Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community  

Go Back   Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community > Interests > Tilted Humor


 
 
LinkBack Thread Tools
Old 02-09-2008, 11:31 AM   #1 (permalink)
Tilted
 
buttless1der's Avatar
 
Location: Willamette Valley
Gods little brother

Is it just me or does this planet have a crapload of screwed up animals or what?!? I always hear people asking how a loving god would let such horrible things happen such as tornados and other natural disasters but they never mention the goddamn animals. I can explain it with one word: Bob*. Bob is Gods little brother who can't keep his hands off other peoples stuff.

As we all know God rested on the 7th day and that's where the trouble began. God was in the den knocking back a bottle sacremental wine while Bob got into the workshop and started building things out of spare parts. He took the body and head of a beaver and jammed the bill of a duck on it. Then he attatched some webbed feet and put venomous barbs on the back legs of the males. To top off the whole thing he made the thing lay eggs. Yes folks, I present you with the platypus.
Do you have a better explaination? Huh?!

Some people believe Bob is also responsible for spiders, but he is not. God had no choice in that, if he hadn't we would be up to our armpits in insects. I think spiders are the worst consequence of this foul up. I can't stand those things, they scare the hell out of me.

This is why I believe Bob must die.


*When I first concocted this crap Bob was called Stewie, but then Family Guy came out and it just seemed too close to character.
buttless1der is offline  
Old 02-09-2008, 11:33 AM   #2 (permalink)
Aurally Fixated
 
allaboutmusic's Avatar
 
Uh... what?

Why is this in Tilted Humor?
allaboutmusic is offline  
Old 02-09-2008, 12:02 PM   #3 (permalink)
Tilted
 
buttless1der's Avatar
 
Location: Willamette Valley
Because it neither supports or refutes the existence of God. It's just a funny thought.
buttless1der is offline  
Old 02-09-2008, 12:20 PM   #4 (permalink)
Minion of Joss
 
levite's Avatar
 
Location: The Windy City
Wow. You've come up with Dualism. What a hoot.
__________________
Dull sublunary lovers love,
Whose soul is sense, cannot admit
Absence, because it doth remove
That thing which elemented it.

(From "A Valediction: Forbidding Mourning" by John Donne)
levite is offline  
Old 02-09-2008, 12:23 PM   #5 (permalink)
... a sort of licensed troubleshooter.
 
Willravel's Avatar
 
Funny is in the eye of the beholder.
Willravel is offline  
Old 02-09-2008, 12:32 PM   #6 (permalink)
Tilted
 
buttless1der's Avatar
 
Location: Willamette Valley
Oh I'm so damn hurt.
buttless1der is offline  
Old 02-09-2008, 12:36 PM   #7 (permalink)
Asshole
 
The_Jazz's Avatar
 
Administrator
Location: Chicago
From the Rules of Tilted Humor:

Keep your comments constructive.
__________________
"They that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety." - B. Franklin
"There ought to be limits to freedom." - George W. Bush
"We have met the enemy and he is us." - Pogo
The_Jazz is offline  
Old 02-13-2008, 12:09 PM   #8 (permalink)
<3 TFP
 
xepherys's Avatar
 
Location: 17TLH2445607250
I was amused
__________________
The prospect of achieving a peace agreement with the extremist group of MILF is almost impossible...
-- Emmanuel Pinol, Governor of Cotobato


My Homepage
xepherys is offline  
Old 02-13-2008, 11:10 PM   #9 (permalink)
Addict
 
mandy's Avatar
 
Location: Port Elizabeth, South Africa
so was I i can think of a few of Bob's other creation's as well and i think it was a good thought process...i dont think i could ever have come up with it?
__________________
The Imagination equips us to see a reality we have yet to create
mandy is offline  
 

Tags
brother, gods


Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On



All times are GMT -8. The time now is 10:07 PM.

Tilted Forum Project

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2025, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.6.0 PL2
© 2002-2012 Tilted Forum Project

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60 61 62 63 64 65 66 67 68 69 70 71 72 73