Walks into a bar...
 

So a Giraffe walks into a bar and says: "hey everyone, hi-balls on me."

Peace,
Pierre

So, a whale walks into a bar, approaches the bartender and says:

"wwhhhahrrrrrllllllaarrrgghh"

So, a skeleton walks into a bar, says "Barkeep, I want a beer........................................ and a mop"

oldies are goodies

A man walks into a bar ... ouch!

Two guys walk into the pub

The first guy says to the barman "I'll have a pint of best, and the same for this donkey" indicating his mate

The barman pours the drinks and then says to the other guy "hey, why does this fella call you a donkey?"

The guy replies
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"EEYORE!!! EEYORE!!! 'E Always calls me that"

A minister, a priest, and a rabbi walk into a bar and the bartender asks,"is this some kinda joke?"

A drunk walks out of a bar and sees a nun standing at a bus stop. He walks up to her and punches her in the face. When she falls to the ground, he starts screaming, "You're not so tough now, are you, Batman?"

A man from North Carolina goes into a bar in New England. He asks the bartender, "Did you go to Harvard?" The bartender says, "Yale." The North Carolinan says, "DID YOU GO TO HARVARD?"

A cheeseburger walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender says "Sorry, we don't serve food here."

A piece of string walks into a bar and orders a beer, the barkeep says, "sorry, we don't serve pieces of string in this bar."
Distraught, the string walks out the door and is gone for a few minutes, then comes back in looking to be in terrible shape. He is twisted up, and his ends are all over the place with string fibers everywhere. The bartender looks at him and says "sorry, we STILL don't serve pieces of string in here... Don't you have anywhere else to get a drink?" The String looks heartbroken and says...


I'm a Frayed Knot!

two guys walk into a bar....









....third one ducked!

And a man from North Carolina groans......

Two atoms walk out of a bar, one says, "I think I might have lost an electron", the other asks, "are you sure?" to which the other replies, "I'm positive!".

a horse walks into the bar and the bartender says" hey, we don't allow animals in here." (as opposed to "why the long face?")

Descartes walks into a bar and the bartender asks "Do you want a beer?".
Descartes responds "I think not".
Poof. Descartes disappears.