Gatorade Frost

Jesus was nailed up on the cross. The crowds were all around him. From on the cross Jesus cries out "John..."

John, hearing this, rushes up to his Lord. Before he can get close a Centurion grabs him and cuts off his right foot and throws him back in the crowd.

Again Jesus cries out "John..."

John again fights his way throughout the crowd. The Centurion grabs him and cuts off his left foot and throws him back.

Jesus cries out yet again "John..."

John drags himself through the crowd with his hands only to meet the same Centurion who cuts of his right hand and throws him back into the crowd.

"John..."

John manages to crawl through the crowd pulling himself along the ground by his left and manages to sneak past the Centurion this time. He drags himself over to the cross and looks up at his Master and says "I am here my Lord. What is it?"

Jesus says "John... I can see your house from up here."

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I got in a fight one time with a really big guy, and he said, "I'm going to mop the floor with your face." I said, "You'll be sorry." He said, "Oh, yeah? Why?" I said, "Well, you won't be able to get into the corners very well."
Emo Philips

jorgelito

Oh my God, that was laugh out loud funny. I think I am going to hell...