The Wife vs. The Mistress
 

It was with much dismay that Rachael discovered her husband Hymie had a mistress. Rachael, however, was not the sort to kill the golden goose; rather, she decided to find out what the mistress had that she didn't in an effort to win him back.

After a long interrogation Hymie finally relented. "Well, to tell you the truth, Rachael, you are too cold," he said. "When we make love you don't do anything. You just lay there, whereas she moans and groans with feeling."

Is that all? thought Rachael. Is that really all there is to it?

That night she dressed in her most alluring lingerie, slipped Hymie a shot of his favorite cognac and got him into bed. As he started getting heated up she decided to give him her most passionate moans and groans.

"Oh Hymie, darling!" she began. "I've had the most terrible day! Our shares dropped two points, the maid quit, and you don't give me enough housekeeping money...."

Funny Sirlance.

Hmm...not sure that's what he had in mind! That's funny.