uncle phil

Two brooms were hanging in the closet and after a while they got to know each other so well, they decided to get married.

One broom was, of course, the bride broom, the other the groom broom.

The bride broom looked very beautiful in her white dress. The groom broom was handsome and suave in his tuxedo. The wedding was lovely.

After the wedding, at the wedding dinner, the bride-broom leaned over and said to the groom-broom, 'I think I am going to have a little whisk broom!'


'IMPOSSIBLE !' said the groom broom. 'WE HAVEN'T EVEN SWEPT TOGETHER!'

(methinks she's been sweeping around...)

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"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
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"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
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never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.

KellyC

Ohhhh Phil....you crack me up again.

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Him: Ok, I have to ask, what do you believe?
Me: Shit happens.

gamefreak1398

lol what a groaner

Iliftrocks

agghhhhh, so bad


I did laugh though, so I guess I'm a little cracked

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bill hicks - "I don't mean to sound bitter, cold, or cruel, but I am, so that's how it comes out."