Ode to My shorts
 

This is for everyone who had to get out their summer clothes, and found them to be a wee bit small...

Hello my little pair of shorts
Haven't seen you for a while
I used to wear you at the beach
You used to make me smile

I unearthed you up from underneath
A gigantic pile of clothes
Althought they all used to fit
They now are full of woes

Oh, my little pair of shorts!
I used to wear you when it was sunny
But now there is a bigger problem
And the problem is my tummy

You start so fine down at my feet
You even pass my calves
But in order to pass my thunder thighs
I need to be split into halves

Once upon a time you fit
You looked quite dashing, too
But now you strain around my knees
A horrid sight to view

What a sorry state of life
To be defeated by my shorts
Perhaps I should take up some jogging
Or at the very least some sports

So you, my shorts, are why I sit
And pedal oh so fast
So one day you'll be off the floor
And covering my ass!

Maybe it isn't your tummy. Maybe your dick just got huge over the winter.

I HAVE A PENIS??? AAAAAAA!!!! WHAT ARE THESE HUGE BUMPS ON MY CHEST THEN???

It will take careful physical and oral examination to reach a conclusion for that question.

I believe Miss Sage is female... then again I have known men with bigger... "bumps" than mine hahahahahahaha!