Charlatan

I've been sitting here all day and I haven't had a drink! I am soooooo sober.

My GOD! I don't think I've ever been this sober and posting on the interweb... what about you?

Have you ever been as sober as this? I doubt it...



Man, I am going to be hurting tomorrow when this sobriety wears off.

__________________
"My hands are on fire. Hands are on fire. Ain't got no more time for all you charlatans and liars."
- Old Man Luedecke

aberkok

Oh man, me too...just a few hours ago I didn't spend two hours praying to the porcelain goddess after not downing 8 shots of Tequila!

I am so hungunder.

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!check out my new blog! http://arkanamusic.wordpress.com

Warden Gentiles: "It? Perfectly innocent. But I can see how, if our roles were reversed, I might have you beaten with a pillowcase full of batteries."

FngKestrel

Hahah...yeah, me too. After the pub crawl on Saturday, I haven't touched a drink at all. Sober as a goddamn judge.

theguyondacouch

Well im not!

__________________
"Lick my frozen metal ass!"

fresnelly

Oh man! I totally had 4 glasses of water today! I am so hydrated! Woo!

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Building an artificial intelligence that appreciates Mozart is easy. Building an A.I. that appreciates a theme restaurant is the real challenge - Kit Roebuck - Nine Planets Without Intelligent Life

amonkie

I'm so sober my head hurts ... whats the doctor's prescription?

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Calling from deep in the heart, from where the eyes can't see and the ears can't hear, from where the mountain trails end and only love can go... ~~~ Three Rivers Hare Krishna

FngKestrel

Hair of the dog!

bernadette

My parents are visiting... stupid soberville here. *yawn*

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ryfo

Went to the fridge the fredge was bare, went to my wallet the wallet was bare.....gonna be a verrrrrry long weekend!!!!!

Charlatan

I am so on the sobriety wagon I should join, Non-alcoholic beverages anonymous...


Hello my name is Charltan and I don't have a drinking problem.

__________________
"My hands are on fire. Hands are on fire. Ain't got no more time for all you charlatans and liars."
- Old Man Luedecke

ratbastid

Man, I am like... no sheets to the wind right now.

Totally nonshitfaced.

Tophat665

I am SO sorry.
While I am cold sober at the moment, I have a fridge quite literally full of beer, about half of which I made myself.

Flip side is I really can't use it this weekend while I try and get the nicotine out of my system.

__________________
Light a man a fire, and he will be warm while it burns.
Set a man on fire, and he will be warm for the rest of his life.

Daoust

I am so conscious right now.

I am so legally able to drive and operate heavy machinery and firearms.

I am so not going to have a good excuse for staring at that hot teachers tits.

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I have faith in a few things - divinity and grace
But even when I'm on my knees I know the devil preys

Giant Hamburger

I really should go out and operate heavy machinery right now while I have the chance.

Fly

*can't partake in thread*

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BASTARD

SterlingStudios

Charlatan

That's OK flyman... I think I am sober enough for both of us.

I am as sober as a minister's wife on a month of Sundays.

__________________
"My hands are on fire. Hands are on fire. Ain't got no more time for all you charlatans and liars."
- Old Man Luedecke

m0rpheus

My advice is to take 2 shots and call me in... actually dont call just repeat the 2 shots as needed until you cure yourself of your problem.

__________________
"it never got weird enough for me." - Hunter S. Thompson

Charlatan

Well I can safely say that I wasn't all that sober last night and now I am quite hung-over.

Christmas parties can do that to a guy.

__________________
"My hands are on fire. Hands are on fire. Ain't got no more time for all you charlatans and liars."
- Old Man Luedecke

Fly

just call me judge fly..............



for now eh!!!!

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BASTARD

SterlingStudios

Charlatan

Wow. This might be a first.

__________________
"My hands are on fire. Hands are on fire. Ain't got no more time for all you charlatans and liars."
- Old Man Luedecke

Fly

don't forget about the "for now" man..........

__________________
BASTARD

SterlingStudios

uncle phil

going out drinking with my golf partner in about five minutes, but right now my breath could grow flowers...

__________________
"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
-----------------------------------------
"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
-----------------------------------------
never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.

Charlatan

So that's why you have a shit eating grin...

__________________
"My hands are on fire. Hands are on fire. Ain't got no more time for all you charlatans and liars."
- Old Man Luedecke

Fly

ahahhhahha...........he fuckin' nailed ya' phil..........



*atta boy Charlie........hit 'em while they're down*

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BASTARD

SterlingStudios

Mantus

Reality creeping in, everything so god damn logical and crystal clear. Naked Lunch has NOTHING on being sober!

Johnny Pyro

I'm high. Would that be considered sober?

__________________
"From delusion lead me to truth, from darkness lead me to light, from death lead me to eternal life. - Sheriff John Wydell

ratbastid

Uh oh! One glass of My Dad's Recipe Egg Nog and... I'm posting in the wrong thread!

Tophat665

I've got over sixty lbs of malted grain, 10 oz hops, 3 lbs each of malt extract and unrefined sugar, a couple billion yeast cells happily budding away in a starter solution, recipes for a double IPA at 10% abv and an oatmeal stout at half that, vague intentions of getting a second running off the double IPA mash (thus generating 16 1/2 gallons of beer), but all that starts turning to beer on Sunday. Today, well, I'm a little messed up on cold med'cine but more or less sober.

__________________
Light a man a fire, and he will be warm while it burns.
Set a man on fire, and he will be warm for the rest of his life.

uncle phil

fuck me...just...fuck me...

__________________
"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
-----------------------------------------
"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
-----------------------------------------
never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.

uncle phil

that he did...

__________________
"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
-----------------------------------------
"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
-----------------------------------------
never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.

Charlatan

You know... you really aren't my type. But can I make a suggestion? You will have better luck finding someone if you brush your teeth...

__________________
"My hands are on fire. Hands are on fire. Ain't got no more time for all you charlatans and liars."
- Old Man Luedecke

Tophat665

Phil, you'd also have better luck if you went into a thread titled "I'm Drunk and Horny!!!" than you would in one titled "I'm Sober!!!"

__________________
Light a man a fire, and he will be warm while it burns.
Set a man on fire, and he will be warm for the rest of his life.

uncle phil

i quit....

__________________
"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
-----------------------------------------
"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
-----------------------------------------
never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.

Fly

AA is for quiters phil.........

__________________
BASTARD

SterlingStudios

uncle phil

so, if i get drunk and get laid i can get back in the club?

wait, i need to be sober?

never mind...

__________________
"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
-----------------------------------------
"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
-----------------------------------------
never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.

Fly

*passes by thread once again*

__________________
BASTARD

SterlingStudios

noodle

Depressingly and overtly sober. Have to go back to work tomorrow. Spent much of my 11 day vacation unable to post here. Wait.... do muscle relaxers count? Oops..

/slinks out door.

__________________

uncle phil

I went to a bar and I asked for a drink,
They gave me a glass and they showed me the sink.

CHORUS:
Hallelujah, I'm a bum,
Hallelujah, bum again,
Hallelujah, give us a handout
To revive us again.

__________________
"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
-----------------------------------------
"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
-----------------------------------------
never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.

Charlatan

I'm off the wagon for the moment... Hendrick's and Tonic in hand... lalala

__________________
"My hands are on fire. Hands are on fire. Ain't got no more time for all you charlatans and liars."
- Old Man Luedecke

uncle phil

you doin' that with the cucumber slice, like it suggests?

__________________
"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
-----------------------------------------
"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
-----------------------------------------
never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.