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01-18-2006, 06:01 PM
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#81 (permalink) |
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...is a comical chap
Location: Where morons reign supreme
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What do you call a male porn star getting it on?
Answer: A feather boa
__________________
"They say that patriotism is the last refuge to which a scoundrel clings; steal a little and they throw you in jail, steal a lot and they make you king" Formerly Medusa |
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01-19-2006, 02:38 AM
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#82 (permalink) |
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Crazy
Location: Just got into town about an hour ago.
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When a snake asks you what to use to dust his lair, what do you say? (A feather, boa... get it?)
Answer: I think Abraham Lincoln said that.
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Dropping a barbell he points to the sky and says "The suns not yellow, It's chicken!" |
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01-19-2006, 09:36 AM
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#85 (permalink) |
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Getting it.
Super Moderator
Location: Lion City
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A new company that will send someone over to your place of work, to kill them ALL!!!
Answer: My armpit smells funny.
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"My hands are on fire. Hands are on fire. Ain't got no more time for all you charlatans and liars." - Old Man Luedecke |
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01-19-2006, 10:36 AM
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#87 (permalink) |
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"I'm sorry. What was the question?"
Location: Paradise Regained
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Where is that green legume that keeps the princess awake all night standing?
(on a mat. a pea.) Grrrooooooaaannnn Answer: Skin-a-marinky dinky dink
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I have faith in a few things - divinity and grace But even when I'm on my knees I know the devil preys |
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01-19-2006, 01:45 PM
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#89 (permalink) |
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comfortably numb...
Super Moderator
Location: upstate
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who was barry mann?
4 and 20 were in a pie...
__________________
"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done." - Robert S. McNamara ----------------------------------------- "We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches... We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles." - Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message" ----------------------------------------- never wrestle with a pig. you both get dirty; the pig likes it. |
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01-19-2006, 03:59 PM
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#90 (permalink) | |
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Une petite chou
Location: With All Your Base
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How many plums did Little Boy Blue pull out of a... wait, no. How many blackbirds were where?
Broken snowboard laces.
__________________
Here's how life works: you either get to ask for an apology or you get to shoot people. Not both. House Quote:
The question isn’t who is going to let me; it’s who is going to stop me. Ayn Rand
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01-20-2006, 07:30 AM
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#92 (permalink) |
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Crazy
Location: Just got into town about an hour ago.
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What do you call an adhesive strip that tells you one thing and says the opposite when your back is turned.
answer: Not my pants.
__________________
Dropping a barbell he points to the sky and says "The suns not yellow, It's chicken!" |
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01-20-2006, 02:59 PM
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#94 (permalink) | |
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Une petite chou
Location: With All Your Base
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What did the lady in the McDonald's drive-through really want?
purple-people eater.
__________________
Here's how life works: you either get to ask for an apology or you get to shoot people. Not both. House Quote:
The question isn’t who is going to let me; it’s who is going to stop me. Ayn Rand
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01-20-2006, 03:45 PM
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#95 (permalink) |
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comfortably numb...
Super Moderator
Location: upstate
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who were individual members of the minnesota viking's defensive line nicknamed a few years ago?
"Say Hallalujiah!!!"
__________________
"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done." - Robert S. McNamara ----------------------------------------- "We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches... We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles." - Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message" ----------------------------------------- never wrestle with a pig. you both get dirty; the pig likes it. |
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01-20-2006, 08:01 PM
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#96 (permalink) |
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Minion of the scaléd ones
Location: Northeast Jesusland
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According to Jessica Hahn, what does Jimmy Swaggart say in his most extreme moment of passion?
Answer: Two pierced nipples.
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Light a man a fire, and he will be warm while it burns. Set a man on fire, and he will be warm for the rest of his life. |
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01-21-2006, 06:47 AM
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#99 (permalink) | |
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Une petite chou
Location: With All Your Base
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What was Picasso's dog caught chewing on late one night?
nose goblins.
__________________
Here's how life works: you either get to ask for an apology or you get to shoot people. Not both. House Quote:
The question isn’t who is going to let me; it’s who is going to stop me. Ayn Rand
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01-21-2006, 01:52 PM
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#101 (permalink) |
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comfortably numb...
Super Moderator
Location: upstate
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what did hannibal lecter wear to the cobblers' ball?
one trick pony...
__________________
"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done." - Robert S. McNamara ----------------------------------------- "We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches... We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles." - Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message" ----------------------------------------- never wrestle with a pig. you both get dirty; the pig likes it. |
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01-22-2006, 03:15 PM
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#104 (permalink) |
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...is a comical chap
Location: Where morons reign supreme
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What is that hiding in a tupperware bowl in the back of my fridge (eww..not really!)
Answer: A candle in the wind
__________________
"They say that patriotism is the last refuge to which a scoundrel clings; steal a little and they throw you in jail, steal a lot and they make you king" Formerly Medusa |
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01-22-2006, 06:38 PM
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#106 (permalink) |
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Let's put a smile on that face
Location: On the road...
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What I had a hallway full of after my run in with a crappy batch of blank Memorex cd's. Needless to say I WILL NEVER purchase another memorex product again in my life. I have since switched to Maxell and have been completely satisfied and would recomend them to all. (oh yea, I took my cd spindle and threw it out my room into a wall)
Optimus Prime |
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01-22-2006, 07:26 PM
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#107 (permalink) |
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Minion of the scaléd ones
Location: Northeast Jesusland
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What to you call the optimus differentiated over t.
Two blue balls
__________________
Light a man a fire, and he will be warm while it burns. Set a man on fire, and he will be warm for the rest of his life. |
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01-22-2006, 07:33 PM
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#108 (permalink) | |
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Une petite chou
Location: With All Your Base
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What did Little Jack Horner end up with when he couldn't find a napkin?
larry, moe and curly.
__________________
Here's how life works: you either get to ask for an apology or you get to shoot people. Not both. House Quote:
The question isn’t who is going to let me; it’s who is going to stop me. Ayn Rand
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01-22-2006, 07:50 PM
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#109 (permalink) |
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Junkie
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Who are the three greatest men in history?
Answer: A problematic bladder
__________________
http://how-to-spell-ridiculous.com/ |
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01-23-2006, 12:07 PM
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#112 (permalink) |
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Junkie
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what did the homeowner wish he had bought as he was strangled to death with his own phone cord?
Answer: tuna tacos
__________________
http://how-to-spell-ridiculous.com/ |
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01-23-2006, 03:10 PM
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#114 (permalink) | |
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Une petite chou
Location: With All Your Base
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What did the alcoholic find in his cabinet in the midst of the intervention?
manicotti.
__________________
Here's how life works: you either get to ask for an apology or you get to shoot people. Not both. House Quote:
The question isn’t who is going to let me; it’s who is going to stop me. Ayn Rand
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01-25-2006, 10:55 AM
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#117 (permalink) |
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"I'm sorry. What was the question?"
Location: Paradise Regained
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What candies are actually harmful to eat and probably give you cancer, but you don't care because they come in cool, collectable little dispensers.
Ebola Virus
__________________
I have faith in a few things - divinity and grace But even when I'm on my knees I know the devil preys |
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01-25-2006, 11:29 AM
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#118 (permalink) |
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will always be an Alyson Hanniganite
Location: In the dust of the archives
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What is a computer malady, that has two attempts to take down your hard drive, ten files at a time?
A really hot redhead.
__________________
"I distrust those people who know so well what God wants them to do because I notice it always coincides with their own desires." - Susan B. Anthony "Hedonism with rules isn't hedonism at all, it's the Republican party." - JumpinJesus It is indisputable that true beauty lies within...but a nice rack sure doesn't hurt. |
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01-25-2006, 03:33 PM
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#120 (permalink) | |
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Une petite chou
Location: With All Your Base
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What did the stoner end up with when he mistakenly asked the artist for "pot"?
har har. bedside table lamp.
__________________
Here's how life works: you either get to ask for an apology or you get to shoot people. Not both. House Quote:
The question isn’t who is going to let me; it’s who is going to stop me. Ayn Rand
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