I used to go to the beach for a week every summer with college friends. Lotsa beer, ogling women, cheap sensations with loose girls...

What magazine do you really look forward to getting in your mailbox?

Toronto Life: It's sort of like Vanity Fair, but for Toronto. Lately it's been focussing too heavily on shopping and "lifestyle" articles, so it's lost some of its lustre for me. It's the only magazine I subscribe to. I'd also like to get Harper's and Light and Sound America (a trade mag)

What's the first meal you'd request after a long exile on a desert isle eating only fish and vegetation?

Open faced grilled cheese, tomato, and bacon sammich on rye bread with dijon mustard, a side order of parmesean fries and a huge glass of iced tea (unsweetened)

What is being in love like?

It is the feeling of being completely accepted as I am. It is completely accepting - and being happy/content about it - of the other person. It is beyond infatuation - more full, less rushed - but still finding yourself smiling just talking to that person. It is awareness that the other person isn't perfect, but doesn't need to be.

It is giving and taking in equal measure, and being who I am, and still more than enough.

Do you like yourself most mornings?

Not unconditionally, no. You know how there are really good people who seem to only focus on their shortcomings? I'm like that except for the "good" part.

I find trying to adopt a Taoist attitude helps occasionally.

What was third grade like for you?

Third grade is when I first considered suicide.

What the wisest thing you have ever said?

Fuck politicians.


Do you have a best friend? How long have you known them?

yes, my wife, and i've known "them" for over 40 years...


do you own a world atlas?

No, but I own a road atlas that I got for Christmas. It is in my backseat.

How do you take your eggs?

Sunny side up.

We all have some regrets in our lives. What is your one single major regret? How would your life be different, had you turned left instead of right?

Hating school since 1st grade. I could have been, like, a brain surgeon, or a rocket scientist. And that would have indirectly caused my mother and me to move to Mexico at about the same time.

Do you like to cook? If so, what's your favorite recipie?

I like to cook. I worked as a assistant chef at an Italian restaurant in college. I think my favorite is whole chicken, coated in basil and sesame seeds, withcitrus fruit on the inside.

Are you following the olympics at all?

Are you kidding? Hell, yes! The tv is on 24-7, my homepage is changed to the CBC's Olympic site, and my MSN Messenger handle is changing everyday to reflect the AWESOME and OUTSTANDING and MOST EXCELLENT way that our women's team is KICKING ASS all over Turin. which is kind of funny, cause I'm not a sports guy at all, but when the Olympics are on, I turn into a fanatic

don't you just love Peanut Butter?

mmm peanutbutter... creamy or chunky - depending on my mood - makes banananananas palatable, makes celery taste good, the natural stuff with the inch of oil on the top, or the uber processed ultra creamy Skippy with all the bad stuff in it -- doesn't matter -it's all good... Looove peanut butter....

How easily do you trust people?

I trust most people pretty quickly, and more than once it has come back to bite me in the butt. I guess I think that most people will do the right thing, and boy howdy, retail work will sure ruin that ideal quickly. I guess I haven't learned my lesson yet though, because I am still pretty trusting of people.

What is your guilty pleasure food?

French fries, why can't I quit you? French fries with ketchup.


Have you ever known anybody who put ketchup on eggs?

Yes, yes I have. Me. Once. I secretly liked it. But I know other people who do it also. One of my friends puts hot sauce of his eggs...


What is the largest animal you have ever killed?

Well, I don't hunt. But I have killed animals with my car..luckily no deer. :)
The largest animal I have killed was a snake about 5-6 feet long..I think I didn't stop the car to find out but it took up the whole lane. It made the worst popping sound imaginable. *shudder*

What is your favorite way to spend a day off work?

Drunk on a beach. Everyone should try it.

What would you do if you found yourself in bed with me the next morning?

I would fondle you passionately. Actually, I would probably freak out and do a gravity defying leap to the other side of my room because there was another man in my bed.


What would you do if you woke up to BigBen standing over you with a creepy Jack Nicholson (ala The Shining) smile on his face?

get in touch with the little man who lives in my mouth and hope he's got a plan.


what would you do if you passed out while drunk on a beach on your day off, and when you came to, BigBen was spooned up behind you?

Assume it was all a dream brought on by too much sun, and fall back asleep.

What would you do if you found a little man in your mouth, and it was BigBen?

I'd be shocked and alarmed. He says he's bigger than me. Or he used to. Now he's just quackers, even though he has a picture of geese. Maybe that means he's honkies.

What would you do if you had a little man in your mouth, who's a honky and wants to go to England and see Big Ben?

I'd buy him a ticket, cause everyone needs to realize a dream.


what would you do if your little man from your mouth got to England and on the way to see BigBen was hit by a double-decker bus cause he looked the wrong way first?

Funeral at sea, Viking style!

Poker: 5 card stud or 7 card hold'um?

5 card stud, although I'd rather play Texas Hold'Em.

If you could trade places with a TFP'er for a day, who would you pick and why?

Jumpin Jesus! What's not to like: he looks like a movie star, lives with Shesus (!!!!), and every so often Onodrim comes over and makes out his SO. sounds like a dream to me...


Do you like toast?

Yes. This morning I had two thick slabs of homemade rye toast and four fresh strawberries.



What’s the most disgusting thing you’ve ever eaten?

seaweed. or that time there was a worm in my apple (no i'm not making that up). Ew.

Would you ever go on Fear Factor, and if so, would you win?
(PS, if you would... wtf???) Ahem.

No, I have no use for reality tv (with the exception of TAR), my life is real enough.


Speaking of reality tv, could you survive Survivor?

Edit: Too Slow.

The most disgusting thing I've ever eaten was deep fried Eel in Italy. It was really boney, oily and tasteless. There was also some runny, stinky cheese I had once, but I never knew the name of it.

Re: Fear Factor:No I wouldn't go on. Yet, If I was in better shape, I bet I'd do well on the physical challenges because I'm not afraid of heights and the like. I'd be a disaster at the gross-out tasks though. Also, I'm not an aspiring actor from LA.

Re: Survivor: I'm really out of shape, so no, but I wouldn't get kicked off first. Also, I'm not an aspiring actor from LA.

What's the largest sum of money you've ever found in the street and taken for yourself?

A five dollar bill.



What did you have for breakfast this morning?

This morning I had two thick slabs of homemade rye toast and four fresh strawberries.


Who do you think will be president of the U.S. after the current one?

Pasta and meat sauce.

Have you ever gotten into a car accident?

Just once - somebody rear-ended me.

What's your favorite book?

BattleTech Warrior: Reposte

The book is based on events prior to the start of the fourth successor war. Of course, for those of you who knows of the universe, would know what I'm talking about.

But if its something you guys know...it'll have to be Moby Dick :D

What'd you do on sunday night?

Loathe my job and watch the Sopranos.

What time is your alarm clock set for?

I don't set my alarm :p

Which takes you longer to get ready for: Getting ready for work, or getting ready to go out with your SO (or your date)?

Getting ready for work since I don't have an SO to get ready for :D:D

What do you do for free time on weekends?

In my free time, I love to socialize. Usually there is something going on (i.e. live show, small get together, movie, whatever). That and I like to catch up on my reading.

What is the most incredible experience you've ever had?