A Canadian Apology - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

icy_ca · 07-03-2003, 12:12 PM

Now that world events have cooled somewhat and people's sense of humour is back I can post this...if it offends you, so what.

A truly Canadian Apology to the USA.... Courtesy of Rick Mercer from This Hour Has 22 Minutes, CBC Television:

On behalf of Canadians everywhere I'd like to offer an apology to the United States of America. We haven't been getting along very well recently and for that, I am truly sorry.
I'm sorry we called George Bush a moron. He is a moron but, it wasn't nice of us to point it out. If it's any consolation, the fact that he's a moron shouldn't reflect poorly on the people of America. After all it's not like you actually elected him.
I'm sorry about our softwood lumber. Just because we have more trees than you doesn't give us the right to sell you lumber that's cheaper and better than your own.
I'm sorry we beat you in Olympic hockey. In our defence I guess our excuse would be that our team was much, much, much, much better than yours.
I'm sorry we burnt down your White House during the war of 1812. I notice you've rebuilt it! It's Very Nice.
I'm sorry about your beer. I know we had nothing to do with your beer but, we feel your pain.
I'm sorry about our waffling on Iraq. I mean, when you're going up against a crazed dictator, you want to have your friends by your side. I realize it took more than two years before you guys pitched in against Hitler, but that was different. Everyone knew he had weapons.
And finally on behalf of all Canadians, I'm sorry that we're constantly apologizing for things in a passive-aggressive way which is really a thinly veiled criticism. I sincerely hope that you're not upset over this. We've seen what you do to countries you get upset with.

Snakeyes · 07-03-2003, 03:14 PM

Yes!!

mpedrummer2 · 07-03-2003, 04:59 PM

I think this is the third time I've seen this in the Humor forum...

slant eyes · 07-03-2003, 08:17 PM

at least they're sorry

grumpyolddude · 07-03-2003, 10:30 PM

Apology accept..... HEYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!

Mitzkrieg · 07-03-2003, 11:21 PM

heh, it's kinda funny, but it's gay too.

Bobdoler · 07-04-2003, 12:05 AM

truth speaks volumes

Charlatan · 07-04-2003, 05:10 AM

Rick Mercer is a genius.

PieceOfCrap · 07-04-2003, 09:07 AM

Bwah ha ha ha ha. Liked it. :-D

Mango · 07-04-2003, 11:41 AM

bravo49 · 07-06-2003, 10:09 AM

I like Canadians

icy_ca · 07-07-2003, 05:41 AM

Thanks bravo I like Americans too...

Bill O'Rights · 07-07-2003, 07:41 AM

Yeah, that's the third time for this piece, but y'know what? It's funny every goddamn time.

WispOfDespair · 07-07-2003, 10:15 AM

Sad truth is, everyone hates the best =) There's plenty of comedy and filth to dig up on every god damn country on this planet... but then again, no one really cares about most of em.

gfandy · 07-07-2003, 08:41 PM

Where's Canada? Never heard of it.

MikeyChalupa · 07-09-2003, 04:49 AM

I heard once about how Canada got it's name. There was a bunch of Canucks with a bag full of Scrabble letters pulling them out one by one.

"C, eh?"
"N, eh?"
"D, eh?"

-Mikey

fizzledorf · 07-09-2003, 09:40 AM

icy_ca -- Hiliarious! haven't seen the show in awhile, and missed this. Funny...and true!

MikeyChalupa -- also funny, maybe true!

WispOfDespair -- I don't think everyone necessarily hates the best, it's just that everyone who doesn't necessarily LIKE the best is made to feel like they better damn well do so or else...

weedline · 07-10-2003, 05:28 PM

I like canadians they tast like chicken.
canada trying to be relevent in the 21 century like france in the 20 century or 19 or18 or17 or16 or15 or 14 or13 or 12 or 11 or 10
9.
And what city or port did hitler bomb in canada?
And if we just want oil we will take yours could you stop the U.S.

07-03-2003, 12:12 PM	#1 (permalink)
icy_ca Insane Location: Steel Town, Ontario	A Canadian Apology Now that world events have cooled somewhat and people's sense of humour is back I can post this...if it offends you, so what. A truly Canadian Apology to the USA.... Courtesy of Rick Mercer from This Hour Has 22 Minutes, CBC Television: On behalf of Canadians everywhere I'd like to offer an apology to the United States of America. We haven't been getting along very well recently and for that, I am truly sorry. I'm sorry we called George Bush a moron. He is a moron but, it wasn't nice of us to point it out. If it's any consolation, the fact that he's a moron shouldn't reflect poorly on the people of America. After all it's not like you actually elected him. I'm sorry about our softwood lumber. Just because we have more trees than you doesn't give us the right to sell you lumber that's cheaper and better than your own. I'm sorry we beat you in Olympic hockey. In our defence I guess our excuse would be that our team was much, much, much, much better than yours. I'm sorry we burnt down your White House during the war of 1812. I notice you've rebuilt it! It's Very Nice. I'm sorry about your beer. I know we had nothing to do with your beer but, we feel your pain. I'm sorry about our waffling on Iraq. I mean, when you're going up against a crazed dictator, you want to have your friends by your side. I realize it took more than two years before you guys pitched in against Hitler, but that was different. Everyone knew he had weapons. And finally on behalf of all Canadians, I'm sorry that we're constantly apologizing for things in a passive-aggressive way which is really a thinly veiled criticism. I sincerely hope that you're not upset over this. We've seen what you do to countries you get upset with. __________________ After all is said and done, more is said than done.

07-03-2003, 04:59 PM	#3 (permalink)
mpedrummer2 Insane	I think this is the third time I've seen this in the Humor forum... __________________ My sig can beat up your honor student.

07-03-2003, 08:17 PM	#4 (permalink)
slant eyes Psycho Location: cali	at least they're sorry __________________ no man or woman is worth your tears - and the one who is, won't make you cry question authority, don't ask why, just do it!

07-03-2003, 10:30 PM	#5 (permalink)
grumpyolddude Deliberately unfocused Location: Amazon.com and CDBaby	Apology accept..... HEYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!! __________________ "Regret can be a harder pill to swallow than failure .With failure you at least know you gave it a chance..." David Howard

07-04-2003, 12:05 AM	#7 (permalink)
Bobdoler Crazy	truth speaks volumes __________________ woot

07-03-2003, 03:14 PM	#2 (permalink)
Snakeyes Loser Location: Toronto	Yes!!

07-03-2003, 11:21 PM	#6 (permalink)
Mitzkrieg Insane	heh, it's kinda funny, but it's gay too.

07-04-2003, 05:10 AM	#8 (permalink)
Charlatan Getting it. Super Moderator Location: Lion City	Rick Mercer is a genius. __________________ "My hands are on fire. Hands are on fire. Ain't got no more time for all you charlatans and liars." - Old Man Luedecke

07-04-2003, 09:07 AM	#9 (permalink)
PieceOfCrap Upright	Bwah ha ha ha ha. Liked it. :-D

07-06-2003, 10:09 AM	#11 (permalink)
bravo49 Junkie Location: chocolate city	I like Canadians

07-07-2003, 05:41 AM	#12 (permalink)
icy_ca Insane Location: Steel Town, Ontario	Thanks bravo I like Americans too... __________________ After all is said and done, more is said than done.

07-07-2003, 07:41 AM	#13 (permalink)
Bill O'Rights will always be an Alyson Hanniganite Location: In the dust of the archives	Yeah, that's the third time for this piece, but y'know what? It's funny every goddamn time. __________________ "I distrust those people who know so well what God wants them to do because I notice it always coincides with their own desires." - Susan B. Anthony "Hedonism with rules isn't hedonism at all, it's the Republican party." - JumpinJesus It is indisputable that true beauty lies within...but a nice rack sure doesn't hurt.

07-07-2003, 10:15 AM	#14 (permalink)
WispOfDespair Upright	Sad truth is, everyone hates the best =) There's plenty of comedy and filth to dig up on every god damn country on this planet... but then again, no one really cares about most of em.

07-07-2003, 08:41 PM	#15 (permalink)
gfandy Upright Location: San Francisco	Where's Canada? Never heard of it.

07-09-2003, 04:49 AM	#16 (permalink)
MikeyChalupa Squid Location: USS George Washington	I heard once about how Canada got it's name. There was a bunch of Canucks with a bag full of Scrabble letters pulling them out one by one. "C, eh?" "N, eh?" "D, eh?" -Mikey

07-04-2003, 11:41 AM	#10 (permalink)
Mango Banned	Heh

07-09-2003, 09:40 AM	#17 (permalink)
fizzledorf Insane	icy_ca -- Hiliarious! haven't seen the show in awhile, and missed this. Funny...and true! MikeyChalupa -- also funny, maybe true! WispOfDespair -- I don't think everyone necessarily hates the best, it's just that everyone who doesn't necessarily LIKE the best is made to feel like they better damn well do so or else...

07-10-2003, 05:28 PM	#18 (permalink)
weedline Upright Location: Fort Lauderdale Florida	I like canadians they tast like chicken. canada trying to be relevent in the 21 century like france in the 20 century or 19 or18 or17 or16 or15 or 14 or13 or 12 or 11 or 10 9. And what city or port did hitler bomb in canada? And if we just want oil we will take yours could you stop the U.S. Last edited by weedline; 07-11-2003 at 02:51 AM..