Always a good time for Quickies.
 

Q: What's a proctologist?
A: A crack investigator.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Two clergymen were discussing the decline in morals in the modern world. "I didn't sleep with my wife before I was married," said one clergyman self-righteously, "Did you?"

"I don't know," said the other. "What was her maiden name?"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Grandpa's advice:
"Don't marry a woman with big hands. It'll makes your dick look smaller."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Q: What do you call an anorexic with a yeast infection?
A: A quarter-pounder with cheese.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Q: Did you hear about the lesbian who wanted to diversify her business interests?
A: She eventually had a finger in everybody's pie!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Q: Why was the nearsighted fly starving?
A: He couldn't see shit.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Sam comes home very late, and very drunk, and his wife is waiting for him at the door. She says, "You've been out fucking around, haven't you?"

He says, "Nope."

She says, "Then explain the lipstick on your shirt."

He says, "That's easy. I used my shirt to wipe off my dick."


Glad

Those were good!

Grandpa was a smart man!

All good stuff, thanks :)

Haha, that last one is great.

The lipstick one creased me

Q: Why do women get their belly buttons pierced?
A: Where else would they hang the air freshener?

Q: What do lesbians do after an argument?
A: They go home and lick each others wounds.

Q: If I had a rooster, and you had a donkey, and your donkey ate my rooster's legs...what would you have?

A: Two feet of my cock in your ass.


So a dyslexic walks into a bra . . .

Makes more sense this way.

Still funny :)

The Darker Fire Within

good stuff in those posts

bongobong,
good follow up!

glad

last one was gold!