C_man

I recently received this from a friend in an e-mail, thought it was worth sharing.

Questions about Canada that we all wonder about but are afraid
to ask.
Now that Vancouver has won the chance to host the 2010 Winter
Olympics, the following are (supposedly?!) some of the questions people
all over the world are asking.

These questions about Canada were actually(?) posted on an
international Tourism Website.

Q: I have never seen it warm on Canadian TV, so how do the plants
grow? (UK)
A: We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around and watch
them die.

Q: Will I be able to see Polar Bears in the street? (USA)
A: Depends how much you've been drinking.

Q: I want to walk from Vancouver to Toronto-- can I follow the
railroad tracks? (Sweden)
A: Sure, it's only four thousand miles, take lots of water.

Q: Is it safe to run around in the bushes in Canada? (Sweden)
A: So it's true what they say about Swedes.

Q: It is imperative that I find the names and addresses of places to
contact for a stuffed Beaver. (Italy)
A: Let's not touch this one.

Q: Are there any ATMs (cash machines) in Canada? Can you send me a
list of them in Toronto, Vancouver, Edmonton and
Halifax? (UK)
A: What did your last slave die of?

Q: Can you give me some information about hippo racing in Canada?(USA)
A: A-fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe.
Ca-na-da is that big country to your North . . . oh forget it. Sure, the hippo racing is every Tuesday night in Calgary. Come naked!

Q: Which direction is North in Canada? (USA)
A: Face south and then turn 180 degrees. Contact us when you get there
and we'll send the rest of the directions.

Q: Can I bring cutlery into Canada? (UK)
A: Why? Just use your fingers like we do.

Q: Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir schedule? (USA)
A: Aus-tri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-man-y, which
is....oh forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night in Vancouver and in Calgary, right after the hippo races.Come naked.

Q: Do you have perfume in Canada? (Germany)
A: Nope! WE don't stink.

Q: I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth. Can
you tell me where I can sell it in Canada? (USA)
A: Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather.

Q: Do you celebrate Thanksgiving in Canada? (USA)
A: Only at Thanksgiving.

Q: Are there supermarkets in Toronto and is milk available all year
round? (Germany)
A: No, we are a peaceful civilization of Vegan hunter/gatherers. Milk
is illegal.

Q: I have a question about a famous animal in Canada, but I forget its
name. It's a kind of big horse with horns. (USA)
A: It's called a moose. They are tall and very violent, eating the
brains of anyone walking close to them. You can scare them off by spraying
yourself with human urine before you go out walking.

Q: I was in Canada in 1969 on R+R, and I want to contact the girl I
dated while I was staying in Surrey, BC. Can you help? (USA)
A: Yes, and you will still have to pay her by the hour.

Q: Will I be able to speak English most places I go? (USA)
A: Yes, but you will have to learn it first.

__________________
"Oh, Snap!"

IC3

That's great, But i find it hard to believe some of those questions are for real, Like..."Which way is north in canada" I don't know, Could be true..

__________________
"To win any battle, you must fight as if you were already dead" -Musashi

C_man

Who knows really. Some of those questions just seem too out there I agree but you never know I guess.....

__________________
"Oh, Snap!"