Being on Fire - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

Tophat665 · 12-26-2004, 08:03 AM

I have been thinking about fire a lot recently. I read "Good Omens", and fire always comes to mind when Revelations is contemplated. I am getting ready to start a new D&D game, and I am playing a mage who is arson waiting to happen. And, of course, there is my new avatar, title, and quote. So I was going through the things that I've saved from newsgroup posts over the years, and I ran across this, and I thought to myself, "Myself, we need to share this with the rest of the class."

Quote:

<b>Being on Fire</b>
<i>An Excremeditation</i>

We spend almost all our time not being on fire, yet fire is one of the four traditional elements and without it we would be cold and there would be no toast. We owe it to ourselves to contemplate fire. Not just fire, but related concepts as well: flamability, burning, burnt, inflamability. Fire has been used by man and yetikind for a very long time. Fire is used to burn toast, puppies and virgins. What other element is so universal that it can bring those three things together?

Fire is a powerful tool as well. A big enough lever can move a building, but a tiny little match can fix what's wrong with Southern California. Fire does more than just physical work, it can effect you psychologically as well. Gaze into a fire and the genes of some tiny rodent-like ancestor will scream up through the aeons "THIS IS IMPORTANT STUFF!" Being such an important tool the CON don't want you use it how you see fit. They want you to burn DURAFLAME logs. They outlaw cooking over fire that is not CON controlled and authorized, like LA's air pollution comes from charcoal grills rather than CON factories. Interest in fire is labeled a sexual perversion. Big fires are particularly prohibited, you need a CON issued licence for a Bonfire ("beautiful fire"), you need a CON issued licence for fireworks. The CON wants to surround us with inflammable objects until we have no choice but to pay for the fire maintained in generating stations by the CON utility company or only burn the CON delivered poison gas that gets pumped into our homes. Think about that, you let a quasi-governmental corporation install a poison gas line into your home and then YOU pay THEM for it. Used to be if you wanted toast you could just set you kids PJs on fire, but now everything in your home is UL listed (that means inflammable).

In a way, fire is like slack. Everyone has the capability to make their own for free. Once you have a little you have everything you need to make more. But if you make too much the CON notices you and beats you down cause your only supposed to get it from them. If you enjoy it in large quantities in non-CON authorized contexts you are labeled a sexual deviant. But they are both your birthright and you must take them back. Now personally I'd rather be full of slack than on fire, but fire is better in one important way. Getting others to open up to true slack can be a difficult task, many people are so brainwashed that they don't even believe it exists. But everyone, no matter how thoughroughly programmed by the CON, can be set on fire and once someone is on fire they can comprehend slack. So despair not fellow ministers! If you find your words falling on deaf ears you now have a powerful teaching tool. Search out those most in need of slack, who are sadly often the most resistant to having their eyes opened, and set them on fire. They will thank you for it later.

Myrkury

Stay warm, everybody.

Fly · 12-26-2004, 05:01 PM

fuck that.........i have a fire pit and i'll keep myself warm thanx very much you CON fuckers....almost an appropriate name too Top.....

Stiltzkin · 12-26-2004, 05:35 PM

CON? Slack?

Tophat665 · 12-26-2004, 05:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Stiltzkin

CON? Slack?

It's from the book of the Sub Genius. Slack is the quality of having no obligations upon you. The CON is the vast conspiracy that goes so far beyond right and left wing. He talks about the yeti self that lives inside each of us too. It's been far too long since I have read the book, so I don't have the dogma down any more, but it was surely every bit as amusing and sensical as Scientology or Christianity.

uncle phil · 12-26-2004, 06:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by flyman

fuck that.........i have a fire pit and i'll keep myself warm thanx very much you CON fuckers....almost an appropriate name too Top.....

jeebus, fly, you think that stack's tall enough...

and top, i'm working on an "in kind" response...

Fly · 12-26-2004, 06:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by uncle phil

jeebus, fly, you think that stack's tall enough...

i have a top on it now phil.

the neighbours don't mind,....i'm keepin' warm and no body gave me any gears about my choice to have a fire........

i'm stylin' baby

Fly · 12-26-2004, 06:45 PM

hey Top........that comment of mine was in no way directed towards you man......just sick of the "corps" tryin' to fuck us all over eh......

Tophat665 · 12-26-2004, 09:29 PM

No offense taken. I thought you were sounding off against those who would reave you of slack, and so you were. All is well.

Fire · 12-31-2004, 02:40 AM

I feel that I would be remiss not to mention my status with regards to this- no one is currently on me- that said, no one except my wife is authorised to be "On Fire" - anyone who gets on Fire will therefore be told to get the fuck off of me and move along- this public safety message brought to you by the Fnords..........

Sion · 01-04-2005, 12:14 PM

ahh Slack. I remember Slack. I miss my Slack, wish I had it back.

12-26-2004, 05:01 PM	#2 (permalink)
Fly see the links to my music? Location: Beautiful British Columbia	fuck that.........i have a fire pit and i'll keep myself warm thanx very much you CON fuckers....almost an appropriate name too Top..... __________________ BASTARD SterlingStudios

12-26-2004, 05:35 PM	#3 (permalink)
Stiltzkin Junkie	CON? Slack? __________________ The most important thing in this world is love.

12-26-2004, 06:45 PM	#7 (permalink)
Fly see the links to my music? Location: Beautiful British Columbia	hey Top........that comment of mine was in no way directed towards you man......just sick of the "corps" tryin' to fuck us all over eh...... __________________ BASTARD SterlingStudios

12-26-2004, 09:29 PM	#8 (permalink)
Tophat665 Minion of the scaléd ones Location: Northeast Jesusland	No offense taken. I thought you were sounding off against those who would reave you of slack, and so you were. All is well. __________________ Light a man a fire, and he will be warm while it burns. Set a man on fire, and he will be warm for the rest of his life.

12-31-2004, 02:40 AM	#9 (permalink)
Fire Warrior Smith Location: missouri	I feel that I would be remiss not to mention my status with regards to this- no one is currently on me- that said, no one except my wife is authorised to be "On Fire" - anyone who gets on Fire will therefore be told to get the fuck off of me and move along- this public safety message brought to you by the Fnords.......... __________________ Thought the harder, Heart the bolder, Mood the more as our might lessens

01-04-2005, 12:14 PM	#10 (permalink)
Sion Dumb all over...a little ugly on the side Location: In the room where the giant fire puffer works, and the torture never stops.	ahh Slack. I remember Slack. I miss my Slack, wish I had it back. __________________ He's the best, of course, of all the worst. Some wrong been done, he done it first. -fz I jus' want ta thank you...falettinme...be mice elf...agin...