that is bad bad bad, but it made me laugh :lol:

Oh gross... but hehe thats sooooo funny!

LOL that is damn funny :D.

That's just evil.

Needless to say, I'll be telling it tomorrow.

Hehehe.. true!

hehe, thanks.

>winces< That's awesome

Nasty

Gorss heh

You're a sick man Mikey....sick, but funny.

what did the snail say while riding on the turtle's back???


wheeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

thats just down right wrong

man that is so wrong. I can't figure out while I'm still chuckling though. Thanks

Q: Why does the Easter Bunny hide his eggs?


A: He doesn't want anyone to know he's been fucking chickens.

Q. Did you here about the guy who drowned in his muesli?

A. A strong current pulled him in.


Q: Why did Mickey Mouse divorce Minnie Mouse?

A: Because she was fucking Goofy


Q: How did the farmer find his sheep in the long grass?

A: Very satifying


Q: Whats green and smells like pork?

A: Kermits finger

Sick, sick, sick!

lol

Oh man... thats just wrong!

I should be grossed out. Why can't I stop laughing?

Sick Sick Sick



But funny

OH NO!!!!!!! thats just horrible ....ly funny!!!!!!!!!

Sounds pretty inappropriate to me. Forced anal sex as a child? Not cool.

ok, it made me giggle too.

I've always liked brocolli

completely sick... but hilarious...

sick but I couldn't help but laugh. thanks

Haha that's horrible.

hehe...good one...i love brocollis tho...well that's besides the point

Q: How do you titilate an ocelot?

A: Oscillate its tits a lot.

How do you get a nun pregnant?




Ya fuck 'er!

horrible joke...

Why is 6 scared of 7?


Cuz 7 8 9 (cuz 7 ate 9...)

Booooo!!!!!!!!!!!!

OK Something to make up for that last one...

GREAT ONE-LINERS...
1) My husband and I divorced over religious differences. He thought he was God and I didn't!
2) I don't suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it.
3) I Work Hard Because Millions On Welfare Depend on Me!
4) Some people are alive only because it's illegal to kill them.
5) I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.
6) Don't take life too seriously; no one gets out alive.
7) You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me.
8) Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.
9) Earth is the insane asylum for the universe.
10) Quoting one is plagiarism; quoting many is research.
11) I'm not a complete idiot -- some parts are missing.
12) Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.
13) NyQuil, the stuffy, sneezy, why-the-heck-is-the-room-spinning medicine.
14) God must love stupid people; he made so many.
15) The gene pool could use a little chlorine.
16) It IS as BAD as you think, and they ARE out to get you.
17) Consciousness: that annoying time between naps.
18) Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?
19) MOP AND GLOW - Floor wax used by Three Mile Island cleanup team.
20) Being "over the hill" is much better than being under it!
21) Wrinkled Was Not One of the Things I Wanted to Be When I Grew up.
22) Procrastinate Now!
23) My Dog Can Lick Anyone.
24) I Have a Degree in Liberal Arts; Do You Want Fries With That?
25) FAILURE IS NOT AN OPTION. It comes bundled with the software.
26) A hangover is the wrath of grapes.
27) A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance.
28) STUPIDITY IS NOT A HANDICAP. Park elsewhere!
29) They call it PMS because Mad Cow Disease was already taken.
30) He who dies with the most toys is nonetheless dead.
31) A PICTURE IS WORTH A THOUSAND WORDS, but it uses up three thousand times the memory.
32) HAM AND EGGS - A day's work for a chicken, a lifetime commitment for a pig.
33) The trouble with life is there's no background music.
34) The original point and click interface was a Smith and Wesson

God put me one this earth to acomplish a certain number of things.

At the moment im so far behind i'll never die

Did you see the latest pirate movie?

No? Probably because it was rate AAAARRRRRR!

Two fish are in a tank. One says to the other "You drive. I'll man the guns."

did u know gullible isnt listed in the dictionary

How many dyslexics does it change to take a lightbulb?

Man goes to fancy dress party, wearing nothing but a jam jar on his penis.
A lady asked what he is, he says fireman... break glass, pull knob, I’ll come as fast as I can!



HHAAAAA!!!!!!!!!




"A TV may insult your intelligence, but nothing rubs it in like a computer!"





"Women say they feel more comfortable undressing in front of men than they do undressing in front of other women. They say that women are too judgmental, whereas, of course, men are just grateful.”






“In the last couple of months I have seen the ads for the Wonder Bra. Is that really a problem in the world?
Men not paying enough attention to women’s breasts?”

What do you call a door that isnt a door?

a Jar (ajar: partly open)

Whats the difference?
 

Dont know if this ones been posted here before but here goes.

Whats the difference between a smart midget and a vaginal disease?
Ones a cunning runt and the other's a running cunt.