 AM   #7 (permalink)
Crazy
 
truth speaks volumes
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Old 07-04-2003, 05:10 AM   #8 (permalink)
Getting it.
 
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Super Moderator
Location: Lion City
Rick Mercer is a genius.
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Old 07-04-2003, 09:07 AM   #9 (permalink)
Upright
 
Bwah ha ha ha ha. Liked it. :-D
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Old 07-04-2003, 11:41 AM   #10 (permalink)
Banned
 
Heh
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Old 07-06-2003, 10:09 AM   #11 (permalink)
Junkie
 
Location: chocolate city
I like Canadians
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Old 07-07-2003, 05:41 AM   #12 (permalink)
Insane
 
Location: Steel Town, Ontario
Thanks bravo I like Americans too...
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Old 07-07-2003, 07:41 AM   #13 (permalink)
will always be an Alyson Hanniganite
 
Bill O'Rights's Avatar
 
Location: In the dust of the archives
Yeah, that's the third time for this piece, but y'know what? It's funny every goddamn time.
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Old 07-07-2003, 10:15 AM   #14 (permalink)
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Sad truth is, everyone hates the best =) There's plenty of comedy and filth to dig up on every god damn country on this planet... but then again, no one really cares about most of em.
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Old 07-07-2003, 08:41 PM   #15 (permalink)
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Location: San Francisco
Where's Canada? Never heard of it.
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Old 07-09-2003, 04:49 AM   #16 (permalink)
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Location: USS George Washington
I heard once about how Canada got it's name. There was a bunch of Canucks with a bag full of Scrabble letters pulling them out one by one.

"C, eh?"
"N, eh?"
"D, eh?"

-Mikey
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Old 07-09-2003, 09:40 AM   #17 (permalink)
Insane
 
icy_ca -- Hiliarious! haven't seen the show in awhile, and missed this. Funny...and true!

MikeyChalupa -- also funny, maybe true!

WispOfDespair -- I don't think everyone necessarily hates the best, it's just that everyone who doesn't necessarily LIKE the best is made to feel like they better damn well do so or else...
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Old 07-10-2003, 05:28 PM   #18 (permalink)
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Location: Fort Lauderdale Florida
I like canadians they tast like chicken.
canada trying to be relevent in the 21 century like france in the 20 century or 19 or18 or17 or16 or15 or 14 or13 or 12 or 11 or 10
9.
And what city or port did hitler bomb in canada?
And if we just want oil we will take yours could you stop the U.S.

Last edited by weedline; 07-11-2003 at 02:51 AM..
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