To the mushroom hiding under the cheese of a slice of pepperoni...
 

Nice try you sneaky bastard! :hmm:

Asta!!

One Up

http://prt.gettiffany.org/1up.JPG

Mario's Mushrooms are the only acceptable mushrooms. Mushrooms and I are in fact mortal enemies. :hmm:

Asta!!

I ingested some mushrooms this weekend. Everything started spinning and melting, it was nuts.

Yes yes...the evil of mushrooms is abundant.

Asta!!

I do love me my mushrooms, but I love me my feta cheetah more

<b>Untitled</b>, what is fetish cheese?

You can run K-wise but the relentless onslaught of the mushroom will eventually break through your defenses.
It is only a matter of time.

Listen, and understand. That mushroom is out there. It can't be bargained with.
It can't be reasoned with. It doesn't feel pity, or remorse, or fear.
And it absolutely will not stop, ever, until it is eaten.

Eat with me if you want to live!

not Fetish cheese, feta cheese. I have no idea where its from, how its made, or anything, all I know is that its YUMMY!

fetish cheese: a cheese made in the dark underbelly of Paris, France... It is the product of cows that have been lovingly, artfully bound in the finest silken cords. The milk is collected by subs of the finest qualtity. Collected, the milk is whipped and then poured into rubber molds.

Prized for it's kinky character, fetish cheese is the greatest cheese ever eaten from the buttocks of your top.

Such a man has been born that can and will stop the mushroom. That man is me. Join me Hamburger and together we shall smite the mushrooms into the very bowels of hell where they belong!

Asta!!

I like having mushrooms in my bowels...

as long as they went through my mouth first, I mean.
That sounds bad.

But I *do* want some of that fine Parisian Fetish cheese. Sounds dominating.

Ah yes the Feta Cheese you speak of looks like this.
http://www.cheesebook.com/types/pictures/feta.gif

I myself have never tried it but have been told though it is quite tasty, it does do a number on your breath.

Mushrooms = R.I.H. (<-- And the H is for hell!:mad: )

Asta!!

Most humans don't realise they're living a symbiotic existance with the fungus.

Why else would a rational person crave a 'food' which looks and tastes foul whilst having zero nutritional value?

I'll tell you why... the psylocibes have taken over their brain functions.

Thankfully, there are many with no brain function

This only true if you eat them raw... fried up in some butter, psylocibes taste quite delightful...


at least that's what the little voice inside my head keeps telling me

Charlatan, what you're actually tasting there is fried butter (a delightful tasty treat for the whole family, no doubt) but are the mushrooms really adding anything to that snack?

I don't think so. You've been assymilated.

Resistance is futile...

Futile?? I'll resist the mushrooms 'til the day I die, and after that my zombiefied corpse will not only resist them, but attack anyone who REFUSES to resist them. Take that you dirty fungi!

Fungi feeds on corpses...

Indeed, once you're a zombie you wont have to worry about eating mushrooms, you'll have to worry about mushrooms eating YOU!

Damn! My zombie/fungi plan is falling apart at the seams! I knew I should have thought this through before I sold my soul for zombie powers...

Can you actually fry butter? I mean, it's a liquid at frying temperatures.

And after all, K-Wise, that mushroom tried so hard. You couldn't have given it a pity nibble?

Stock up on that stuff that cures athlete's foot, then spray it all over your rotting body.

Is this not a little harsh on the mushrooms? Maybe you should hear their side of the story...

Charlatan here reporting from a rotting log. We are here to get the muchroom's story stright from the fungi's mouth. So Mr. Shroom, what is your story...

"..................................................................................................."

I see, um... no a big talker, eh? OK. So you have nothing to say about your allegedly boring character, flavour and the fact that humans continue to consume your kind on a regular basis?

"..................................................................................................."

Well, that seems to be all we are going to get out of this little fungi, we now return you to your regularly scheduled thread...

Ok who's responsible for this... I was told the mushroom was prepped and ready to tell all... God! I feel like Geraldo in Al Capone's vault...

Sorry. Didn't count on the little bugger holding up so well under interrogation. Anything that can withstand such pressure can't be trusted. I'm on your side now

That's a thought... or I could just try to get a soul from someone else, then I could become a ghost! Mushrooms can't kill ghosts but I bet ghosts could do some things to those dirty fungi.

Ghost fungi taste good cooked in ectoplasm...

And don't forget to wash it down with some bright green, thirst quenching, ecto-cooler!

http://cribblog.blogs.com/cribb/images/ecto-cooler.jpg

Slimer Approved! :thumbsup:

K-Asta is such a fungi.

^ ahahaha Take it back! :thumbsup:

If you get cremated you don't have to worry about viscious fungi feeding on your corpse. I like the idea of being buried so my casket will be a casket of solid steel! Rust proof! By then if my mission is successful all fungi will be obliterated! :mad:

Asta!!

What happens when there are some spores on you and the casket closes, then they eventually develop into fungi??? What then??? You'll be stuck forever with fungi growing on you, I hope you're happy.

These spores will be non existant. No spores shall touch my dead body for in accordance with my will I shall see to it that there is no way for a fungi to survive inside my death bed. None will be on me when I descend, and none will get in once I am buried. I will also have a boom box inside playing "November Rain" on repeat until it runs out of battery.

Asta!!

i hate to tell you this, but the pizza guy didn't wash his hands either before he made your pizza.
in fact, he never washes his hands.
thusly, his hands grow that insidious fungi.
the scientific truth is that a mushroom or two will always fall from the pizza dude's hands onto your pizza every time he makes your pizza.

perhaps you should avoid pizza...

^ Never! I shall simply slay this individual with evil mushroom hands! :mad:

Asta!!

You best step off dissin on da 'shrooms, my peeps. They might bust a cap in yo' ass.

Seriously, though, I love the little, slippery fuckers. The pert little cremini, the mysterious morel, the ever elusive truffle, the cloud ear, tiny enoki huddled in bunches, the ineffable shittake, the wise porcini, the cleaver oyseter, the broad and beefy portabella, and the inestimable matsutake. Even the lowly white button mushroom, rank upon rank in serried rows in the manure, a gnomish army about to march to their end in boiling butter for my tongue's delight. I love them all. And you will to when my sinister plan comes to fruition, spreading spores of fungiphilia through the hidden channels of the internet. Oh, Norton will avail you not on that day, but spinach and gruyere will be friends to you.

Mmm. Hungry now. So hungry.

mmm truffles....
http://www.truffes-de-provence.com/images/produits.gif

And where would chinese food be w/o mushrooms?

mmmm... chinese food...